Kismet
by MarineLullaby
Summary: Clarissa Morganstern is running. An apparent chance meeting puts her on the radar of fellow Shadowhunter Jace Wayland, but can he and his family set aside their pride long enough to see someone in real need rather than just Valentines daughter? R&R please
1. Runes

**JPOV**

It was Monday. Seven forty three on a Monday morning, if you insist I get specific about it. Rain was coming down in sheets from the thunderous grey clouds over head, playing havoc with my hair. I could feel it sticking to my face and forehead as if it had been pasted there with glue.

_Great_, I thought bitterly as I adjusted my position on the brick wall I was using for a seat, _It's Monday; it's raining and my hair looks less than perfect. Just wonderful. _

I glared up at the sky just as a roll of thunder echoed through the sky, feeling as though it had personally set out to offend me today.. I wouldn't have been surprised if there was a huge neon sign hovering above my head that read 'I'm in a foul mood. Stop me and ask how to make it worse'. On the other hand, I couldn't help but admit that even if the sun was shining I'd be in just as foul a mood. It was just the way it was going to be today.

"You look like someone just ran over the cat."

I immediately slid from the wall, shifting my glare to Isabelle. She snorted and raised a perfectly shaped eyebrow, her mouth set in an amused line.

"I loathe Mondays," I muttered, reading the question in her face.

"I know. You say that every week. It's not so bad, though. Just think of all the fun we'll have with the mundies today!" she grinned wickedly and hoisted her huge red leather bag up on to her shoulder. I glanced at the grey pea coat she was wearing and envied the fact she had a hood to shelter her head.

"Fun isn't the word I'd use." I replied blandly and took out my Stele. I twirled it absently in my hands, finding a small amount of comfort in the heat it radiated.

"Where's your idiot brother? We're going to be late."

Isabelle looked over her shoulder and nodded towards the door to the Institute. Alec stood in the doorway, shoving his feet hurriedly in to a pair of scruffy tennis shoes and looking almost as irritated as I felt.

"Hurry your lame ass up, Lightwood!" I called. He looked up swiftly and rolled his eyes. He finally stumbled, bleary eyed, out of the doorway and came to stand by his sisters side, yawning hugely.

"Remind me why we have to do this, again?" he implored lazily, running a hand through his already wet hair. Isabelle huffed and placed her hands on her hips; we'd had this conversation at least three times over breakfast this morning.

"Because apparently, in order to become well rounded humans, we need a proper mundane education." She reeled off automatically, knowing her speech perfectly by now. It was the same thing their mother, who was really mine, too, for all intensive purposes, had been saying for the last few weeks. I still thought it was complete bull.

"Obviously it's not enough to be an insanely talented and attractive Shadowhunter like me anymore. Shame. I was getting by so well." I stage whispered sarcastically to Alec. He snickered and shook his head.

"Whatever the reason is, I don't care much for the idea. It seems a little degrading."

"By the angel, can we just leave already? I'm getting wet." I seethed. Isabelle laughed wearily and tossed me an umbrella while Alec simply shook his head again, muttering something that sounded suspiciously like 'vein bastard' under his breath.

* * *

"By the angel…" I hissed furiously. I'd been sat for an entire ten minutes trying to light the stupid Bunsen burner and still I was having no luck. I must have been given a dud box of matches or was working at a broken gas tap or something. I was doing it right, so it can't have been me. I always did everything right, and that's a fact right there.

"That's a funny thing you keep saying." A voice whispered in my ear. I started and turned sharply to the source of the voice. I sighed and rolled my eyes when I realised it was the girl from the bench next to mine. She was looking at me with what I suppose could pass as a seductive look and leaning entirely too close so I could smell her over powering vanilla perfume, like she had done in English before this, and Math before that. She grinned as I appraised her, tossing a chunk of golden hair over her shoulder and pushing her chest out so I couldn't help but let my eyes wander. There was just _so much _to look at.

"Are you in to some weird religion, or something?" she asked, fluttering her eyelashes. I laughed internally at her efforts but I have been and always will be the only blonde I would ever be interested in.

"Or something," I muttered, turning back to the stupid contraption with a steely resolve.

"I think that's cool. Do you need a hand? I'm Louise, by the way."

"Jace, and no. I've got this."

"You don't look like you've got It." she pointed out unhelpfully and I shot her an annoyed look. She sniffed indignantly and turned her back to me, obviously offended by my offhandedness. I congratulated myself on my ability to irritate people. I don't care what Alec and Isabelle might say; it is a highly useful skill to have under ones belt.

I sat, seething, for the next half hour. I was about ready to throw the damn Bunsen burner out of the window, along with Alec who kept smirking at me from the other side of the room. His Bunsen had lit straight away and he had completed the test we were supposed to be conducting, earning himself praise from the teacher. Not that I care about that kind of thing.

When the bell finally rang for lunch I couldn't get out of the classroom quick enough.

"You didn't look too happy in there." Alec observed as we followed the crowd of students milling towards the cafeteria. I laughed bitterly and shot him a sceptical look.

"And you looked _too_ happy in there. Man, you'd think you were and actual mundie."

"Don't insult me," he frowned, but let the subject drop. We walked in an unusually awkward silence to the cafeteria, meeting Isabelle outside of her Spanish class. She was literally buzzing with excitement.

"Ohmygosh, I love this whole idea. I know I was a bit weird with it at first but it's good to be able to be with people our own age for once. There's these girls in my class who invited me shopping with them, isn't that cool?"

"Yeah. Cool." I said blandly, giving my nails my attention.

She ignored me and turned to Alec.

"How have your classes been?"

"I think they've been great. Jace has been having trouble fitting in, though."

I shot him a look that clearly would have killed if I had that ability, but, alas, I didn't. He laughed quietly and began to explain to Isabelle the horrors of my morning.

"…And then he sat for the entire Science class staring at his Bunsen burner like it was a disease. He couldn't light it at all. Y'know Jace, you were putting the match to the wrong part of the instrument."

I rolled my eyes angrily and turned to face them, stopping them dead in their tracks.

"I don't care. Why do I need to know how to do that shit anyway?"

"It might be useful." Isabelle argued back, her hands sternly on her hips. Passers by looked at me with questions in their eyes but I simply huffed and glared at every one of them who dared to meet my eyes.

"Yeah, it might be useful to a mundie. Newsflash, we're not mundies! We're Shadowhunters, in case you've forgotten already. I highly doubt that some tube filled with gas will help much during a demon attack. This is degrading."

"Jace-" Alec started to say something but I threw up my hand to shut him up.

"I'm going. I'll see you guys later at the Institute."

And with that, I turned on my heel and strode away, ignoring their calls. I had no idea where I was heading, but before I knew it, I was out of the school and striding across the car park like the hounds of hell were snapping hungrily at my feet. I threw out my stele once I was out of the sight of other students and quickly traced an invisibility rune on to the base of my wrist, revelling in the soft kiss of pain it left on my skin. I was barley aware of where I was heading, but it felt like I had no control. I shoved my stele in to the back pocket of my black jeans and made a beeline for a patch of forest on the edge of the car park, ducking under branches and shielding my head from stray raindrops that fell on my face. The soft, wet ground squelched under my shoes as I marched forward towards a little clearing in the trees. I could spot a bench in the centre of the clearing, just off a path. I must have been on the edge of a park or something.

With a huff, I flung my self on to the bench and thrust my head in to my hands, kneading my eyes hard with the base of my palms. I was aware that I should have felt ashamed of running away from the school. It was weak, and Jace Wayland never ran away from anything, ever. But I was too busy feeling sorry for my self to care about that yet.

A short while later I heard someone clear their throat in front of where I sat. I didn't bother to look up.

"I thought I told you I'd see you at home later?" I grumbled, knowing that only Alec or Isabelle would have a chance of seeing me with my rune in place. I was a bit pissed that they'd followed me here, if I was honest about it.

"That's a little forward isn't it, considering I'm a complete stranger?"

I frowned in to my hands at the sound of the unfamiliar female voice. I looked up, then, baffled.

In front of me stood a tiny, fragile looking girl with wide bottle green eyes and an amused smirk gracing her lips. A cascade of fiery red hair tumbled down past her shoulders in smooth curls, making a direct and obvious contrast to her silky ivory skin. Her hands were folded lightly across her chest and she cleared her throat again, quirking up and eyebrow and commanding my full attention. I could only sit, dumbstruck in my seat.

"Why are you staring at me?" she asked, her head tilted a little way to one side.

"Why… h-_how_ can you see me?" I stammered, sitting up straighter in my seat and plunging my hand in to my backpack, feeling for the hilt of my seraph blade. I mumbled its name almost silently and felt it glow in to life beneath my fingertips.

The girl snickered and rolled her eyes, whispering something under her breath that I didn't quite catch.

"It's not hard. You're sat right there."

"No, I don't think you understand. _How can you see me_?" I asked more desperately. I tried to peal back any glamour that might be hiding what she really was- a demon or a downworlder maybe… her skin was incredibly pale and she was beautiful, but I'd know if she was a vampire. She rolled her eyes.

"The same way you can see me." she answered somewhat cryptically. I exhaled an irritated breath through my nose, making her quirk her eyebrows even higher. My grip tightened around my seraph blade.

"You don't have to arm your self against me." she observed, gesturing towards my backpack.

"How did you know?"

"I can see the blade glowing through the canvas of your bag. I'm not blind."

I gawped a little but recovered quickly, pulling the blade out of the bag completely and pointing it to her chest. She laughed humourlessly and drew her own out of the back pocket of her jeans, naming it as she twirled it expertly in her hand so the point of the blade was pressing against my neck. My resolve didn't waver, and neither did hers.

"I said you didn't need the weapon against me." she said with tight eyes. I flicked my gaze towards her own seraph blade and laughed lightly.

"I can see that. I'll put it away if you tell me how you could see me."

She shook her head, letting out an exasperated breath.

"It's it obvious by now? Hell, I know I made that rune to stop them seeking me out, but still. This is ridiculous. I know what you are. You're a Shadowhunter, like me."

"Like you?" I asked quickly. The girl didn't look like a normal Shadowhunter. She had an air of weakness around her that only mundies possessed. But then, as I dove deeper, I could feel that there was something about her that I couldn't put my finger on; a kind of power emanating from her body that not even Shadowhunters possessed, simmering dangerously under the surface.

"You're impossible," she laughed and shoved the blade back in to her jeans. I didn't lower mine an inch, still not trusting her. What had she meant when she'd said she'd _made_ the rune and why had it stopped him from knowing what she was immediately?

"Here. I'll show you mine if you show me yours." She grinned wickedly and pulled up the sleeve of her sweater to her elbow. I followed suit and we placed our arms beside one another.

I actually had to fight to keep down my gasp of surprise and keep my face impassive since Jace Wayland did not do shocked or surprised. She'd been telling me the truth and the proof was on her arms. It was littered with thin white scars of runes, obviously made by a stele, and there on the base of her left wrist was the _mendelin_ rune for concealment- an inky black tattoo of overlapping circles standing out obviously on her pale skin. To the left of the rune there seemed to be an addition; an extra loop of the overlap with a tiny ink star in the centre.

"Now do you get it? Or do I have to write out a detailed explanation for you?"

"Feisty, aren't we? I get it, but we didn't think there were any more Nephilim in New York. Do the Clave know you're here?"

"Yup," she said, popping the 'p' lazily but she averted her eyes to the floor, like she was hiding something.

"Oh. So what's your name?"

"Clary. Yours?"

"Jace Wayland; practically perfect in every way."

"And modest to boot, I see. Well, Jace Wayland; practically perfect in every way, you're sitting in my seat."

* * *

**CPOV**

"Your seat? I don't see your name on it." he- Jace- said sarcastically. I laughed a little and pointed my finger towards the small engraving at the back of the bench that read 'Clary'. He stared at it, bemused, for a second before he laughed disbelievingly and scooted over to make room for me. I hovered unsurely for a long moment, trying to decide if I should trust this Jace character or not, before my mind made the decision for me and I sat down figuring one lone Shadowhunter boy was unlikely to be able to do _me_ much harm.

"So what brings you to this neck of the woods?" I asked him slowly, turning to face the fierce looking golden boy beside me. His face was all hard planes and angles, but was softened by his amused tawny eyes and lopsided grin. He had a profile to die for, and I immediately wanted to draw him.

"I'm escaping from the mundie school and my brother and sister." He drawled as he span his stele around in his fingers. I watched with interest.

"The Mundie School? Why the angel were you there?"

"My question exactly. It was Alec and Isabelle's mothers' idea. Well, she's pretty much my mom too, I guess. Maryse. She said we needed to become well rounded human beings or some crap like that." He huffed, tossing his stele a little harder than before.

"That's degrading." I offered by means of consolation.

"That's what I said." He shrugged. I watched him twirl the stele again and again in his hand until he finally spoke up.

"So, why are you in New York? You can't have been here long if the Clave haven't informed Robert and Maryse that you're here."

I didn't answer for a while, not knowing what to say. I knew my hesitation would make him suspicious, but what was I suppose to tell him? The truth was too complicated and dangerous that there was no way I could say it, but I didn't feel like I could lie to him either. The boy offered me some kind of strange comfort that I hadn't felt since…

"I just needed to get away from Idris."

Jace turned to me with a stare that was so oddly intense that I felt like I couldn't move from my seat. I was pinned there by the hurt and confusion in his eyes. I wondered what I'd done to cause the pure agony in his eyes but my thoughts were quickly interrupted.

"Making friends already, Clarissa?"

My entire body stiffened at the sound of the voice, so I was as tense as a lioness ready to strike her prey. I turned my head slowly to my right, my eyes narrowing as I sought out the figure I knew would be stood there in the trees. He was dressed in traditional black, his sword drawn from its sheath and a sly grin gracing his lips. I uncurled myself from the bench and took a step towards him, drawing my own weapon in preparation for a fight. Jace, who was still beside me, frowned and stood up too so he could draw his own stele and seraph blade. All signs of hurt were gone from his eyes but it was replaced by an intense need for action. It almost felt as if he knew the man in front of him meant danger, or worse- death.

"Hello Jonathon. I'd say it was nice to see you here, but I'd be lying. Why did you follow me?"

"I just missed you, really." Jonathon said airily, his head titled daringly to one side.

"Yes, and pigs really do fly. Come on. Did he send you for me?"

I knew Jace was frowning beside me but I didn't dare look away from Jonathon's eyes. I knew he fought dirty, having trained with him for years, and I knew he would have no reservations going after the boy if it made it easier to get to me. I wouldn't let that happen.

"He did, so you can either come now without me hurting you or this charming gentleman you've been entertaining, or I kill him where he stands and take you by force. It's your choice, Clary. I trust you'll make the right decision."

I truly laughed at that and grinned his way, loving how his confidence fell at the sound of my amusement. He suddenly didn't look so sure of himself- the grip on his blade tightening so much that his knuckles turned white.

"Go to hell, Jonathon." I spat, before charging towards him.

* * *

**JPOV**

The sound of metal on metal erupted in my ears and that primal, animal instinct in me that yearned for the fight kicked in. I watched in complete shock as Clary charged at the man she'd been speaking with and swung her sword towards his torso with incredible, inhuman strength that she should not have been capable of having. Her blows struck the man's sword with a resounding _thunk_ that drew me out of my state of awe.

"Clary!" I yelled, running head first in to the swinging of swords and the slicing of blades. There was something about this girl… I had to protect her no matter what. Trust no longer felt like an issue after the conversation I'd seen her have with the man. I just knew that she needed help, and I could give it to her.

"Jace, help me!" she panted, and I did as she said. Without a second thought I threw my self in front of her, in to the attacking line of the man. He glared at me and let out a feral snarl before diving towards me. I blocked his attack easily and fell in to the adrenaline pumping routine of attacking an opponent. I refused to deliver a deathblow- I would be killed my self for murdering another Nephilim- so I stuck to swiping at his arms and legs with my seraph blade. In truth, it seemed like the blade was no match for his dangerous blood red sword but it held out like a loyal friend.

I noticed that Clary had disappeared from my vision so I called her name over the ruckus I was creating with the man. She shuffled behind me, though what she was doing was a complete mystery to me. With one last heave, I managed to knock the man to the ground, panting for breath. Without hesitation I ran to Clary's side.

She was crouched on the ground, mapping out a rune that I had never seen before on the ground.

"What are you doing? He wont stay down for long." I said quietly, keeping my seraph blade pointed out towards the man.

"Jace. Will you trust me?" she asked me, her eyes wild and distant. I frowned but nodded my head. It didn't feel like I had control over the action.

"Good. When I say now, I need you to jump through that portal over by the tree and take yourself back to your Institute. I will follow straight after you and close it up, but promise you won't come back through if I don't make it through. Do you promise?"

"I can't promise that." I said stubbornly. The man was pushing himself off the ground now, massaging his shoulders and neck. I tensed again, ready to fight.

"Jace. Do as I say." Her eyes were dangerous as I searched them for any sign of mistrust or deception. I couldn't find any.

"Fine. But you better fucking explain all this when we get there."

"Deal. Well, the rune is ready, are you?" she asked me seriously and I nodded my head. She held my gaze for a long moment before screaming 'Now!' at the top of her lungs.

And I bolted for the portal, not caring yet how the hell she'd created the damn thing. I reached the edge and turned just in time to see a ball of energy erupt from Clary's hands and hit the man square in the chest. He crumpled to the floor, a look of pure shock on his face.

"What the f-?" I shouted, completely aghast, but Clary sprinted to my side and knocked me through the portal. I felt the somewhat familiar feeling of spinning weightlessly through space, building up an out of control momentum before I crashed to the floor on top of Clary. I looked down in to her now exhausted eyes and pushed my self up so my weight was resting on my hands and not on her. With a deep breath, I shook my head and swore loudly. She grimaced beneath me as her eyelids dropped with sleep. The portal behind us closed up slowly but before it did I saw the dark shape of the attacker struggling to his feet, a look of pure unadulterated fury gracing his face.

"Clary. Clary, you need to tell me; what the hell are you?"

Her eyelashes fluttered.

"Angels…" she breathed almost inaudibly, "he's part… and I'm part… my father. He's- my father is…"

I watched her struggle to form full sentences before, finally, her eyes drooped closed again and she slipped in to unconsciousness.


	2. A Matter Of Heritage

**A/N: I forgot to do one of these on the first chapter, so here it is :) ****I am not, and nor will I ever (regrettably) be Cassandra Clare. I just like using her characters to preoccupy myself from university work. **

**By the way, this is my first ever fan fiction, so please don't hesitate to give me any criticism or pointers… whatever takes your fancy. Thanks to the people who reviewed the first chapter! They made me smile.**

**Hope you enjoy the next chapter.**

* * *

When I woke I was trapped by soft linen. I tried to untangle myself from the cocoon of sheets but even the smallest movement made my head throb painfully- like I was being hit over and over again with a hammer or even worse, I was locked in a tiny room with mindless trance music blasting in my ears. I was exhausted from creating the portal and that rune within seconds of each other, but it was necessary. Jonathon probably would have killed me if I hadn't, even if he was just sent to collect me. The distinction between dead and alive was something he didn't bother to address very often.

I thought sluggishly back to the rune that I'd made. My mind worked viscously, as though my memories were made of tar and could only ooze steadily back in to my brain. I'd had no idea what the rune would _really_ do before I used it- the only prompt I'd had was my blind panic and desperate need for a diversion. It could have gone extremely wrong and hurt me or the Shadowhunter but it didn't and for that I was entirely grateful, even if it had completely drained me of energy.

I lay still for some time, concentrating on making my shallow breaths deeper and more even, letting my hands roam my body for bruises or soreness. I frowned slightly when I felt silk beneath my hands. I shoved aside the sharp pain in my chest as nothing more than an inconvenience that prevented me from getting out of bed and explaining myself to Jace. I still had no idea how to go about doing that, though, but I knew I would definitely have to talk in the near future. Jace had already heard and seen enough to put two and two together and come to the conclusion that something was extremely wrong.

"Do you think she's even still alive?" I heard a girl say thinly some way off to my side. I kept my eyes tight shut, partly because I was too tired to open them and partly because I wanted to know what the stranger had to say about me.

"Of course she is. Look at her chest; you can see her breathing. Dead people don't tend to breathe, Isabelle." Another unfamiliar voice said from the same direction as the first, his tone dry and sarcastic. Isabelle huffed quietly. The sound of heels clicking on stone met my ears as I sensed her moving in my direction. The sensation of feeling and not seeing her close proximity was unnerving.

"You know what I mean, Alec. Jace said she wasn't even injured- that she just did something with some runes and collapsed. Imagine that! Performing a rune or two and blacking out. She must be a newby."

I balked inwardly at her accusation. I was sure she didn't mean to be rude, but implying I was weak didn't sit too well with me. Not after everything I'd gone through.

"I don't know," Alec said quietly and I could feel his curious stare on my face, "Jace seemed shook up about what happened. He wouldn't even tell me the details, which is weird. I've never seen him actually shaken by something like this before. There must be something we're missing."

"You do realise you sound like two old ladies gossiping on the subway, don't you?"

My eyes flashed open as soon as his voice met my ears. It felt like hearing the voice of an old friend who I hadn't seen in years; the same rush of excitement, nervousness and embarrassment gelled within me to create a kind of warm tension in the pit of my stomach. I stared intently at the mural on the ceiling as the feeling intensified with every soft footstep.

"Oh, hi Jace. We thought you were still out." Alec said swiftly.

"Nope, I've been home for a few hours now. I just don't spend all my spare time staring at Sleeping Beauty, unlike you two." A halo of golden hair came in to my view and then his grinning face was above me. He raised an eyebrow when he saw that I was awake.

"How rude. I do believe the fair maiden is supposed to _wait_ for Prince Charming to kiss her before she wakes up. You've put me out of a job. Oh well, I'm sure there are plenty of other girls who are _dying_ to kiss Me." he smirked as I pushed myself laboriously in to a sitting position while rolling my eyes.

"Whatever," I grumbled and massaged my temples lightly.

"Touchy. Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed," he laughed, but it didn't reach his eyes. I could see the worry there, even if he didn't admit that he was concerned. I dreaded the conversation that was to come, because I was sure the only emotion I would see in those amber eyes was pure hatred.

"No, it's just that my head is spinning."

The girl- Isabelle- seemed to come out of some brooding trance.

"Oh!" she exclaimed before striding to the dresser beside my bed and picking up a small cup of a foul looking pale liquid. She smiled warily at me and held it out.

"Our mentor told me to make you drink this when you woke up. It should help your headache."

I glared at the cup for a moment before taking it from her hands and downing it in one gulp. It tasted almost as foul as it looked. I gagged in disgust even though I felt the effects immediately.

"Okay, so that tasted like someone had thrown up in to the toilet and scooped it out with this cup."

Alec screwed his face up in distaste for my description.

"That's disgusting."

"My sentiments exactly." I ginned. Alec looked at me blankly for a long moment before turning away.

"Are you going to introduce us? And maybe tell us why you were so freaked out yesterday?" Isabelle asked Jace loudly, tossing her oil black hair over her shoulder.

Jace snorted and jutted out his chin.

"I was not freaked out. Nothing freaks me out."

"But when you brought her in you were-"

Jace threw up his hands angrily, casting me a quick glance. "Enough. Clary, this is Alec and Isabelle Lightwood; my brother and sister. Brother and sister, this is Clary. Everyone, I am Jace Wayland, but of course you already knew that."

I smiled weakly at the siblings before remembering something Isabelle had just said.

"Wait, what do you mean 'so freaked out yesterday'? I can't have been asleep for an entire day."

"Over a day, actually. I brought you here at one thirty yesterday. Its four fifteen now, which means you've been asleep for almost twenty seven hours. Congratulations- you beat Alec's record by… about thirty minutes? Yeah, that sounds about right. Tough break, Alec." Jace said with a wistful smile. Alec shook his head, apparently embarrassed.

"Oh," was all I could think of to say. An awkward silence filled the room for an extremely long moment before Isabelle cleared her throat, placing her hands on her hips.

"So, Clary. You promised me some answers yesterday and now seems as good a time as any to-" Jace began but Isabelle cut over him.

"No! There will be no talking yet. Boys, get out. I have some business to attend to with Clary. Go eat carbs, or whatever it is you two do for fun." She said with unwavering authority. I looked at her quizzically but she simply flashed me a winner smile.

"Izzy…" Jace warned, but she shook her head.

"Out. Now. Before I set Max on the two of you."

The boys laughed unwillingly and headed to the door, leaving me alone with Isabelle. Jace turned around and shrugged his shoulders half apologetically, half amused before he rounded the corner, leaving me with a sinking feeling of nerves in the pit of my stomach. What had I just been entered in for?

I slowly turned back to her, rearranging my face so I looked somewhat okay with the idea of being alone with her. Her smile was radiant, but the devious twinkle in her eyes gave her away. Demons I could handle. Hell, even Jonathon was manageable, but sixteen year old girls? They were in a completely different ball park.

I swallowed. Hard.

* * *

"Who's Max?" Clary asked curiously as she squirmed in her seat. I set my self down on the end of her bed, crossing my legs so I was comfortable.

"He's my little brother. The little twerp could talk anyone to death. He gets it from Alec, don't you think?" I said seriously. Clary lifted her eyebrows but didn't say anything.

"Anyway. I wanted to talk to you about something extremely serious. Honestly, this is a subject my brothers take far too lightly, and it irritates me like hell." I said, looking straight in to her green eyes with my own jet black stare. She leaned forward a little, as though she was saying 'I'm listening'.

"Okay… I wanted to talk to you about your clothes."

"Excuse me?"

"Your clothes. I want to talk to you about them."

"Um… okay? What about my clothes?" the girl asked uncertainly, as if she didn't know they were hideous.

"I took the liberty of burning them. Honest, that sweater made me want to hurl."

Clary's mouth fell open and her hands tightened on the crisp white sheets that matched the white silk Victoria's Secret camisole/short combo I'd made my mom put her in when she'd arrived.

"You burned my clothes?" Clary asked quietly. I nodded with a smile.

"Yup, but don't worry. I got your sizes and skipped school today so I could go shopping and buy you some new stuff. It wasn't too much bother; the novelty of going to school wore off by last period yesterday. It was just so… _mundane_."

"_You burned my clothes?_" she asked again, her voice scarily calm. She was looking at me like a lioness that was about to tear apart her prey. I backed away a little, grabbing for the handle of my whip.

"Hey, calm down. They were covered in all kinds of crap. I did you a favour."

"But what am I going to wear?" she almost screamed at me. She swung her legs out of the bed and stalked towards me, pointing her finger at my chest.

"I told you, I bought you some new-"

"That sweater belonged to my mother." She said quietly, her voice cracking at the end of the sentence. I waved her off impatiently. We didn't have time for sob stories. The deed was done and if I wanted to get her cleaned up and presentable _before_ my parents and Hodge had a hernia, we'd have to move now.

"I don't care if it belonged to the Queen of England; it doesn't stop it from being vile. Now calm down and come with me so you can take a shower. You smell like a drain."

"Charming," Clary said dryly, but she did seem to perk up a little at the mention of a shower. I motioned for her to follow me and, thankfully, she did. I led her towards the residential block and told her to wait for a moment while I grabbed a bag of toiletries from my room. When I came back out she was yanking uncomfortably at the pyjama shorts. I smiled in satisfaction.

"They're not supposed to be any longer than that. Stop pulling. You're room is just down here."

When we entered her room, Clary just stared. A tiny crease appeared between her eyes as she took in the clean white walls, the bare stone floor and the tiny bed pushed in to the corner of the room.

"This is mine?" she asked me quietly.

"Yeah. For as long as you want it. Feel free to do what you want with it, though. It's far too _white_, don't you think."

Clary shook her head.

"It's practical."

I snorted then. She sounded exactly like Jace.

"Whatever. The bathroom is through that door. Here's some stuff to clean up with. There's a razor in there, too. You do know how to use one, right?" I asked, not quite joking. She rolled her eyes with a tiny smile.

"I am a girl, Isabelle. The concept of shaving is not a mystery to me."

"Good." I grinned before I shoved her towards the door, throwing some underwear and a bathrobe in to her hands. "Don't be long! The oldies want to see you."

* * *

Half an hour later I stared back at my reflection in the mirror at the tiny dressing table, barley recognising the face that frowned back at me. Isabelle had brushed, yanked and curled my hair until it sat just right; flowing down my back in elegant loose curls. She'd forced me to sit still while she applied a light dusting of makeup, even though I insisted that I didn't usually wear it.

"You have great skin," she'd said whilst dabbing a makeup sponge on my forehead, "but everyone can do with a little concealer sometimes."

I hadn't dared to argue when she'd attacked me with mascara, fearing that I'd lose one of my eyes if she was provoked. When she'd finished she ordered me to put on the clothes she'd laid out on the bed. I protested vehemently against the miniskirt and tank top and after five minutes of furious argument she agreed to let me look through the bags of clothes (there were at least ten) to pick my own outfit, as long as she could give the overall approval.

In the end I settled with a pair of dark blue skinny jeans and a plain white top with three quarter length sleeves. I shoved my feet in to a pair of Chuck Taylor's, much to Isabelle's dismay, and stood still while she compromised by hanging a long golden locket from my neck. I finished by shoving my stele in to the back pocket of my jeans

"How much did you actually spend today?" I asked her curiously as I walked by her side through the Institute. She laughed airily and the noise sent chills down my spine.

"I learnt a long time ago that if I thought too much about how much I was spending, I'd be a very depressed girl. It's better if you don't know. It's even better if mom doesn't know…" she added thoughtfully. She did have a point. I probably didn't want to know how much she'd spent.

"Anyway, we're here."

I looked over at her as we paused at a set of huge doors.

"Where exactly is 'here'?"

"The kitchen. My parents wanted to talk to you in the library, but Jace managed to convince them that you'd be starving. Discussions always go better over food anyway, don't you think? We ordered in."

"Um… okay. But I'm not all that hungry." My stomach picked that exact moment to growl angrily and I felt the traitor blush creep in to my cheeks. Isabelle glanced at me knowingly before making her way in to the room.

When I entered, everyone seemed to stop what they were doing to look directly at me. My blush deepened at the attention.

Jace was sat beside Alec and a smaller dark haired boy who I assumed to be Max at the huge table in the centre of the room, already shoving noodles in to his mouth. He looked at me with a grin, tipping his head in what I thought might have been appraisal. I rolled my eyes again- something I had found my self doing a lot around these people- and followed Isabelle to take a seat opposite the boys. Max stared at me the whole time, his eyes huge and bright. I looked back and smiled as he pushed a box of food towards me, blushing.

"Hi. I'm Max." he said quietly.

"And you must be Clarissa?" someone- a woman- said from the doorway. I spun on my chair to see and older man and woman striding in to the kitchen. They took seats at the heads of the table, each looking at me with unmarked curiosity and apprehension.

"Yes." I said simply.

"My name is Maryse, and this is my husband Robert. We run the institute and you've already met our children."

"Thank you for letting me stay here. You have a wonderful family." My voice was uncharacteristically polite. It reminded me of how I spoke when I was talking too…

I pushed the name out of my mind. It reminded me too much of the conversation that would take place any minute.

"That's very kind of you to say. I'm sorry to throw you straight in at the deep end Clarissa, but what exactly happened to you? Jace wouldn't tell anyone." she shot her adopted son a look of dissatisfaction but he just grinned through another huge mouthful of food.

I braced myself in my seat, suddenly hyper aware of the eyes boring in to me like scans on an x-ray. I no longer felt hungry and pushed the box of noodles back in to middle of the table.

"I only have one thing to ask before I begin; please let me explain myself before you jump to conclusions."

The people at the table all nodded and waited for me to go on. I took a deep breath, and started my explanation.

"I've lived in Idris my entire life with my Mother and Father and my brother. I thought we were all happy; my parents seemed to be more in love than they ever had, I got on well with my brother. We were _parabati_ since I was nine and he was ten. We trained together every day. I thought I knew him like the back of my hand. I thought I knew them _all_ like the back of my hand. I was deluded.

"A little over two years ago, my father started acting strange. He would take my brother away for long periods of time and when they'd return, they'd sit together and talk in whispers, ignoring my mother and me like we didn't exist. My mother confronted my father about what was going on, but he waved her off; said she was paranoid. My brother treated me like I was a piece of filth- like he was better than me. I tried to ignore it but as time went by it got harder and harder to ignore. Strangers would turn up at the house and groups of them would lock themselves in our basement for days at a time and when they'd come back up they'd all look at me with this strange hunger in their eyes. I grew uneasy.

"It wasn't long after the groups of people started to arrive that I figured out I was different. I was sat drawing in the living room and I'd sketched something that came in to my head randomly. It was a rune. I stared at it for a long time, wondering what it meant, and then the rune came to life on the page. It set my sketch pad on fire. My father saw it all and it was like some kind of trigger in his head. That night he invited me to one of the meetings. My brother hated that. He wanted to be the favourite- he wanted to believe he was one up on me with our father, but he was pushed aside. My father fawned over me, telling me I would bring greatness to the world some day. His talk scared my mother. She ran- abandoned us all. I was heartbroken and bitter, and part of me wanted revenge. My father seemed to want that too.

"Over the next year I involved myself completely in my fathers work. He did tests, he sent me out looking for things, and I did everything he wanted because I was loyal to him. That was until I found out what he was planning- what he'd done to me and my brother. Over the years my talents had increased massively, and I could create portals; any kind of rune I could imagine. I planned my escape in secret, and last week I finally did it. I rode out of Idris, created a portal and came here, to New York. I've been trying to find my mother; there were rumours she'd exiled her self here. I knew my father would send someone after me, but I had no idea he would go so low as to send my own brother. That's who attacked us, Jace. My brother Jonathon. I can't let them catch me otherwise we'll all be in danger."

I took a deep breath and looked around the table. They were all completely silent for a moment before Isabelle spoke up.

"Wait a second… you said you could create _new runes_? That's impossible."

"I saw her do it. It's true." Jace said quietly, setting his chopsticks down on the table and glaring at them.

"But that's not allowed. The only runes we can use are in the Grey Book. New runes go against the teachings!" Alec said heatedly, glaring at me as though I was something disgusting. I remained silent.

"I think," Robert Lightwood spoke for the first time since he entered the room, "that this is not the issue at the heart of the matter. Clarissa, you say your father is planning something and it can put us all in danger? Tell us, who exactly is your father?"

I was about to answer when I heard the doors open behind me. I turned around, and the sight I saw stunned me in to complete silence.

"So it's true. Welcome to New York, Clarissa Morgenstern."

Behind me I heard a series of sharp intakes of breath at the sound of my name, but I didn't bother to try and defend my self. I would have told them sooner or later anyway. My eyes were trained on the man in front of me, appraising him coolly so I could disguise my shock. It felt like a few minutes had passed before I found my voice again.

"_Hodge?_"

* * *

**A/N: So what did you think? Too long? Too boring? Any questions? Reviews are good for the soul :)**


	3. Hodge

**A/N: as much as I keep wishing to be, last time I checked I'm **_**still**_** not Cassandra Clare. All characters and familiar plot ideas belong exclusively to her. **

**I just want to say thank you to the people who reviewed; they made me smile. Special 'thank you's' to Quiet Girl Blue for pointing out some issues with my tenses (I promise I'll work on that!) and LOLHaily for telling me she'll kill me if I didn't update soon. I took it as a compliment. So thanks! :D **

**Just want to put a bit of a language warning up for this story. I didn't realise I actually swore so much in my writing but…**

**Aaaaanywho. On with the show…**

* * *

"_What_ did he just say her name was?"

"You can't be serious…"

"Morgenstern as in _Valentine _Morgenstern? Who knew that mentalist had kids? Well, that's fucked up. Shit…"

"Jace. Language."

"Pardon my French."

"Mom, I don't understand…"

"We have to get her out. Hand her to the Clave."

"_Alec! Manners!_"

"Oh, come on! You were all thinking it. She's dangerous. She could be a spy!"

"Alec," I said quietly, not taking my eyes away from Hodge, "I assure you that if I was a spy I would place myself in the heart of the Clave instead of an institute hours away from Idris."

"That's exactly what a spy would say. You're helping your father. Admit it!"

I glanced at him, daring him with my eyes to say more. His chin jutted out defiantly.

"Alec Lightwood. If you do not be quiet this instant-" Maryse began, but Isabelle clipped him around the back of the head before their mother could complete what would have most likely been an empty threat. He shot them both hard looks before turning on me with a glare. I looked in to his icy frown for a moment before turning my attention back to Hodge.

He looked basically the same as always; thin to the extreme, dark hair streaked with silver- though, admittedly, there was a lot more silver there than he'd had when I'd last seen him- and a gaunt face with a beaky nose in the centre. He looked far more exhausted than I remembered. Dark circles were etched beneath his bespectacled eyes, his skin looked almost grey and he seemed to hunch over with the manner of someone who could no longer handle the strains of walking. He leaned against the doorway, surveying me with his overly attentive, bird-like eyes.

For a moment, I was certain I must be staring at a ghost.

The way his mouth turned down and his eyebrows furrowed made me certain he knew the kind of thoughts that were running rampage through my head. He grimaced and took a step forward, holding out his arms as though asking for mercy.

"Clarissa. I know what you must be thinking. I can explain." he said in a tired, raspy voice.

"You can?" I retorted sharply, losing all interest of the audience behind us. They were a minor inconvenience at the moment. "That's great, Hodge. It's an explanation I'd _love_ to hear. He told us you were_ dead_."

"In his eyes, I don't doubt that I was as good as."

I shook my head, frowning.

"So, what? You're obviously still alive so tell me what happened."

"Wait a second," Jace chimed in, his voice cool and indifferent. I whirled around so I could look at him. He held an unsheathed seraph blade in his hand and I couldn't help but notice how natural it looked being there; like it was a permanent, lethal extension to his arm. Remembering the mixed reactions to my identity, my hand automatically wandered to the stele in my back pocket.

"How does Valentine Morgenstern's daughter know our tutor?" he asked, raising a commanding eyebrow at me. I flinched as he spat out my fathers name with venom. He probably held me in the same regard. It didn't escape my notice that he'd avoided saying my name; I was now nothing more than Valentine Morgenstern's daughter. After learning of my father's intentions, I couldn't say I truly held that against Jace.

"He taught me and Jonathon until he… until he died two years ago." I replied quietly, avoiding his eyes. I no longer felt like Jace trusted me, like he had promised in the clearing. The strange connection I felt with him was still there, but he regarded me with an attitude that bordered on hostility.

Jace frowned. "He came here two years ago from Idris. And, obviously, he's not dead. Unless, of course, you're implying he is a ghost, in which case you're an idiot. _Everyone_ knows ghosts aren't real."

"I am not a ghost," Hodge answered, a wry smile gracing his face. It made him look at least five years younger.

"Then tell me what happened." I demanded, my heart in my throat.

"Are you sure? You would have me tell it here in front of a family you do not know? There are things about what I am going to tell you that even you don't know, Clary."

I nodded without hesitation.

"Yes, I'm sure. Jace helped save me yesterday and his family gave me somewhere to heal. They deserve to know the truth. It's the least I can offer them after the help they have given me. At the very least the information might be useful to the Clave."

Hodge looked at me for a long time with hard eyes before he seemed to find what he was looking for. He nodded once and took the seat I'd previously occupied. I remained rooted to the spot. I didn't feel I belonged in the circle they had created now that the truth of my entire ordeal would finally, after years of hardship and bitterness, be out.

"Very well, Clarissa. I hope you understand what the consequences may be."

"I do."

* * *

"I was only a young man when I first met Valentine. We were put together as training partners and quickly became friends. I was in awe of him; he was talented, intelligent and handsome on top of that. I suppose you could say I was jealous, but really I was just honoured that someone so great would pick me as their friend. He had a way about him that made it entirely too easy to fall in line beside him and do whatever it was that he asked. People fawned over him like he was a kind of God, and I'm sure now that he deluded himself in to believing he really was.

"Even at the age of fifteen he was highly ambitious. He would often speak of how he wanted to be the greatest Shadowhunter in history- that he wanted to be the one responsible for destroying all of demonkind. We all believed he could do it because he really was that talented. I'm sure you agree, Maryse and Robert, that he was something special."

Robert nodded unwillingly, much to Alec's annoyance. He scoffed and I jabbed him sharply in the side.

"Stop it, Jace," he growled under his breath but I ignore him and turned to his father.

"He was a highly skilled fighter." Robert said quietly, his wife nodding with solemn agreement. "We all wanted to be associated with him. Watching him in battle was like witnessing a masterpiece in the making."

Hodge inclined his head silently before he continued on with his story.

"Valentine engrossed himself so fully in the destruction of demons that by the time he was eighteen I was sure he could think of nothing else but all of that seemed to change when he met your mother, Clary. She was beautiful and had a wit about her that balanced Valentine's somewhat crude nature, much like you." his eyes flicked momentarily in my direction before they landed back on Clary. She looked tiny leaning against the wall, her arms wrapped tightly around her torso. It was as if her carefully constructed barriers had stated to fault and crack, leaving behind nothing but the scared girl she really was. Where was the girl I'd met only yesterday? The feisty red head that hadn't even blinked as we held each other at knife point seemed to have disappeared altogether. I wanted to laugh out loud as I looked at her now. How could the girl across the room possibly be Valentines flesh and blood?

"As soon as he laid eyes on her, it was as if he had forgotten everything he'd ever stood for. He stopped Shadowhunting and they married only four months later. Valentine was excited at the prospect of having children to teach the art of Shadowhunting too, but his dream was cut short when his own mother and father were killed by Downworlders in England.

"After that, Valentine grew brooding. He returned to Shadowhunting, throwing himself recklessly in to battles as though there was nothing to lose. He would always come out unscathed, of course, but it hurt Jocelyn to see him like that. He began to turn secretive with her, but he told me everything.

"Valentine was sent mad by revenge for his parent's deaths. He became obsessed with the idea of ridding the world not only of demons, but of downworlders too. Valentine despised the Clave for signing the treaties with the downworlders and claimed they were not standing true to their birthrights. Downworlders are part demon too- so why shouldn't they die? He told me of a plan he had been creating over the months since his parents died.

"Before he found out that Jocelyn was pregnant, he'd drained ichor from a greater demon and placed it in a small vile so he could experiment on it. Intending on feeding it to his now pregnant wife, his plan was to create a half human, half demon hybrid that could tackle the demons and Downworlders with ease. The child would have the power of the Shadowhunters as well as the abilities of the other. Being the pushover I was, I was convinced of his idea. His ability to deliver a speech was second to none. I was his pawn after the first sentence though I'm not entirely sure I could have refused him even if I had dared to disagree.

"Over the pregnancy, I assisted in feeding Jocelyn the ichor with every meal. She suspected nothing. After all, she was too tired most of the time to notice what it was we were feeding her. She had every reason to trust me. I was harmless."

"Hodge!" Maryse gasped in to her hands, looking sickened. She shook her head and ordered Max to go to his room, which he did only after some hefty bribery on mine and Alec's part. That kid drives a seriously hard bargain; I wouldn't see junk food for weeks.

"You helped poison Clary's mom?" Isabelle asked quietly after the door had closed behind her young brother. Hodge frowned at the floor and Clary seemed in a daze. She shook her head repeatedly from side to side, her small hands balled in to tight fists at her sides. I swallowed down the unfamiliar and unnecessary twinge of guilt I suddenly felt in my chest.

"You could define it as that, but when Jonathon was finally born, he looked and acted like a completely normal baby. Valentine feared that his plan had not succeeded. He gave up on the idea, until he heard news from his wife a year later that she was pregnant again. He got it in to his head that he was using the wrong method- that fighting fire with fire was not the way to go. This time he fed Jocelyn the blood of an angel he had managed to capture. Again, you showed no abnormal signs when you were born, Clary, and he finally gave up on the idea."

"Whoa, wait one second." I frowned, throwing my hand up in exasperation, "What do you mean _the blood of an angel_? How on earth did Valentine get his hands on an angel?"

"Angel blood runs through my veins," she said in a monotone, "Its how I can create new runes."

"I have no idea as to how he came across the angel but I saw it with my own eyes. However, I think it is best, if you do not mind, that we leave questions for later."

"Whatever," Isabelle, Alec and I said at the same time with varying degrees of irritation. Hodge ran a hand through his hair and began again.

"It wasn't until Jonathon came in to his powers two years ago that the vision in Valentine's mind sparked again. I'm sure you can all figure out that the correlation of Jonathon coming in to his demonic powers and the start of the attacks on the Clave and downworlders match up perfectly. In Valentine's eyes he had created the perfect weapon. No one outside of his elite group of friends knew that he and Jocelyn had any children, so the Clave would never suspect the pair of you as part of his plans. I watched Valentine torture downworlders to death; mow down Shadowhunter after Shadowhunter in order to do it, and that was when I decided it was time to get out of the whole ordeal. I ran, much like you did Clary, to New York and took up residence as a tutor here in the Institute. A year later, I sent your mother a letter telling her everything and warning her to escape Idris with you; to come here to New York where you could both be protected. She wrote back straight away informing me that you too had come in to your powers and Valentine had made his move. I told her to run, and that you would follow sooner or later. You were never as ruthless as your brother, Clarissa, though no less talented. I knew you wouldn't stand Valentine's regime for long. And here you are."

We all sat in a stony silence, unable to break the lull. A thousand questions burned on the tip of my tongue but I felt out of place asking them. She leaned against the furthest wall from us, gripping her chest as though her soul was cracking in to tiny pieces and I couldn't help feel a flare of sympathy for her. I knew I shouldn't- she was that killer's daughter and probably no different to him but… if that was true, would she have attacked her brother like she had?

"You're the reason my mother left?" Clary whispered a long time after Hodge had finished speaking. I gripped my seraph blade tightly in my fist, willing myself not to explode with anger for Clary's father. I had never met Valentine- I'd only heard of his co-ordinated and brutal attacks over the last few years. Not only had he killed downworlders, but Shadowhunters too. At least fifty had fallen by his hands in the last year alone. I hated him with my whole heart, but did that change my opinion on Clary?

"Yes." Hodge answered and a chill ran down my spine. I knew it was impossible for Hodge to have read my mind, but his answer matched perfectly to the question I had mentally asked. It took me a few seconds to realise he was answering Clary.

I watched a single tear roll down her cheek before something in the air changed. Her shoulders locked in place and her back went ram-rod straight. There was a malicious glint in her huge green eyes that told me she was going to-

"You bastard!" she screamed as she launched her self at Hodge and tackled him to the ground with a resounding thump. We were all out of our seats in a second, pulling on Clary's arms with the vein hope of dislodging her from the older man, but we didn't have much success. She clung on to him with passionate force.

"You sent my mom away! It's your fault that I was left there all alone! It's you're fault I thought she'd left me behind because she didn't love me! IT'S YOUR FAULT HE GOT THE CHANCE TO TURN ME IN TO HIS PET! It's your fault! Everything is your fault!" she wailed through her quick falling tears. With every other word she took a new swipe for his face, her tiny hands balled in to deadly fists. Hodge's face was already clouding with bruises, and a trail of crimson leaked from the corner of his mouth but he took the beating without defending himself.

"He turned me in to a killer! I murdered innocent people because he told me they killed you and my grandparents! He told me they were trying to kill my mom but all the time it was just so he could meet his own twisted means! And you helped poison my mom! You helped make me and Jonathon what we are. I'm a weapon because of you. _I'm a freak!_" she howled as I finally managed to dislodge her from Hodge's defenceless body. He was curled up on the ground in a pitiful bloody mess.

"I'm sorry, Clarissa." He whispered through a mouthful of blood.

"Sorry isn't good enough." she said in a low, feral growl.

Clary kicked out against my hold but I managed to drag her away from my tutor. I scooped her up in to my arms and carried her out of the kitchen and in to the hallway without too much difficulty. She was still screaming through her strangled, grief filled sobs when I kicked open the door to her new bedroom and placed her lightly on her bed. She curled up in to a ball and continued crying as though she hadn't shed a tear in years.

Quietly, I walked to the door and flipped the lock, tracing a privacy rune for good measure.

I didn't turn to face her for a long time. I didn't think about anything in particular- my head was too rattled to even attempt to make sense of what we'd been told in the last hour or so. I stood with my head resting against the cool wood of the door and listened to Clary's fading sobs until there was nothing left of them but a faint sniff and the odd hiccup.

"Jace,"

I started at the sound of my name coming from her mouth but not enough to let her know she'd scared me. I turned slowly, arranging my face in to an expression that I hoped looked impassive. Clary was huddled at the very top of the bed, her arms wrapped protectively around her drawn up knees. Her eyes were wide and red and her cheeks were stained with tears and black lines of mascara, but she still managed to look beautiful.

I quickly berated myself for thinking that, because I never, ever described girls as beautiful. Girls were hot, not _beautiful._ With an inward sigh, I met her eyes.

"Jace, I'm sorry."

_Sorry for what?_ I wanted to ask, but the sentence was caught on my tongue. I could only nod my head awkwardly and take a seat on the chair.

"I understand if I need to leave. What my father has done… what my entire family have done is unspeakable but I promise you I'm not helping him."

"Go to sleep, Clarissa." I said softly, keeping my glaring eyes fixed on my sneakers. I heard her sigh and shuffle on the bed.

It wasn't long before she was a sleep. I stood quietly and walked to her bedside, letting the back of my palm brush a warm path across her cheek. For some reason I couldn't bring my self to turn and walk away without letting my hand linger for a long moment. The bitter taste of finality clung to my tongue already, and I couldn't even start to explain why it made my chest ache.

_Get a grip, Jace,_ I mentally chided my self; _she's the enemy's daughter. Could you get any more Romeo and Juliet?_

With one last look, I turned on my heel and walked out of her room; out of the institute and in to the cold night air with only one thought on my mind.

I was going to find her brother.

* * *

**So, I'm sorry if this chapter was a bit heavy- I promise there will be action instead of epic explanations in the next chapter! What do you think so far? Does everything make sense? It does in my head, obviously, but getting it down on the page was hard. Don't hesitate to ask questions!**

**Oh and this is for Lost-in-Thought-15: Kismet means fate or fortune, I promise it's not just a random word :D! **


	4. I Can Handle This

**A/N still don't own TMI. Bad times, right? **

**I would have had this chapter up earlier in the week but I had all kinds of nasty deadlines to think about, and I was attacked with a killer cold. Thanks to the people who reviewed the last chapter!**

**Wonder how Jace will cope against Jonathon… :) chapter's a long'n so you might want a tea break in the middle of it or something, I don't know :) **

* * *

My legs moved of their own accord. I paid no attention whatsoever to where I was heading, but I had the vague sense in the back of my mind that I was going in the right direction. Gut instinct was, after all, the only thing I had to rely on when trying to find someone who probably didn't want to be found. The one thing I was truly aware of was the warm feel of my seraph blade in the palm of my hand. I gripped it tightly, revelling in the tingling heat and the feel of the angel engravings on the hilt as they imprinted in to my skin.

The night was cold- too cold for mid September. For a moment I felt a shot of regret run through my body as I thought of the jacket I'd tossed on to my bed earlier, but I wasn't a stranger to the bitter chill of New York winters. This was nothing compared to the temperatures we'd see come December.

I'd been walking for what felt like hours before I felt a sharp pain in my head. I came to a less than graceful halt, glaring at the metal gate I'd just walked in to. I cursed under my breath and rubbed my forehead angrily as I looked around the area to make sure no one had seen one of my rare acts of clumsiness.

_Thank the angel_, I thought to my self when I couldn't spot anyone. The '_who put that there?_' line that had been resting on my tongue, just in case, would have done nothing but bring me more embarrassment. Only a girl would have found it endearing, but which girls hung around a place like this at midnight? The only ones I could think of were Shadowhunters like Isabelle and…

_Clary. Right. _

I shook my head, cursing internally. Since when had my life become so complicated? Oh, that's right. Since that redheaded bombshell charged in to it with seraph blades a-blazing. I wasn't use to caring. I was Jace Wayland. I looked out for number one and thought about others second. That's how it had always been, so I couldn't understand why I had charged out of the Institute, drawn all kinds of runes on my body and mentally prepared myself for a fight with the lunatic brother of a girl I'd known a grand total of a day and a half.

I wanted to hate her for making me care- for making me weak. But not once since I'd witnessed her full on breakdown in the kitchen had it crossed my mind to hate her for who she was; who her family was. She insisted that she'd done some terrible things, but what did that matter? People made mistakes all the time. Hell, as much as I hate to admit it even I've made mistakes but strangely enough, protecting Clarissa Morgenstern didn't feel like it would be one of them.

I looked around at my surroundings properly, frowning when I read the inscription above the gate.

_St Xavier's High School? Great. I come on a midnight walk to find Clary's brother and I wind up back at the mundane school I was trying to escape from when this whole mess started. Fan-freaking-tastic. _

I kicked a rock angrily, running my hands through my hair. I'd spent god knows how long trying to find Jonathon and all I'd managed to do was bring my self back to this place.

_Wait… maybe…_

We'd last seen Jonathon in the small clearing just off campus. It kind of made sense that he'd stay there at least for a little while to see if Clary would come running back. I laughed softly to myself before I launched off the ground without another thought, jumping high enough that I would be able to propel myself forward and clear the top of the gate. As I passed over it, I felt like I was suspended in midair for a second before I allowed myself to drop freely to the ground. I landed on the balls of my feet like a cat and didn't sway on contact, even though the drop had been a good six meters. If I'd been any younger than seventeen, a victory fist pump would definitely have been in order right then but instead I shook my head and narrowed my eyes so I was sporting my game face. Jumping high was nothing new to me. It was just something I'd always been able to do.

It took me five minutes to find the clearing again in the dark. I walked with meticulously practiced caution; my steps were muffled by the silencing rune I'd drawn quickly as I left the safety of the Institute. I didn't think about the tightness in my chest or the bubble of fear that swelled within me, threatening to burst and take over. It was nothing but a nuisance that clouded my judgement.

When I finally I stepped through the trees, the first thing I saw was Clary's bench. In the dim moonlight I could only just make out the carefully scratched markings that made up her name, but it was definitely there. The clearing looked exactly the same as it had the day before, except-

"I knew someone would come find me. I didn't expect it to be you, though I suppose you have the right to be curious, given the circumstances…" a voice drawled from beneath a tree on the oppose side of the clearing. I gripped my seraph blade tightly in my fisted hand as Jonathon stepped forward. He gripped a witchlight rune-stone in his hand and it illuminated his pale face eerily. Now I took the time to look at him, I could see how he resembled Clary. They had the same nose and the same almond shaped eyes, but where Clary's hair was as red as a burning flame, his was pale blonde. His lips held a tight, menacing smirk which I was sure Clary would never be able to achieve.

"Let me guess; my _darling_ little sister told you all about her _tragic_ little past and her _evil_ little family and you've come to kill me for a being a bad, bad person?" his voice was dry, almost bored. He rolled a leaf idly between the thumb and forefinger of his free hand while he looked me right in the eye. His were the colour of pitch.

"Something along those lines," I said coolly. He laughed and whispered something under his breath that I couldn't make out while he crushed the leaf between his fingers. I watched the crumbled pieces sail to the ground like ash.

"I figured as much. She never could keep her mouth shut."

"Tell me what you want with her." I said evenly. The seraph blade was still tight in my hand and I was more aware of it than I had ever been.

He raised an amused eyebrow and said "Tell me why you care."

I didn't know what to say, but I refused to let him know that. I shrugged and said "Shadowhunters are sworn to protect their kind. So that's what I'm doing."

"There are some things you really don't want to get involved in. This is one of those things. I suggest you walk away now, before my father figures out-."

"Not a chance." I snapped, cutting off the rest of his sentence.

"Well if you did come here to kill me, you can't. Not right now. Not tonight."

I laughed loudly, raising my seraph blade so it was in line with his heart even though he stood a good five paces away.

"And why not, Jonathon?"

He tilted his head to the side, grinning.

"I didn't realise we were on fist name terms. What was it my sister called you yesterday? Chase? Mace? Place…?" he teased.

"_Jace,_" the word came out through my teeth in a low growl. He smiled widely and held out a hand as though in greeting. I looked at it like he'd just offered me a tray of grub worms. After a long moment, he pulled his hand back and ruffled his hair.

"Well Jace, in answer to your question you can't kill me because I have information you want, even if you don't know you want it yet."

"What the hell are you talking about?" I asked. My eyebrows pulled together in confusion.

"I'm talking about things even my sister doesn't know. There was another, you know? In between Clarissa and myself."

"Another what?"

"Another experiment."

"So what? That has nothing to do with me." I spat, taking a step closer to him. He didn't back away or move to draw a weapon. In fact, the only thing he did was smile wickedly at me, his black eyes blazing in the glow of the witchlight.

"It seems, Jace Wayland, that even Gabriel sometimes forgets he can fly." he chuckled.

The hand holding my weapon dropped slightly as I sucked in a breath through my clenched teeth.

"How did you know my name?"

"All good students do their homework. Now run along back to my sister. I'm sure she's missing her feathery companion."

"I'm not going anywhere until you're lying on the floor with my blade sticking out your chest." I hissed. Everything Jonathon was saying seemed to be in riddles, or some kind of secret code that I hadn't been clued in to yet. It was irritating.

"Now, now, Jace. That's not a very nice way to speak to your elders, is it? You should take it back before I get angry." He patronised, but there was a definite edge of rage in his tone. I could feel my blood starting to boil in anger.

"Go back to hell where you belong, demon." I fumed before charging towards him, my seraph blade poised and ready to kill. I'd barley had one swipe at him before he knocked me backwards with so much force that I flew straight in to a tree trunk on the opposite side of the clearing. I lay crumpled on the floor, completely winded and gasping for air, and pretty certain that I was bleeding in more than one place. I spit blood out on to the grass beneath me and wiped my mouth angrily with the back of my hand. I pushed myself back on to my feet, ignoring the fact I was swaying gently from side to side.

Jonathon stalked towards me as though he was a wild animal hunting its prey and the look on his face told me that he was feeling murderous. He flicked his hand absently and I found myself flying through the air again, the clearing turning in to a dark blur around me. I smashed to the ground at his feet and immediately retched. He towered over me and the look in his eye made me certain that he was laughing inwardly. He moved his feet away; like he was scared I would be sick on his shoes.

"You know what the best part is, Jace?" he asked me as he brought the toe of his boot to my ribs. The scream that escaped my lips didn't sound human.

"It's that I can say whatever I want to you and you're still clueless! You honestly have _no idea_ what's going on!" again, his foot made contact with my ribs and I heard a resounding crack through my moans of pain. I felt like my whole body was burning- like he'd somehow managed to set me on fire.

"Stop," I managed to say through a mouthful of blood. Jonathon's foot paused as he looked over me curiously.

"Had enough, _il mio Angelo_? Hmm… yes I think you're right. That's enough for today." He turned his back, leaving me beaten and broken on the floor. I couldn't feel any pain- my entire body felt numb; paralysed. Like earlier, the only thing I was truly able to feel was the warm glow of my seraph blade in my hand. How had it managed to stay there all this time?

Jonathon picked up a pack from the ground and slung it over his shoulder, smiling cheerfully.

"I have to leave now, unfortunately, but be sure to pass on my regards to Clarissa. No doubt she'll turn up soon. She has a habit of doing that. Let her know that father and I are _very _excited to see her again." he laughed, somewhat manically, as I fought to keep my heavy eyelids open.

"Stay away from her," I managed to whisper. He raised one eyebrow and took a step back towards me, his face full of pale recognition. It was like something had suddenly clicked in to place in his brain. A slow smile spread across his face.

"To love is to destroy, Wayland. It might be wise to remember that,"

And with that, Jonathon disappeared in to the trees. I followed his shadow until it was completely engulfed by the darkness.

Mist seemed to be clouding in my brain; thick and consuming. I was so tired that it became a chore to keep my eyes open any longer. All I wanted to do was sleep, and sleep for a very long time. The longer I tried to stay awake, the harder it became to breathe. My breaths came in short, shallow bursts so that nowhere near enough oxygen reached my brain.

As the darkness descended, I seemed to whisper a word. I heard it as though it had been said across a huge field- muffled and slightly distorted.

"Clary…"

* * *

_Clary… _

I jolted up in my bed, sweat beading on my forehead, making my hair damp. The dream I'd just woken from had been so vivid I was sure it must have been real. A golden angel had lain in a bloodied mess on the ground while a dark, distorted shadow with familiar maniac laughter stood over his beaten form. The angel had said my name, his voice brimming with pain, fear and need, just before he let out a strangled sigh and his soft golden light flickered out- completely extinguished. The way he'd said my name had broken my heart and scared me enough to pull me out of a dead sleep. I tried to catch my breath, but all I could see in front of me was the burning image of the angel's face. It was a face I would never be able to forget even if I tried because the face belonged to-

"Jace?" I called in to the empty room. I didn't really expect a reply, but the silence that greeted me was suffocating. Urgency consumed me as I threw myself out of bed. I wrenched open my bedroom door, not caring that I was barefoot and probably looked like crap, and sprinted towards Isabelle's bedroom. I tried the door handle, preying that she hadn't locked the room, but of course she had. I beat my scarred fist against the wooden door over and over again until I heard her shout.

"Shut up! Do you have _any idea_ what time it is?" her groggy voice said from inside the room. I tapped my foot impatiently while I waited for her to come out. She pulled the door open, a glare fixed on her beautiful face. For the first time since I'd met her, she didn't look pristine; her hair was a tangled mess, hanging limply past her shoulders. Her tiny pyjama set was twisted and wrinkled.

"_Clary?_" she said, exasperated, "What do you want? It's barley five am."

"Where's Jace?"

"Seriously? That's why you woke me up?"

"Isabelle. Where is he?"

She must have heard the urgency in my tone because she stiffened, folding her arms over her chest.

"How should I know? I haven't seen him since the pair of you left the kitchen last night. I presume he's in bed like any other _sane_ person. What's this about?"

"I need to find him. Where's his room?"

"I'm not taking you to his room, Clary. He'll be asleep, just like I was." she huffed and went to close the door in my face but I jammed my foot in the way before it could shut properly.

"What are you-?"

"Where is he?" I shouted. My voice echoed through the empty corridor. Isabelle looked at me for a long moment before stepping out of her room and shutting the door with a slam.

"His room is this way. Are you going to tell me what's going on?"

I ignored her, walking quickly at her side to his room. I wanted to run but she had no urgency about her. I couldn't blame her; she hadn't seen what I had.

"Here it is." She sighed and gently knocked on the door.

"Jace? Are you in there?" she was greeted with silence so she knocked a little louder.

"Jace if you're in there, come out now before Clary has a-"

I didn't let her finish her sentence. I pulled out the stele that was still in my back pocket from the night before and quickly drew an opening rune. There was a tense moment when I wasn't sure if it had worked but then the door fell slowly from its hinges and landed with a crash on the floor inside his room. I stepped over it impatiently, not listening to Isabelle's horrified gasp.

"He'll kill you for that," she said as she followed behind me.

"Let him try," I muttered while I looked around his room. It was completely pristine- the bed was even made. There was no way he'd slept in it that night.

"Oh yeah, I forgot for a moment. You're a Morgenstern. You can kill whoever you want."

I sucked in a breath through my teeth and turned to her slowly, gripping my stele tightly in my hand.

"And what, exactly, is that suppose to mean?"

She seemed to realise what she's said and I watched the colour bleed from her face. I tilted my head a little to the side, reminding my self of my brother. The thought sickened me.

"I didn't mean it." she said quickly. I shook my head, eyes narrow.

"If you knew what was good for you, you would never compare me to my family every again."

"What the hell is going on in here?"

My eyes swept past Isabelle and met icy blue. Alec looked at me carefully, his face scrunched up in confusion.

"Clary needs to find Jace." Isabelle said, turning to face her brother so she was stood between the pair of us. He stiffened.

"Why?"

She shrugged and glanced over her shoulder at me. I felt myself relax a tiny bit and directed my answer at her.

"I had a dream that he was dying."

Alec snorted.

"So you blow down his door and wake us up in the process, just because you're paranoid? I'm going back to bed."

"No! We have to find him. You don't understand. I've done this before…"

"Done _what_ before, Clary?" Isabelle asked, throwing her hands in to the air.

"I can't explain it. It's kind of like I'll have dream, and the dream will be a representation of something that has happened, or is going to happen. I need to find Jace and see if he is okay."

"Why do you care so much?" Alec asked, frowning, "It's not like you know him. It's not like _you_ have any right to want to protect him. Jace is a big boy. He's more than capable of looking after himself."

"Not if he goes after…"

_No. He wouldn't be that stupid._

"Not if he goes after _who_?"

The more I thought about it, the more plausible it seemed to be. I had no idea what would possess Jace to do it, but he seemed like the kind of person who would go off on a whim without thinking a plan through properly- or come up with a plan at all, for that matter.

"Jonathon." I whispered. Isabelle raised an eyebrow.

"Your brother? The half demon? Jace would never be so stupid. He would never go without us."

"I have to go help him." I said, pushing my way past Isabelle and Alec with more force than I intended. I ignored their shouts and ran through the corridors until I found my way back to my room. Once I was inside, I lashed my stele against the far wall, creating a portal rune. Within seconds the vortex had opened and I shoved on my shoes, wasting no more time before I dived through. I thought of nothing else but the only place other than the Institute we'd been together.

I felt the familiar feeling of travelling through empty space for only a second before I crashed down in a low crouch. I could feel grass beneath my finger tips, smell the greenery around me. I knew before I had even opened my eyes that I was in the right place. I'd spent a week hiding among these trees. Everything about the place was familiar.

My eyes opened cautiously. I was scared of what kind of sights might greet me, but the place seemed to be empty. I cast a glance over my shoulder, looking in to my room on the other side of the portal as if it was in another world. With a sigh, I stood up and straightened my top, casting my eyes attentively around the space. To begin with I was certain there was nothing, but then I spotted a glimpse of that all too familiar gold in the tall grass near the edge of the trees and my heart began hammering madly, like the rapid motion of a humming birds wings.

"Jace!" I shouted as I ran towards him. He was curled up in a ball, eyes closed and completely covered in blood. His face was clouded with bruises, and I was sure his entire body would be covered in them too. Jonathon always liked to leave a mark or ten.

Gingerly, I brought my shaking hand down to his neck, panicking. It took me a second to find the right spot, but I eventually felt a weak pulse beating beneath my fingertips and I let out a long, relieved sigh. He was badly injured, but at least he was still alive. I brushed his dirty hair back from his face and raised my stele to his forearm. My wrist flicked and flowed expertly as I traced the intricate vines and twists of a revival rune I'd created not long after I came in to my powers. The effects were almost instant.

Jace groaned quietly as his eyes slowly fluttered open. I watched him quietly as he struggled in to consciousness, moaning and cussing quietly under his breath. After a few moments he tested his joints, sucking in a breath through his teeth as he moved his chest, and pushed himself up to a sitting position. He rubbed his black eyes with his fists, swaying gently.

"Worst nights sleep. Ever." He growled thickly. I snorted sarcastically under my breath and he looked up at me as though he'd only just realised I was there. As our eyes connected and I saw the shock and innocent denial hidden beneath the pain, I was washed over with a tidal wave of pure fury. I hadn't realised how angry I was that he'd gone after my brother until that very second because it had been smothered by my concern for his safety. Now I saw him lying in the grass, bloodied and bruised, but somehow still alive, there was no buffer for my anger.

"What the hell did you think you were doing, coming out here on your own? What the _hell_ was going through your stupid head?" I ranted, thrusting my hands on to my hips. He didn't speak, only stared.

"Seriously, Jace! Do you have a death wish?"

* * *

She screamed at me for almost five minutes but I didn't listen to a word of it. I was fascinated by the way her red hair was haloed by the frame of the rising sun, making it look like dancing flames as the wind tousled through the loose curls. She looked tired but extremely angry. I followed the trail of a single tear as it rolled down her face and guessed that she was also upset. Her emerald eyes shone with unshed tears, and she wiped the one that had escaped away furiously with the back of her hand.

"Do you have anything to say for yourself?" she shouted, and it broke me from my trance. To tell the truth, I would have preferred to stay in it because as soon as I was aware of anything other than her face, my entire body was in agony. Judging from the sharp pains in my chest, I had more than one broken rib. The giant bruise that was my body throbbed dully and I sucked in a pained breath. I felt sick to my stomach and, was it just me, or was the world spinning? I felt seriously light headed…

"I hurt like a bitch," I thought aloud. Clary huffed and dropped down to her knees, her face pulled in to a frown. She yanked her stele out of her jeans pocket and pointed it at me.

"Lie down." She growled.

I wondered briefly why she was so annoyed, but did as she said because the look on her face made me sure she wouldn't hesitate in pushing me to the ground if it came to that. I lay down in the grass, closing my eyes to stop the sky from swirling.

"Hold still," she ordered as she ran the tip of the stele down my shirt, exposing my chest. I couldn't help the half delirious smirk that appeared on my face.

"Y'know," I winced as she prodded the stele to my shoulder, "if you wanted to get me naked you should have just asked instead of setting up this whole elaborate scheme. You would have saved your self a lot of effort."

She rolled her eyes and shot me a sideways glance.

"Tell me. Do you always think with your manhood or is it just when you're being an asshat?"

I grinned painfully. "Asshat? What an overwhelmingly eclectic vocabulary you have."

She tapped her stele less than gently to my throat, her eyes mere slits.

"Don't test me, Wayland. I am seriously pissed at you right now."

I raised my eyebrows, feeling curious.

"I see that. But what I don't see is why."

"You went after my brother!" she hissed as she traced a healing rune on my chest.

"And? You want him to stop coming after you, don't you?" I asked. I knew she'd heard the faint trace of accusation in my voice because she threw down her stele and hugged her knees.

"Of course I do, but you could have died." She whispered.

"I could have, but I didn't."

"That doesn't matter. You went after him without telling me and had no idea what you were getting your self in too! Jonathon doesn't have any reservations about killing people- even Shadowhunters. He's not human like you are, Jace. Neither of us are. We're dangerous."

I frowned and picked her stele up from the ground and began tracing runes over my body angrily. I could feel the warm tingling of the _iratze_ taking effect. The sharp pain in my chest subsided as the bruising and swelling around the fractures disappeared. The breaks felt better too, but I would need Hodge to fix them up properly.

"I'm a lot stronger than you seem to think. I can handle my self against demon boy."

"So I can see." She muttered darkly, glaring at the bruises on my body.

"Whatever Clary. Can we talk about this later? I'm beat and I need proper medical attention. And maybe a foot rub."

She growled under her breath but stood up none-the-less. I tried to push my self up to my feet, but my ribs hurt so much that I winced and groaned with the pain of it, falling on to my back with a huff.

"Are you okay?" Clary asked quickly, her eyes wide and frightened.

"Just peachy." I said but my worlds were full of sarcasm. She grimaced a little and reached out towards me like she wanted to help.

"Do you need a hand?"

I eyed her offered hand incredulously before shaking my head.

"No. I can handle this."

She glared down at me with a mixture of hurt and annoyance and she pulled her hand back so she could stuff it in her jeans pocket.

"Fine." She said, her voice as crisp as leaves in the fall, "I assume you can handle finding the portal back to the institute then? Just try not to get in to anymore fight's on your way. Are you sure you can handle that, Wayland? I mean I know seven paces is a long way but…"

"You are definitely the most irritating person I have every met."

She flashed me a wry grin before storming over to the portal. She stepped through it gracefully, calling from her safe, warm bedroom in the Institute.

"Obviously you've never looked in the mirror."

* * *

**Sooooo Jace isn't in Clary's good books atm :) this chapter was inspired by an argument I recently had. I was so scared and upset that I couldn't see how annoyed I really was until I'd found the person… wasn't so fun in all fairness. **

**But yeah… opinions? Reviews are great :) oh and feel free to suggest stories or authors I should check out- I'll always review and give feedback and stuff. And I just like seeing how people mess with my favourite fictional characters! **


	5. A Crazy Little Thing Called

**A/N I am not Cassandra Clare. All familiar characters and creations belong to her. Except the plot of this fanfic. That's mine. **

**So I've finished my first semester at university! Hurrah! I had my last exam today and I think it went quite well. No one forgot their lines, which is ALWAYS a plus, so here's a big chapter in aid of me giving the finger to higher education. Hope you enjoy it.**

* * *

"…And I bet you don't even care about how worried we were when Isabelle told us about Clary's dream. You acted like a stupid, immature child today, Jonathon Wayland."

I discreetly flipped another finger up on my tally, trying and failing dismally not to roll my eyes. Maryse had called me a 'stupid immature child', or words to the same effect, eight times already in her rant which was, coincidentally, her fourth of the day. If she wasn't careful, I'd run out of fingers and have to start counting with my toes.

"You know I hate being called that." I said lazily, sinking back in to the fluffy white pillows of the bed I was doomed to sit in for the rest of the day. I closed my eyes lightly, because it was the only way I could stop the room from spinning. In truth, it was giving me motion sickness.

"What was in that God awful thing Hodge made me drink? I feel all kinds of high right now."

"It got rid of the pain, didn't it?" I nodded my head with a grimace and Maryse clicked her tongue impatiently, "Well stop complaining. You owe Clarissa an apology. I'll send her in."

"Why should I apologise to her? I was doing her a favour. If anything she should be in here now thanking me!" I objected with a frown. My adoptive mother raised a single thin eyebrow at me.

"This is not open for discussion, Jace. She'll be here in a few minutes."

I watched her retreating back until she disappeared around the corner of the infirmary, in to the dark corridor beyond, with what I knew would be a killer scowl on my face. I'd been home for at least six hours and all I'd got was an earful from everyone about how irresponsible I'd been. The only person who wouldn't talk to me was Clary. She hadn't spoken to me since we'd got back. I saw her briefly when I came through the portal, but then I was taken straight to the infirmary by Alec and Hodge. The glimpse I'd got of her before they had carried me away, half delirious, had been painful. She'd looked so small and fragile. Her eyes had been rimmed with red and her cheeks had been stained with glistening trails of tears. She'd looked broken; terrified.

But still, I had been trying to protect her by going after Jonathon. I could have easily turned my back on her and wrote her off as nothing but a Morgenstern, like Alec had. I could have ignored her cries for help and went back to my usual routine of killing demons and doing absolutely nothing else. But I didn't, and this was the thanks I was getting.

"Don't think too hard over there, Wayland. Your brain might implode." A dry voice said from the doorway. I turned my head sharply to see Clary leaning against the doorframe, the picture of ease in comfortable looking grey sweats and a black t-shirt. I could see through the façade, though. Beneath the cool, sarcastic exterior was a frightened girl who was running from her past. I knew the look in her eyes too well. I saw that stubborn ignorance every time I looked in the mirror.

"Very witty." I said, bored, and turned my head away from her. I heard the deep intake of breath she took from where I lay.

"Your mom said you had-"

"Maryse. She's not my mother."

"Okay, _Maryse_ said you have something to tell me."

"She was mistaken."

Clary sighed the word 'asshole' under her breath and stood up straight.

"Well in that case I'm leaving."

My heart pounded in my chest when I heard her say that. I looked at her with sharp, questioning eyes.

"Leaving to go where?"

"To my room? Where else would I be going? Hodge said I'm not allowed out of here for a few days. He doesn't think I'm _safe_." Her words were bitter. My eyebrows creased.

"Oh. You don't have to go, you know."

She laughed lightly and shook her head.

"You're impossible to figure out. I have no idea what you're thinking from one minute to the next."

"It's all part of my charm. Come in and take a seat instead of darkening my doorway. Or are you really a vampire? Do I have to invite you in?"

"You know fine well real vampires don't need to be-"

"I hereby give you, Clarissa Morgenstern, permission to enter this hallowed infirmary if you agree to give me that foot rub I asked for."

"I'll pass on the foot rub, but a chair sounds good." She snickered half heartedly.

She settled her self in the chair beside my bed and took a lock of her hair between her fingers, rolling and twirling it idly. For a second, she reminded me of her brother with that leaf.

"Maryse wants me to apologise." I said quietly, looking at the wall opposite me. I could feel her stare on the side of my face but I didn't want to look at her.

"I don't want to hear your apologies Jace. I shouldn't have gotten so angry, but you don't know what it was like thinking my brother might have killed you. I was so upset, and when I'm upset I tend to get angry."

"We both acted a little crazy, huh?" I muttered, thinking back to the moment I decided to go after Jonathon. Looking at it now, it was insane. Clary nodded silently and we didn't speak for a long time.

"What was it like?" she asked softly, breaking the awkward silence that had suffocated us.

"Going against Jonathon?" I asked. She nodded again. "Well, to begin with I wasn't scared at all. I didn't feel much of anything, really. I was kind of numb. Then he started saying things, and I got confused… angry. He knew my name."

"When you say he started saying things, what do you mean?"

"It was weird. He kept talking about angels; how Gabriel has forgotten he can fly. Most of it made no sense, but then he said about there being a third…"

"A third what?"

"Experiment. He said that you two aren't the only ones."

Clary closed her eyes slowly, letting out a long breath. She ran her hands through her thick, damp curls suddenly looking exhausted.

"I should have guessed. Jonathon always used to make hints about it but I never took him seriously. I wonder who it is…"

I shrugged against the pillows. "He didn't say, but whoever it is should seriously watch their back."

"Hodge might know something. I should go ask." She said as she stood up, but I grabbed hold of her hand quickly.

"Don't go yet. Have a break from all of this."

She looked down at her hand in mine, a deep crimson blush ebbing in to her cheeks. She pulled her hand away with a tiny nod and sank back in to the chair.

"So… tell me about you?" she asked warily after a long moment of thoughtful silence. I frowned at my blanket and shifted uncomfortably.

"What do you want to know?"

"Well… um, I was just curious about your-"

I cut her off with a wave of my hand.

"Parents?" she nodded her answer. I smiled wirily.

"They're dead."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

I laughed and looked over to her. She was examining the laces of her shoes, the blush even brighter crimson than it had been before.

"Why are you apologising? It's not like you had anything to do with their death."

"I…" she stammered, "I don't know."

"You shouldn't apologise for things you have no control over. It makes genuine apologies seem insincere."

"Right. Do you mind if I ask… what happened? You don't have to tell me, of course."

I looked right at her, contemplating her question. She looked anywhere else but me, clearly embarrassed about asking. I swallowed.

"My mother died giving birth to me and my father killed himself a few days later." My voice was even but she looked up at me, tears suddenly brimming in her green eyes.

"Oh," was all she said, quickly turning her face away.

"I lived with my grandmother for a while after that apparently, but she died not long after my first birthday. She was old; not as fast as she used to be. A forsaken ripped her apart."

She gasped quietly.

"That's awful."

I shrugged, "It happens. I was lucky, though. Michael had recently lost his wife and son in a fire, and he was close to my parents. He adopted me."

I watched Clary wipe an escaped tear, swallowing the urge to wipe it away my self.

"Michael?" she asked very quietly.

"Michael Wayland. I took his name. He was a great warrior; he taught me almost everything I know."

"So what was your original surname?"

"Herondale. I was Jonathon Herondale." Saying the name filled me with grief and anger for the family I had never known. I balled my fists.

"Jonathon?" I could hear the venom in her voice, but I knew it wasn't for me. I nodded.

"Jace is just a nickname."

"How did you end up with the Lightwood's?"

I smiled ruefully. This was not a story I enjoyed telling.

"When I was ten I watched a man murder my father- well, Michael, I guess. There was nowhere for me to go. I went from Shadowhunter home to Shadowhunter home, but no one wanted me. I was too damaged- broken goods. I would start fights with the other kids because I was so angry and upset.

"I threw myself in to my training even more viciously than I had done with my father. By the time I was twelve I'd killed more demons than any other kid my age, and a good deal more than most of the older kids too. It was only by chance that the Clave decided to put me with the Lightwood's. The Clave had become sick of me starting fights and getting in to trouble, and thought I should get out of Idris. They put me in New York. Maryse didn't like the idea because she had three kids of her own to look after, but they didn't have a choice.

"I didn't want to leave. Idris had been my home since I was born. I didn't want to leave it behind because it felt like I was forgetting about my family; about my past. The day I left Idris was the hardest of my life. I left part of myself back there."

She didn't say anything, but tears dripped down her cheeks and from her chin; a silent waterfall of some unknown pain she was feeling. I wanted to offer her some comfort, but I was fighting my own demons. I rarely spoke about my past. I rarely let anyone in. Talking about it made it feel like there was a raw hole where my heart used to be and someone was rubbing handfuls of salt in to the wound.

Clary sniffed and said quietly, "I need to find my mother."

"I know." I said simply, holding out my hand for her to take. She squeezed it gently and didn't pull it away. I fought back the smile that pulled at my lips.

"I don't even know where to start. Hodge won't let me out of this place and how the hell am I supposed to find one woman in New York?"

"I was thinking about it yesterday before… well, Y'know, _this_ happened. I think I might have an idea. See, Alec knows this guy… a warlock. He could help us."

Clary's eyes widened and a brief flicker of a smile flashed across her face.

"You think he would?"

"Sure. But I think we'd have to take Alec with us."

"I don't care, as long as he'll hep!" she said happily and leapt up from the chair. She threw her thin arms around my neck, hugging me so tightly that I could only just breathe- but it was a good kind of painful. I sat up a little so I could return the hug. She smelled of strawberries.

"I don't know what I'd do without you, Wayland" she whispered in to my ear before she began to pull away.

I don't know what took over me, but the missing pressure of her small frame was nearly painful. I grabbed hold of her hand before she could escape the embrace completely, searching her wide eyes for something I couldn't place. She stared back at me, her eyebrows pulled together in to a confused frown. It was in that moment that I found a word that matched the feelings I felt for Clary; one single world that explained the tightness in my stomach, my impulsive actions, my over protectiveness, my caring about someone other than my self. It didn't make sense for it to be this word- I'd known her for no more than three days- but then again, things rarely did make sense. I should have known from the first time I looked in to her green eyes that I didn't even stand a fucking chance.

Love.

I loved her.

Without thinking, I leaned my face towards hers. I kept my eyes on hers all the time so I could see her reaction. Her frown melted away and I could see the shock in her eyes, but I could have sworn a smile flashed briefly over her face. I was close enough to count every single freckle on her face, to hear the almost silent hitch of her breath. Her mouth inched excruciatingly slowly towards me, and just as her lips grazed against mine I heard a slight cough in the doorway.

Clary pulled away from me quick as a flash and I snapped my annoyed eyes toward the intruder. I glared at Alec with all the anger I could muster. He simply smiled, looking like he was extremely proud of himself.

"Mom said to tell the pair of you that dinner's ready." He said lightly before turning on his heel and leaving the room with a quiet laugh.

"Fucking whoopee." I growled as I turned back to Clary. She had edged away from my bed and was back to looking at her shoe laces.

"Clary, I-"

"I'll see you in the kitchen." She said quickly, before making a break for the door.

I sighed heavily and slammed my fists on to the mattress.

"Wonderful."

* * *

_To love is to destroy. To love is to destroy. To love is to destroy…_

I repeated the mantra over and over in my head as I made my way to the training room. If my father could hear me now, he'd be proud. It was, after all, his motto. He lived by those five words, saying them every single day since my mother left us.

_To love is to destroy. To love is to destroy…_

It had been a week since the almost-kiss with Jace; a week of painfully awkward glances, stinted conversations and walking in the opposite direction if he came within ten metres of me. He'd tried to talk to me about it only once, right after dinner that day. He caught up to me as I hurried back to my room, swinging idly on his crutches and clicking his tongue with impatience when he had to negotiate a door. I'd pretended I didn't hear him following me, choosing to run and cower in my bedroom for the rest of the evening instead of manning up and facing what had happened. The next day he'd sat in the room while Izzy, Alec and I had done some training. He'd shouted explicitly at Alec when he looked like he was having too much fun pinning me to the wall by my throat. I'd frowned and kicked Alec almost lazily to the floor then walked out without looking back. He hadn't really spoken to me since then, but he'd try to catch my eye sometimes.

_To love is to destroy. To love is to destroy…_

I don't really know why I was avoiding him. I'd realised as my lips brushed against his that I felt something for him. Well, really, it was more than something. I was pretty sure it was _it_. That word that I wouldn't put in context for my own sanity. It was too soon. My feelings couldn't possibly be that way inclined towards him yet. In any case, I didn't have time to be involved with anyone. I had to find my mother and stop Jonathon and my father before it was too late.

_To love is to destroy. To love is to- holy mother of God, this is _so_ not fair!_

I was certain someone was trying to kill me as I walked through the doors to the training room. Jace was stood in the centre of the mats, sans crutches, pounding the hell out of a punch bag. There was an angry scowl across his face and tiny droplets of sweat running down his naked torso. I swear I tried not to stare, but damn me if it wasn't hard.

The door closed with an obvious slam behind me and he whipped his head around to see who'd come in. Seeing me, he dropped his unpadded fists and wiped his forehead with his arm, raising an eyebrow.

"What do you want?"

_You._

"I came to do some training. It is a _training room_ after all." I rolled my eyes at my self more than at him; thanking the angel for the fact my mind had a filter.

"You were staring."

"No," I said quickly, scrambling for an excuse, "I was observing. When you hit the bag with your right arm, your hand isn't always straight. You want to watch that; you could hurt your self."

He snorted in disbelief. "Right. Thanks." He said before going back to his training. As I set up my own targets I noticed him paying extra attention to his right arm and smiled.

We trained in silence for a while, but it was hard to concentrate with him in the room. Blades missed their heart shaped targets as I struggled to keep my attention focused on which direction I was suppose to be throwing them in. Most of them embedded in to the wood-panelled walls with resounding_ thunk's_, but one managed to find its way deep in to Jace's punch bag. He jumped back with a cry of alarm, eyeing the glowing handle of the knife warily. Slowly, painfully, his gaze moved to me; incredulous and annoyed.

"Are you trying to kill me?" he asked calmly. I marched to his punch bag and pulled the knife out smoothly, shooting him a frown.

"Of course I wasn't. It was an accident." I said, turning my back on him and throwing the knife with my usual deadly accuracy. It hit the target heart dead centre with a heavy thud and I smiled grimly. I moved to collect it but Jace was in front of me in a flash. Sometimes it was unsettling how quickly he moved.

He looked at me with stern eyes, holding out the glowing blade to me. I took it, shoved it in to the sheath at my hip and raised my eyebrows at him, feigning nonchalance even though my heart rate had doubled because of his close proximity.

"Why have you been avoiding me?" he asked, pronouncing every separate syllable.

"I wasn't aware that I had been." I lied, casting my eyes down at his sneakers. I heard his soft irritated laugh before he spoke again, his voice sharp as the knives I'd been throwing.

"Want to know how I'm certain you're lying?"

I didn't answer but he continued anyway.

"You always look at the floor when you lie. It's how I can call your bluff. So tell me; _why have you been avoiding me?_"

"Jace…"

He shook his head with a bitter laugh.

"You can just tell me if you didn't want to kiss me, you know. I'm not going to bite your head off just because you're the only girl in the world who doesn't find me massively attractive. I mean, I knew it had to happen some day but I didn't expect it to be _before_ I was dead."

"Jace it's not that I don't-"

"You know what, Clary? It doesn't matter. I was under the impression that you might have been a bit more mature about the whole thing but I guess I was wrong. I guess you're just an immature little girl, just like the rest of them."

"Don't call me little girl! I'm almost seventeen and, judging by how you're acting, I'm far more mature than you." I fumed back at him, squaring my shoulders and rearing to my full height even though I only just made it to his collar bone. His lips curled up at the edges, like he was glad I was fighting back. Looking in to his eyes, I could see a weeks worth of frustration barred behind them as plain as day. Their usual tawny colour was washed over, making them look almost black. I couldn't help but be drawn to his lips; they might have been drawn in to a taunting line, but they still looked excruciatingly soft.

"Prove it," he growled. I swore loudly, angrily, and did the first thing I could think of.

Before he could stop me, I threw my arms around his neck and crashed my lips furiously to his. He stood for a moment, completely frozen, before he thawed out of his confused state and his lips softened. They moved excruciatingly slowly against mine to begin with; nothing more than a mere whisper of a kiss. It was almost unbearable. I wound my fingers in to his hair and pulled on it gently, loving the feel of his silky locks on my skin. He growled against my mouth and pulled me to his body, tilting my chin with his index finger so the kiss deepened. My heart was hammering against my chest as his tongue traced my lips, pleading for entry.

I granted it.

After that I wasn't sure if I was kissing him, or if he was kissing me, but it didn't matter in the slightest. The feel of his mouth against mine was electric, and I never wanted to forget it. My hands roamed over his bare back, tracing the line of his muscles lightly with my fingertips. He pulled me ever closer to his body, his hands taking greedy handfuls of the t-shirt I was wearing. It was clear that we were both still furious; the kiss was like some kind of tug of war- a battle for supremacy- but if that was the case, I wanted him to win. He pushed me hard against the back wall but I it wasn't pain I felt, it was pure pleasure. I took his lower lip between my teeth as his hands massaged the skin just above the waist of my sweats.

I was the one who finally broke the kiss. I gasped for air since I'd forgotten to breathe, already missing the static tingle against my skin. Jace brought his hands up to my face and cupped it lightly, planting soft kisses on every patch of skin he could find. I shuddered as he kissed the sensitive patch of skin just by my ear and he grinned against my neck.

"If that's how you react when I make you angry, I think I'll do it more often."

"Shut up, jerk." I shot back, but my tone was playful. He brought his eyes to mine and smiled before kissing my lips gently and stepping back. My body automatically moved to get closer to him again, but he held up a long, slender finger; effectively stopping me in my tracks.

"Now we have that out of the way are you going to tell me why you avoided me for an entire week? Any outside observer would have thought I had the plague from the way you acted when I came near you."

I sighed and propped myself back against the wall. He folded his arms across his chest, his face expectant.

"Don't you think it's a little too soon?" I finally asked.

"Entirely," he shrugged, "but if it feels right then who are we to stop it?"

My mouth opened and closed again. I had nothing to argue. He smiled wolfishly, sensing an easy victory, and brought his face close to mine, his tawny eyes still the colour of pitch. He rested his hands on the wall either side of my head, trapping me.

"I still need to find my mom," I breathed, just before his lips touched mine.

"About that. I spoke to Hodge this morning and he say's it's cool for you to leave. We could go see Magnus today, if you'd like?"

"That would be great."

"You want to leave now…?" his voice sounded rough in my ear. I smiled.

"Give it a half hour, maybe."

* * *

I felt lighter than I had in years. The last time I remembered feeling this happy was…what? Seven years ago? The last time I'd had a real smile on my face was the morning my father had been murdered. It was like I was giving my self a facial work out, using muscles I'd forgotten were there. It felt strange, but right.

We were outside of Magnus Banes apartment now. Alec and Isabelle were arguing quietly like they had been the entire journey here. Alec was insisting that it was a bad idea to come here and Isabelle was telling him to quit acting like a baby- he was eighteen for god's sake. I had no idea why they were arguing, and to be brutally honest, I didn't give a damn. I was too focused on Clary to care.

She was dressed in Shadowhunter gear, a look of fierce determination on her face as she glared at the warlock's door. Her red hair was pulled back in to a clip at the base of her neck though stray curls blew carelessly across her face. She was paler than usual; her hands were in tight fists at her side, knuckles white, and her stance was rigid and formal.

"You okay?" I asked quietly, laying my hand on her shoulder. She seemed to come out of some kind of daydream and turned to face me, a small smile on her lips and a flush in her cheeks.

"I'm fine. I just want to get this over with. Can we go inside?"

"Alec doesn't think it's a good idea." Isabelle drawled, shooting her brother an annoyed look.

"Alec never thinks anything is a good idea." I said. Isabelle nodded her agreement.

"We can't just turn up at his house uninvited," Alec argued weakly, running his hand nervously through his hair.

"We might be uninvited, but I'm pretty sure he knows we're here," Clary said, pointing to one of the windows on the top floor. A tall slender man with spiky black hair was stood by it, looking down at us with a tiny cat in his arms. He turned away from the window when he spotted us looking. I pushed past Alec and rang the doorbell, ignoring his protests.

We didn't have to wait long for Magnus to show his face. As the door opened, Clary reached out for my hand and I gave it a quick squeeze. Magnus regarded us coolly until his eyes met Alec's. He flashed him a bright smile and patted down his canary yellow shirt.

"Alec Lightwood. I wasn't expecting to see you today."

Alec flushed bright crimson and mumbled something unintelligible. I rolled my eyes.

"We need to talk to you."

Magnus ignored me, his cats eyes still focused on Alec.

"Strange company you're keeping today. The sister and the village idiot, I can understand, but a Morgenstern? I have to say it's a little odd."

"How did you know-" Clary began, frowning, but Magnus waved her off.

"Please. The downworlders are buzzing over your escape from daddy. They think you might stop murdering us now you've realised what a bastard he is. And besides, your mother warned me that you might turn up. You look just like her."

"You know my mother?" she asked, eyes wide.

As Magnus laughed a spray of glitter fell from his hair, showering the pavement.

"Of course I do."

"Do you know where-"

Magnus sighed, "I suppose you'd better come in. The walls have ears." He muttered and lazily flicked a fairy from his doorframe. It swore in its high pitched voice, shaking a tiny fist towards the warlock. He looked at it pointedly before turning his back on us, leading the way in to his apartment.

* * *

**So what did you think? Reviews are better than Jace topless. Maybe. **


	6. O Mother Where Art Thou

**A/N I don't own anything except this crazy plot.**

**Okay so this chapter didn't go as well as I wanted too, but I don't think it's so bad. This week has been all kinds of crazy with moving home AND it's my birthday today, so things have been pretty busy. I just wanted to get it out there because I've been sat staring at it for so long!**

**Please let me know what you think! I accept anonymous reviews too! **

* * *

Walking in to Magnus' apartment was like witnessing an explosion at a paint factory. The walls of the main room were hung with at least fifty different tapestries; some brightly dyed silk with glittery patterns woven through them, others just plain and simple block colours of thick threads. The floor was painted mat black and it glittered in the dim, sleepy light of the red voile-covered lamps set artistically around the room. The thick purple velvet curtains that trailed down to the floor were drawn so the room was almost unbearably stuffy. I instantly regretted wearing my all black Shadowhunting gear.

"Take a seat," Magnus drawled, gesturing his hand lazily towards the various sofa's and beanbags around the room. I followed Jace to a bright gold loveseat and sat down. Alec plopped himself beside his sister on a huge chaise lounge, looking extremely uncomfortable. His eyes flickered from Jace, to my self- where they narrowed slightly- then to Magnus and back to Jace again in quick succession. Magnus looked dryly amused. Isabelle toyed with the handle of her whip and leaned in to Alec's ear, whispering something to him. His mouth opened a little and his eyebrows furrowed, but he cast his gaze to the ground without replying.

"So," Magnus said lightly as he folded himself gracefully in to a large rainbow coloured beanbag, "I know it's probably pointless asking, but what can I do for you charming Nephilim?"

"I need to find my mother. You said you know her…?" I hedged. Magnus smiled like a cat, showing his white, slightly pointed teeth.

"Yes, I know Jocelyn. She comes here often to check on you."

"Check on Clary?" Jace asked, confused. He took my hand in his absently and ran his thumb in circles over my skin.

"Ever since Clarissa's mother left Idris, she's been coming to see me once a week so she can check up on her scheming little princess over there." He said knowingly. I rolled my eyes.

"So does she know I'm here? Has she been trying to find me?"

Magnus shook his head 'no'.

"That's not how it works, honey. As soon as you left Idris, I couldn't see you. It was like you'd vanished in to thin air."

I sat for a moment, my eyebrows furrowed in confusion, before I remembered. I pulled up the sleeve of my jacket and pointed a finger to the activated rune at the crook of my elbow. It was the same shape as the first rune I'd ever received- the sight rune- except the inner of the eye was completely shaded in black with a ring of crimson around the edges.

"It's an anti-tracking rune I created to buy myself some time. It was meant to stop my father from finding me but I guess it worked on other people too."

"It can't have worked that well if Jonathon managed to track you down," Jace pointed out stiffly. I shook my head.

"Jonathon is different. He doesn't need tracking runes to find me but it must have confused him for a while other wise he would have found me sooner. I knew it would only temporarily blind _him_ but it did stop you from realising I was a Shadowhunter, though, if you remember?"

Jace scrunched his eyebrows together, nodding silently.

"I couldn't see your runes until you showed them willingly."

From the other side of the room, Magnus let out a long yawn.

"I'm sorry to break up the cramming session, but I am the High Warlock of Brooklyn. I have better things to be doing with my time than listen to the dulcet tones of pubescent Nephilim all day."

To my right, I heard Alec make a noise that sounded somewhere between choking and laughter. I turned to look at him and saw with astonishment that he was actually smiling.

"Like what?" he asked Magnus with a playful smile on his lips, "All you do is sit about watching _America's Next Top Model_ re-runs all day and talk to your cat."

"How would you know?" Isabelle injected slyly, smiling as Alec blushed deep crimson. Magnus, choosing to ignore Isabelle's comment, rolled his eyes dramatically and scooped a ball of fluff from the ground that I supposed was the cat in question. It mewled as Magnus stroked it fondly, pawing at the front of his shirt.

"Chairman Meow has far better conversation than you Shadowhunters. Look, Clarissa-"

"Clary," Jace and I corrected at the same time. He glanced at me with a smirk and I grinned back, looking at him from beneath my eyelashes. I saw his eyes linger on my lips…

"How cute." Magnus said insincerely, eyeing us with equal parts distain and amusement and effectively breaking us from our little bubble, "Well, _Clary_, do you want your mothers address or not? I'm bored of your company, and making small talk with a Morgenstern is not something high on my 'to-do' list." He tossed his hands impatiently so a cloud of glitter shed from him. The cat on his lap let out a noise of disgust, leapt from Magnus' knees and stalked out of the room.

"Of course she wants the address. We wouldn't have come all the way here if we just wanted a chat."

"Quiet Blondie. I wasn't talking to you."

Jace was about to answer back but I got in before him, putting a thankful smile on my face for Magnus' benefit.

"Yes, please. That would be great."

Ten minutes later, Jace, Isabelle and I left the apartment, sans Alec. He'd babbled some excuse about wanting to ask Magnus for advice on something or other, but he spoke so low that no one actually heard any of the details. Isabelle walked a few paces in front of Jace and I as we walked towards the main street, hand in hand, muttering something about 'idiot brothers who don't know an opportunity even if it smacks them in the face with a hammer'.

As Jace and I flagged down a cab to take us to my mom's place, Isabelle sighed and made her excuses as well.

"I have a date tonight and I need optimum time to get ready." She explained as she whipped out her cell phone and sent a text. Barley ten seconds later her phone buzzed the persons reply. She glanced down the street towards Magnus' apartment, shaking her head and rolling her eyes.

"Who seriously needs four hours to get changed?" Jace scoffed as I slid in to the cab. The back seats were covered with worn and battered black leather and smelled faintly of some kind of car polish and tobacco. I inhaled the smell as I ran my fingers lightly over a frayed tear in the leather, thinking about my mother. The thought of seeing her after so long made me feel sick to my stomach with nerves.

Jace climbed in beside me and automatically grabbed for my hand, as if he didn't even realise he was doing it. Isabelle leaned against the back of the car and spoke through the open window.

"I do. I usually have more time to work with but… whatever. Good luck with your mom Clary!" she grinned and smacked the metal frame. The cab driver asked for the address and Jace reeled it off from the little square of paper he held in his hand. I watched Isabelle saunter away; her head bent low over her phone.

"You okay?" Jace asked a few minutes later. I'd been completely silent as I continued running my fingers along the tear in the seat. The feel of the fibres running along my skin was relaxing so I offered him a quick smile.

"Fine," I said, though I could taste the bitter lie on my tongue. I was not fine. I was terrified. Terrified of what my mother might say to me, what I might say to her; terrified of my emotions. Part of me hated her- really, honestly hated her- for leaving me, but the other part yearned to be back with my mother. That part of me had me feeling like a child again, longing to be in the familiar and comforting arms of my mother.

I wondered if she would even recognise me. I was thinner and taller than I had been then. My hair was longer and my skin was paler and in some lights, it almost looked translucent. My body was padded with unobvious muscle, and undoubtedly more grown up than it would have been the last time I'd laid eyes on her. There hadn't just been physical change, either. I was also stronger and less penetrable than I had ever been before. I was no longer the naïve girl she'd left behind. I was a warrior- a real Shadowhunter.

And then I remembered. She had seen me. She'd watched me every week from Magnus' apartment through the tracking rune. She'd seen me, but hadn't come to me herself. She must have seen how unhappy I was without her. She couldn't have gone two whole years of watching without seeing the edges of the façade crack and splinter every once in a while. The painfully familiar boiling hatred for my mother swelled up in my chest once more, burning my throat and making my breath catch. It was in this state of mind that Jace handed the cab driver his money and gently nudged me with worried eyes.

"Clary, we're here." He said, his gaze flicking to the now shredded leather beneath my fingertips. I could see the question in his eyes as he scanned my face. 'Are you sure you want to do this now?' they seemed to say. I nodded and slid out of the cab.

I found myself facing a neat looking one family house with a painted red front that matched every other building in the row. Beneath the windows, whose curtains were already drawn, were flowers that I was certain only typically grew in Idris. There was something simmering in the air around the house- something that felt like a ward of some kind. It made me certain I was in the right place.

"Think this is it?" Jace asked as he came to my side. I nodded my head, pointing to the flowers.

"Can't you sense it? There's magic in this place. I can almost taste the sorcery on my tongue."

Jace concentrated for a moment before screwing up his face.

"It seems familiar… I'm going to check the demon levels, just in case." I nodded in agreement and he pulled out his sensor.

"Very low demon activity. If there have been any nasties around here, it hasn't been recently. Should we try the door?"

"I guess." I sighed and made my way up the gravel driveway, Jace not far behind with his sensor still in his hand. I was about to bang my fist against the door when I heard someone shout.

"Hey!"

I whirled on my heel, grabbing for my seraph blade as I went, and glared towards the source of the noise. It was a boy around my own age with dark hair and glasses that slipped dangerously to the tip of his nose. He ran towards us from the next house along, his face scrunched in concentration. He wasn't obviously beautiful like Jace was, but as he got closer I could tell that he was handsome in a completely understated way. Jace caught me eyeballing the boy and punched my arm lightly. I managed a quiet laugh and a smile before the boy tripped over the laces of his Chuck Taylor's and careened straight in to me.

I cursed loudly as we hit the ground, but I was thankful that my head hit the soft grass rather than the concrete path because, lets face it, that could have been potentially fatal. The boy landed on top of me with a long string of cusses and apologised profusely as Jace seized him by the scruff of the neck and yanked him off me without much grace. The boy stood, crimson faced, as I pushed my self up from the floor and brushed my self off.

"Are you alright?" Jace asked, ignoring the mundane boy at his side who had obviously grazed his arm. I nodded and flashed him a smile. To be honest, I was kind of amused. Jace turned to the mundane and growled, "You're lucky you didn't hurt her. Touch her again and I will personally rip off your-"

"Jace," I said with a warning tone in my voice. He stared hard at the mundane again before coming to my side and clutching my hand in his. I squeezed it reassuringly.

"Can we help you?" I asked the boy. He stared at me, apparently dazed, for a second before he shook his head.

"Oh, right, yeah. Well… I'm Simon. I live next door. My mom told me to tell you that Jocelyn isn't home. She's at my house doing whatever adult women do. Last time I heard they were talking about men but I got bored of listening and went to kill off some Elves on-"

"You've been killing elves?" I asked with my eyebrows furrowed.

"Yeah," he smiled proudly, "See, I'm a vampire king and-"

"You're a vampire? What about the Clave rules! It's forbidden to kill other downworlders!" my voice was horrified and my hand tightened on my seraph blade. Now I was closer to the building, I could smell something distinctly downworlder…

"He's lying, Clary. He's not one of us. And you know that vampires can't come out in the sunlight." Jace said evenly, though I could see him tensed to attack.

"Dude, I have no idea what you're talking about, but don't let my sister hear you say that about vampires. There's this one vamp she's in love with- I forget his name- but he sparkles in sunlight. If it wasn't so _gay_ it would be totally cool."

"You finished spouting bull yet?" Jace huffed, "We need to speak to Jocelyn."

"Sure. I'll go tell her you're here. What are your names?" Simon asked.

"This is Jace," I gestured towards him with a smile and then pointed to my self, "And I'm-"

"_Clarissa_? Is that you?"

The woman that stood behind Simon looked like the mirror imagine of myself, only she was older. Her wild red hair was scraped back in to a messy bun at the back of her head; a long paint brush was shoved haphazardly through it. She wore paint smeared blue overalls tucked hastily in to the top of a pair of caked industrial boots, making her look almost as colourful as Magnus' apartment had been. There was a single streak of violet paint smudged along her cheek; she wiped it hastily as she eyed me with badly disguised disbelief.

"_Mom_." I tried to say but the word was drowned out by the rushing in my ears. We were stood a safe distance apart, far enough away so I couldn't touch her and she couldn't touch me, though I could see her hand twitching at her side. I saw Jace looking at me out of the corner of my eyes and looked down at my own hands. They were balled in to tight fists and I knew my face would be bright red.

"What are you doing here?" my mom said. There was a catch in her voice that told me she was upset, but all it did was feed the anger that had sparked within me in the cab. My fists tightened even more, turning my knuckles white.

"Nice to see you too, mom. It's been what? Two years?" I snarled. The mundane looked between us, obviously confused. I shot him a glaring look that plainly told him to back the fuck off.

"Clarissa…" my mom hedged but I shook my head.

"I'd really like to know why you left me, mom."

"Don't you think we should go inside?" she asked, uncomfortable. I laughed bitterly.

"No, I think we're just fine out here. You don't mind if we have our little family reunion in front of you guys, do you Jace? Simon?"

"I… I think I should go inside. It was nice to meet you both." Simon muttered and ducked away, tripping over his feet in his haste to get back in side.

"He seemed nice," I smiled. My mom frowned and I felt a warm hand on my shoulder.

"We should go inside too, Clary." Jace said in my ear. My mom gasped, her eyes widening as she took in Jace as if she hadn't even noticed him before now.

"Stephen…" she whispered. I glowered at her, confused, but Jace just seemed shocked.

"That was my father's name. Stephen Herondale."

"Yes. We were friends when we were younger. My husband… _Valentine_ was best man at your parents wedding and Stephen asked him to be your God Father. Of course, that never happened…"

"I don't mean to be rude, Jocelyn, but i don't think now is the time to talk about my parents." Jace said darkly. My mother was gabbling an apology when his cell phone began to ring loudly from his jacket pocket. I watched as he flipped open the tiny black phone and put it to his ear, frown still in place.

"Izzy." He greeted his sister placidly. I shot my mother a withering look and she winced, twirling a stray strand of red hair nervously around her finger. She avoided my eyes every time I tried to catch her attention, like she was a young child shying away from a confrontation.

"WHAT?" Jace erupted, his eyes wide and fearful. After a few moments, he nodded his head sharply and shot me and my mother a glance.

"What's wrong?" I asked. A sudden wave of nausea rolled over me. Something was wrong, I just knew it.

"We'll be right there." He hissed in to the mouth piece and snapped the phone shut, shoving it back in to his pocket.

"Jace. Tell me what has happened." I demanded.

He ignored my question and turned to my mother with a steely unsettling resolve. I could see a muscle working in his jaw.

"Can you fight?"

* * *

**So am I losing any of you? Think I need to up the pace a little? Or a lot, maybe? There will be fighting in the next chapter and I promise it won't take so long to update!**

**Leave me some birthday reviews- they make me want to update quicker! :D**


	7. Time's Up

**A/N: TMI belongs to Cassandra Clare, not me! **

**The end of this chapter was so hard to write. I hope I did it justice.**

* * *

"Please hurry, mom." My voice cracked at the end of the sentence. She mumbled a reply but the buzzing in my ears was too loud to hear over. I snapped the phone closed with a quiet 'bye' and tossed it on to my bed before I scrambled towards the pile of Shadowhunting gear I'd barely just shrugged off. With a fleeting, rueful glance at my reflection, I pulled off the silver strapless dress I'd donned for my date and threw on the tough black leather pants and jacket, mumbling angrily as I pulled my long black hair up in to a bun, having just spent an hour curling it to perfection. As I yanked on my knee high demon-stomping boots I could feel my heart beating frantically in my rib cage as though it was making a bid to stop beating altogether. With another look at my reflection, I could see that my eyes were wide; my cheeks flushed with worry.

"Izzy," a quiet voice said from the doorway. I turned as I buckled my weapons belt around my waist to see Max hesitating just outside my room. He was wearing his checked shirt buttoned to his chin and tucked in to the waist of his neatly pressed tan pants; his usually mussed black hair was brushed carefully to the side- the way mother had styled it before she'd left the house earlier. He gripped his stele in one hand and a glowing seraph blade in the other; his face pulled in to the same determined expression I often saw on Jace.

"I thought I told you to stay in your room," I turned my back on him, looking for my whip. My hands were shaking and my mind was reeling, even though I knew I'd done everything I could for the moment. I'd called everyone I could think of- Jace, Alec, my parents… they were all coming as soon as possible but the wait was killing me. I'd looked for Hodge but there was no sign of him at the Institute. I'd tried calling him too but there was no answer to his cell…

"I want to fight, Isabelle." Max said with a frown.

"No." I said, my voice offering no invite to argument as I wound the electrum whip around my arm and waved him over to the window. He stood beside me and I flicked my hand towards the sight outside. I watched as he tried desperately to fight back the horror that threatened to take over his face but I could see in his eyes as he examined the sight that it was a wasted effort.

Demons. Hundreds of demons swarmed around the walls to the institute, pressing their vile bodies against the building and in the centre of them all was a face. He grinned up at us as we looked down on him, daring me with a poisonous smile to come down and fight. I glared back and turned to my brother.

"Do you _see_ that, Max? There is no way in hell I'm letting you go out there." I said fiercely.

"But Jace-"

"_Jace_ is old enough. _Jace_ can handle himself against demons. _You're_ only a kid, Max! If you went out there you wouldn't stand a chance."

"But he said I'm good-"

I sighed, "And you are, Max, but you're my little brother. It would be suicide if you went outside."

"Mom and dad-"

"-would have chained you to your bed by now. You're lucky it's me who is home and not them. Everyone's on their way now and it will be over before you know it. Please Max, have _some _sense of self preservation."

He looked at me as though I'd slapped him around the face, his huge brown eyes welling with angry tears. I could tell he thought I was patronising him but I really wasn't. Truth was I knew that if I stepped outside, there was very little chance I'd be coming back in. I wouldn't even dream of hanging that sword over my own little brother's head. It was enough having it over the rest of my family's. I pulled him in to my chest, encircling him with my arms and hugged him as hard as I could. He hugged me back then stepped away, holding out his stele and seraph blade as he looked awkwardly at the ground.

"You'll need these."

I smiled at him and took them from him.

"It's called _Tabbris._ It's the first one mom and dad gave me._" _He explained. I nodded and shoved it in to one of the empty sheaths at my waist and went back to the window. The man in the centre of the swarm had disappeared but I could see his golden framed face in the back of my mind as if it was burned there with a fire brand.

"Does this have something to do with Clary?" Max asked, coming to sit at the foot of my bed. I nodded my head solemnly. The golden boy with the demons shared that strange sibling resemblance to Clary even though they looked almost completely different. It was something in the teasing of his eyes and curl of his smile that had clued me in that he was her brother- even though I was pretty certain of it anyway.

"Everything." My voice was nothing more that a whisper. Max sighed.

"I like her. She taught me some cool tricks. She's not dangerous, you know Izzy. Not to the right side, anyway."

"Yeah. But how do we know for sure which is the right side in her head?"

Max smiled weakly and pointed to his heart.

"You know it here."

* * *

Magnus was still pottering around his room as I tapped my foot impatiently at his doorway.

"For the angel's sake, Magnus! Talk about taking your sweet time. Jace needs us!" I yelled out to him. He emerged from his bedroom, a frown set on his face.

"_Jace_ can look after himself and, if I recall rightly, it was your sister who called, not Princess Peach." He pushed me lightly by the shoulder and I stumbled down the stairs and out in to the street.

"That's what I meant. I meant that Isabelle needed us."

Magnus rolled his eyes and tapped the door handle lightly. I heard the faint click of a lock.

"We both know you're lying. I thought you said you were over Jace?" there was the tiniest hint of accusation in Magnus' voice and I glared at him, ignoring the blush creeping in to my cheeks.

"I am. You know I am."

"You're so cute when you blush." He teased after a moment of watching me closely. He leaned down to give me a swift kiss on the lips then took my hand in his so he could lead me down the street.

The sun was starting to fade in to twilight; the sky was leaking bright crimson through the stray patches of blue that had remained behind, like spilt blood ebbing through pale material. The temperature had dropped drastically so that my breath clouded white in front of my face. I didn't like it.

"Something wicked this way comes," Magnus grinned after he had taken a deep inhalation of the air. I frowned and inhaled myself. There was a foul stench in the air. It smelled like-

"Demons, and a lot of them too. Come on. We need to hurry."

I nodded and looked down at the single seraph blade at my hip. There was a synagogue a few blocks from here, and after what Izzy had said on the phone, I was certain I'd need what it offered.

"There's somewhere I need to stop first. I'm not well enough equipped."

Magnus snickered and I cast my eyes wearily towards him.

"_I_ think you're _equipped _enough already."

* * *

"The Clave have set up an immediate order for a portal to be created. They're sending through as many Shadowhunters as possible."

I nodded solemnly at my husband.

"How long?"

"An hour? Two? Who knows?" he rubbed his forehead wearily. I took his other hand in my own and squeezed it, thinking about my family back at the Institute.

"What if that's too late?"

* * *

As I looked around my surroundings, I came to the conclusion that today was turning out to be a pretty bad day.

"Holy shit…"

I remembered back to the image of the Institute that had been imprinted in to my mind for years- since the first day I'd moved in here. I remembered the grounds around it, bleak and solemn in any kind of weather; I remembered the thick, impenetrable grey stone walls of the building it's self. It had once offered me some kind of hope for safety, but now? Not so much. Now it was surrounded by a cacophony of demons: bone-white Raum demons, acid green Oni demons with their deadly, pointed horns, the awkward bird demons with blades for talons and spider demons with dozens of legs and eight razor sharp pincers protruding from their bodies- there were too many to keep track of, and there were too many that I didn't recognise.

So yeah, like I said. _Pretty bad_ day.

I reached for _Ramiel_ and _Rashnu_ at my hips and felt the calming feeling of the angel blades through my skin. I named them swiftly, hearing Clary and Jocelyn do the same on either side of me. Clary hadn't spoken a word since I'd told her what was happening, but if I said she looked furious, then it was nothing compared to the look on Jocelyn's face. Her teeth were bared and her eyes flashed malevolently as she swung one of her blades expertly through the air as if she was getting the feel for it after a long break from training.

"And you say my _son_ is in there?" she spat she caught the weapon by the hilt. Clary seemed to jerk out of some day dream and looked sharply to her mother.

"That's what Isabelle said." I answered.

"What about Valentine?"

"Father? You mean he's here somewhere?" Clary asked, her eyes impossibly wide. She looked frantic. I took her hand tightly in mine and squeezed it. She grimaced, casting her eyes around the area as if she'd be able to find him.

"I don't know." Jocelyn said quietly. Her eyes focused on my hand in her daughter's for a long moment before she raised her gaze to mine. Her eyebrows pulled together and she shook her head minutely.

"This is our chance to end this." I muttered, turning back to the demons surrounding my home. Clary laughed bitterly under her breath.

"Somehow, I doubt it will be that easy."

We waited in silence for ten minutes before we were silently joined by Alec and Magnus. They took in the sight before us, looking as sickened as I felt. I raised my eyebrows at my brother's hand in the warlock's but he just shook his head. I snickered quietly and gave him a discreet thumb's up. He looked completely mortified and whipped out his cell phone, giving him an excuse to dislodge his hand from Magnus'.

"Izzy? Yeah we're here." He murmured in to the receiver. I watched him nod solemnly to himself.

"They're bringing backup? Great. Well… it's now or never."

I felt my freshly applied marks tingle in anticipation as Alec snapped his phone shut and shoved it back in to his pants pocket. The pit of my stomach was filled with the kind of nerves that I loved. They were the kind of nerves that meant I was about to kick some serious demon butt.

"Right. Let's go." I grinned at my companions and took a step towards the walls. Someone grabbed hold of the back of my jacket and pulled me back towards them with a sharp jerk.

"No!" Clary hissed as I spun on my heel to face her. The curse that was half formed in my mouth caught as I registered the look on her face. Never had I seen anyone look so completely and utterly destroyed before.

"I can't let you do this. It's a suicide mission." She whispered. I shook my head with a roll of my eyes.

"The odds might not be in our favour-" I ignored her distained snort and carried on, "-but there is no way in hell I'm letting you face this alone. And I for one don't want to see Isabelle and Max stuck inside that place forever." I could see she was about to reply, but Jocelyn had stood from her crouch and was dashing in the opposite direction to the Institute, as though she was making a run for it. I considered running after her for a second before I saw she had crashed in to the huge body of a man surrounded by at least three dozen enormous wolves.

"The Children of the Moon. How nice. I was wondering when _he'd_ join her." Magnus said to Alec in a sing-song voice. Clary turned to her mother, open mouthed.

"Since when did she know werewolves?" she asked no one in particular.

"There are a lot of things you don't know about your mother, honey." He smiled and walked towards the man, his hand held out.

"Lucian. A pleasure, as usual."

"Hello Magnus. You know I prefer to be called Luke." The man said politely with a weary smile. He wrapped a protective arm around Jocelyn, who was looking at Clary with worried eyes. Clary was paying them no attention; her eyes were fixed on me.

"We should wait for the others. Alec said someone is bringing backup…" she said.

"Clary-" Jocelyn started but she was interrupted by a huge crash and an all too familiar high pitched scream.

"Isabelle!" Alec yelled, pulling himself from Magnus' side.

"I'm thinking it's time to go!" I said, unable to hide the glee in my voice. I pressed a swift kiss to Clary's mouth and mumbled 'see you later' in to her ear before I yanked Alec by the arm and ran straight for the first group of demons.

* * *

I watched Jace and Alec race towards the demons feeling as though I'd put their heads on the chopping block myself. My fingers traced the place where he had kissed me and, without even thinking, I followed them in to the horde of demons. I was driven by nothing but pure adrenalin and the need to see Jace survive through this awful fight.

One by one I picked my way through demon after demon, drenching myself in their sticky blood and ichor. It stung my eyes and matted in my hair but I didn't even care. I could see a speck of gold beyond the wave of demons that came towards me and I pressed on.

A spider demon hurtled towards me, flying through the air as if it had wings. A stream of neon yellow poison shot from one of it's many pincers but I easily dodged out of the way, rebounding off another demon and pushing my self up in to the air to meet it. I swung my arm around in a glowing ark and heard the satisfying _thunk, thunk_ as the two halves of its body landed on the ground. I fell down after the demon, landing with catlike accuracy in to a pool of its ichor, but the body had already disappeared. I grinned to my self and began attacking the murder of crow demons that flew at me. They were easily dispatched with the second seraph blade I'd pulled from the sheath at my hip and I continued to mow down my enemies with the twin blades until I caught sight of that blonde head again.

"Jace!" I screamed, hearing another cry in the distance. It sounded pained and the noise ripped through my heart.

_Not Jace. Please, not him_ my mind shouted over and over again as I cut my way towards the source of the noise. I followed the bobbing golden head towards the entrance way to the Institute, but my path was still blocked by too many demons.

The was a snarl behind me and I whirled in to the air, kicking out my leg and striking the Oni demon in what was meant to be it's face. It hissed angrily and pounced as I was landing, knocking me off balance, and sent me flying to the ground. I hit my head off the floor painfully and my vision was blurred for an impossibly long moment. I could see the distorted shadow of the demon prowling towards me; feel the drip of its ichor burning through the material of my pants. I scrambled for the dropped seraph blades, but I was too late. It lunged, open mouthed, for my neck and then-

It was knocked from me by a huge snarling beast. As my vision cleared, I could see that it wasn't a beast at all- it was a man who was only half way transformed in to a wolf, and he looked alarmingly like the man I'd seen my mother hugging.

"Thanks," I said as I took his extended hand. He pulled me to my feet, knocking a Raum demon out of his path with a terrible crack as he did so. I grabbed my blades and finished it off; slashing at it violently with all the strength I could muster.

"You must be Clarissa?" he smiled knowingly, swiping another demon with his clawed hands. I attacked my own demon as we pressed forwards.

"Yeah. Who exactly are you?" I shouted over the terrible screech of the demon I had just arced in to. Out of the corner of my eye I spotted Isabelle taking on three demons at once with her whip in one hand and a blade in the other. She laughed gleefully as she kicked one of them in the midriff with her huge, spike-toed boots. She caught my eye and winked. I smiled back before tossing my blade straight in to a demons head as it lunged for Izzy's shoulder.

"Thanks!" she called over, but I had already turned away.

"I'm Luke," the wolf-man replied, "I'm your mothers-"

He was cut off by another pain filled shriek. I stumbled as I saw bloodied golden hair and a familiar body stalking through the crowd of demons, cutting them down with the slightest flick of a seraph blade. I chased after him, calling his name over and over again. When I finally reached him, I grabbed for his shoulder and spun him around.

The person I saw was not Jace.

* * *

I don't know how Alec and I had managed to last this long, but we had. We were both covered from head to foot in blood and demon ichor; in general filth from the floor. My eyes stung as the dirt from my hair dripped in to them, but I ignored it for the most part- only wiping my face when I needed too the most. Every now and again I would see the form of a wolf shoot by me to take down groups of demons at a time and I was honestly grateful. My arm felt limp at my side but I continued slashing away nonetheless, all the time laughing like the crazy idiot I was.

I was trying to find Clary through the sea of demons that pressed towards us, but I would only catch a glimpse of dirty red hair every now and again. I thought I'd heard someone scream her name a few minutes- or was it hours?- ago and I'd made a mad dash in their direction but there had been nothing to find but more and more demons.

"We should head for the Institute- we can't take them all!" Alec shouted as he shot down an Oni demon with the last of his arrows. He tossed the bow aside and quickly pulled out his seraph blade and screamed its name- _Cassiel_- in to the air. He immediately arced it down on to an oncoming demon and the ichor hit his face with a painful fizz. He didn't even bat an eyelash.

"Right! Follow me!" I shouted and made a beeline to where Izzy was fighting. I could see her taking down some demons I'd never seen before and we immediately jumped in to help.

"Izzy, where's Clary?" I called. She huffed as she yanked back her whip and wiped her eyes with a wince.

"I thought she was with you? She ran after you, at least. I saw your hair by the doors." She panted as she kicked off the wall and brought down her seraph blade in to the skull on a skeleton demon. She kicked it down hard, retrieving her blade with a slight grin.

"No. I was back there with Alec. Izzy-"

A noise echoed through the courtyard- a noise that sounded like the malicious crackling of flames- and I stopped dead still, as did everything else in the battle. The three of us whipped around in time to see every single one of the demons melt in to the ground, leaving behind nothing but pools of ichor in their place. I swore in frustration and cast my eyes around the courtyard.

The wolves were half transformed in to men and Jocelyn was lying on the ground, her eyes open and her hand outstretched towards something I couldn't spot. She was crying softly to herself. I could see Magnus in the centre of the courtyard dusting his coat down with a look of disgust on his glittery face. There were at least twenty other Shadowhunters stood in the courtyard and in the middle of them were Robert and Maryse, looking confused and worn. The only person I couldn't see was-

"Clary!" Isabelle screamed, and lunged for the tiny body lying deadly still at the steps of the Institute. I could just make out a bundle of fire red hair and porcelain white skin, stained with crimson blood and black ichor, before Isabelle bundled the body in to her arms, rocking her backwards and forwards as though she was nothing but a child.

* * *

"Clary! Wake up!" I shook her body in my arms and turned to look for Jace. He looked frozen in animation, his mouth half open and his hand half extended towards the broken body of the girl I knew he was already in love with. His golden eyes had turned black. I shook her again but harder this time, whispering her name as though it would bring her back to us all.

"Relax. She's not dead." A voice drawled from above me. I looked up to see a blonde figure smiling down at me, an object whirling impossibly fast in his hand.

"What have you done to her?" I growled, setting Clary on the ground so I could stand and face him.

"Nothing a long rest won't fix." He smiled and continued, "You know, you should come back to Idris with us. I'm sure we could have a lot of fun…"

I glared at him and spat at his feet, "I'd rather die than go anywhere with you."

Something behind his eyes flashed and I took an automatic step back.

"I can have that arranged."

Behind him, the door to the Institute was creaking open. My eyes flashed to the source of the noise and I could see a small figure appearing from the crack in the doors. It was dressed in a checked shirt and neat pants…

"Isabelle? Is everything okay now? I did what you said and stayed inside but now the demons are-"

Before Max had even finished his sentence, Jonathon had grabbed him by the hand and pulled him in front of his body, a wicked and manic grin on his face. I finally saw what the object in his hand was. It was a shiny seraph blade that hadn't been summoned and it was like none that i had seen before.

"_Xaphan_," he hissed and the blade shot out, the razor sharp serrated edge grazed against my brother's throat.

"Do you know who _Xaphan_ was? He was the angel of Invention. He suggested to the rebel angel's that they set fire to heaven. Fitting for me, don't you think?"

"Yes, because like Xaphan you're going to be sent to the bottom of the abyss, where you belong." Jace hissed.

"Ah, Gabriel, you're so melodramatic."

"Why do you call me that?"

Jonathon simply smiled and craned his neck to look at Max who was struggling in his arms. Mom and dad made to run for him, screaming his name, but Jonathon raised his eyebrows and pushed the blade tighter to his neck.

"_Striking_ family resemblance, I have to say. Clarissa and I don't have that. She looks like _her_," he nodded his head sharply towards their mother with a look of venom, "and I look like our father."

"Where is Valentine?" Jace shot. Jonathon shrugged.

"He's around somewhere. He had more important business to attend too."

"You mean you're Valentines _son_? We weren't aware he had children." One of the Clave members shouted up.

"Finally, someone gets a clue. Yes, I'm Jonathon Morgenstern and this creature at my feet is Clarissa Morgenstern. Speaking of Clarissa… You have three seconds to decide. You either hand over my sister or your brother gets an early pass to meeting Raziel. either way, i'll be taking her with me eventually." Jonathon said evenly. I glared in horror, vaguely aware of the screaming and foot falls from somewhere behind me, but all I could concentrate on was the knife on Max's throat.

"Isabelle…?" my brother whispered, his lower lip trembling. From the corner of my eye I saw Jace and Alec running at me; I could hear my mother and father screaming blurred words; I could make out that Clary's mom was shouting her name over and over again, but all I could focus on was that knife. It glinted wickedly in the dim twilight, the light of the already risen moon shining off the blade in to my eyes. Time seemed to slow down and I could hear the rapid pulse of my heart pounding in my ears as if someone was banging a drum right beside me. There were no longer clouds of cold air billowing in front of me because I had stopped breathing…

And then…?

Then it was too late.

As clear as glass, I heard Jonathon's words. There was no pretence about them, only a cruel finality that shattered my entire being in to millions of pieces.

"Time's up."

* * *

**I'm sorry! I know. I'm a complete douche for leaving it there! Please don't hurt me **

**On a happier note… Happy Holidays! Review, Review, Review!**


	8. Playing By The Rules

**A/N: Hello and Happy New Year! I'm sorry it took me so long to update but my band has been recording since Christmas and I've been ripping my hair out from the roots over it. But thank you soooo much to everyone who reviewed! I'm sorry I haven't replied to you all. **

**Also, I feel SO embarrassed that I've been spelling Jonathan wrong, but it's my little brother's name and I'm use to spelling it 'Jonathon'. Thanks to shawty94 for pointing that out! **

**This chapter is for Serenity Shadowstar because she gave me the basic idea. I know I changed it a little, but I needed too for it to fit what was coming next. So, the credit goes to you, especially for being able to read the email I sent back. My spelling was awful **

**Anyway. The usual disclaimer: I don't own the Mortal Instruments yada, yada, yada. **

* * *

**CPOV**

The commotion in my ears was almost painful in clarity. I could hear shouting, lots of it, and it cut through my ears like shards of glass to bare skin. My head felt heavy but the compulsion to open my eyes made its self known and I struggled against the drugged haze until I felt my eyelids peeling gradually back. As my eyes opened, the sound around me seemed to gel in to a normal pitch and it no longer hurt to hear noise. I found that I could pick out individual voices; I was certain I could hear Isabelle yelling just above me, my mom screaming some distance away. The one voice I was looking for in the din was completely silent and it sent a spark of terror flying through my entire body that had me pushing my self up on weak arms.

I looked around quickly, desperate to find him in the melee surrounding me but my search was cut short when I caught sight of my brother holding a tiny, messy haired boy at knife point a few steps above me; a sadistic and only half sane smile settled on his face. I could see in his eyes that he was only half there. He had never been capable of that look before our father had his way with him. Ignoring the invisible hand that pushed down on my shoulder and the voice that screamed 'stay down' in my ear, I pulled my self drunkenly to my knees and called out to him.

"Jonathan,"

Even though my voice was horse and brittle, it was commanding enough to make the entire population of the courtyard go quiet. My brother looked down on me, eyebrows raised as though he was surprised I was awake. I noticed his knife press that little bit harder against Max's throat, making a tiny bead of scarlet run like a teardrop down his pale neck. I stood properly, taking a cautious step towards him.

"Let Max go, Jonathan. We both know what you want."

My brother looked at me with unmasked amusement; his head tilted a little ways to the side as he thought about his answer.

"Tell me what I want and I'll let the boy go- for a trade of course." He finally commanded. I nodded and took another step towards him. I could feel the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end as dozens of eyes bored in to me, watching our every move; monitoring our every breath.

"You want me. You want to hand me to father and watch me die when he's finished."

Jonathan barked out a laugh and shoved Max away from him. The young boy tumbled down the steps of the Institute and landed in a ball on the floor, crying silently and clutching on to his neck. Isabelle lunged for him and pulled him against her chest but her eyes followed me. I smiled at her briefly, trying to convey all my thanks and goodbyes in that single look, before Jonathan grabbed me by the arm and dragged me up the steps to his side. I heard a few people crying out my name but their voices were a blur of noise. Jonathan's mouth was against my ear and he was speaking to me in a taunting whisper.

"You're only half right, sister. Father needs the other one and he's the trade I was talking about. You were coming home either way. _He's_ here, you know? The third experiment is here. I'm sure you'll have guessed who he is by now. You seem to know him well enough." He purred and I blanched, finally understanding.

Everything made sense now; _He'd _told me about the third experiment and how Jonathan had been calling him Gabriel. I'd even witnessed him move and jump as though he was flying, but I'd chosen to ignore it. How could I have missed this? All of the information I'd learnt was fitting together in my head like the pieces of a puzzle and a single picture was forming in my minds eye.

"Jace…" I whispered and whirled in Jonathan's grasp as he laughed and toyed with the hilt of his blade. I saw him nodding happily out of the corner of my eye but I was too busy searching for those beautiful golden eyes that belonged to the missing piece of the puzzle.

"Yes. Jace." Jonathan said just as my eyes locked with his. He looked more beautiful than ever, wielding his battle scars proudly as though they were medals. He was stood apart from the crowd, one of his hands outstretched towards me and pain evident in his eyes. He didn't know what was happening. How could he, if I'd only just been able to put two and two together in what now seemed to be a glaringly obvious puzzle? He had no idea of what was to come, but then again neither did I until I head the sound of a blade ripping through the air and I noticed dark stains of blood blossoming across Jace's chest.

He looked down in utter shock at Jonathan's blade lodged in to him, just above his heart. I could hear absolutely nothing anymore- not even the sound of my own heart beat. Jace's eyes lifted from the blade and back to mine, already glazing over. I saw words forming on his glorious mouth, but I couldn't hear what it was he said. The colour was quickly draining from his face, leaving him looking like he was already dead. I knew I was screaming his name over and over again- shouting curses and filthy remarks at my brother as he yanked on the back of my shirt to keep me still, and at the people in the courtyard for standing still as Jace sunk to his knees, his eyes rolling back in to his head. I spotted Alec right beside Jace, unmoving even though is best friend and _parabati_ was dying at his feet. He wasn't even _looking_ at him.

Sound returned to me the instant Jace fell on to his side, twitching on the ground in a gruesome pool of his own blood. Sure enough, my own voice ripped through my ears as I continued to yank away from my brother. He was patting my hair gently now and laughing something at me but his statement fell on def ears. A whole cacophony of noise attacked me in a single rush and it was almost enough to make me black out, but I clung on to reality even though the harsh and bitter taste of loss rang clearly on my tongue. Heavy tears fell from my eyes and my knees buckled beneath me. I clung on to Jonathan's legs like they were a life raft and I was drowning.

He bent down and turned my chin towards his face violently, holding it between his thumb and forefinger.

"Shut it. He's not dead- yet. You never did listen to a word anyone said. Father needs you both alive. Frankly I don't care if he lives or dies but he'll bleed out in a matter if minutes if we don't leave. Now come on Clarissa, before our friends here wake up from the sleep I've put them in."

I looked up at my brother, hiccupping softly as I glared with all the hatred in my heart. That was why no one was moving to help Jace- Jonathan had done something to them.

"Screw you, Jonathan." My voice came out in a growl and I spat at his feet. The smile he sent me was withering.

"Don't be melodramatic. It doesn't suit you." He said with a bored voice before taking hold of my head and smashing it hard against the brick wall of the institute.

I woke up some time later with a throbbing headache and feeling as if I'd been hit by a van. Every muscle in my body seared with white hot pain as I sat up in the bed; I didn't bother to wonder how I'd got there or think about where in fact I was. I'd grown up in this room- everything from the texture of the bed sheets to the scents in the air was familiar. Nothing had changed in my bedroom since the day I'd left Idris, apart from the medical equipment set up at the side of my bed.

I looked over to the bay window as I yanked out the IV drip from the back of my hand without even thinking about what I was doing. The sun was coming up over the emerald green hills just beyond Morgenstern manor, dappling the land with an almost luminous golden light. For a moment it felt like I'd never left this place. It was easy to lose my self to the striking pang of homesickness that crept up on me before I realised just exactly what being home meant. I felt my face shift in to a look of determination as I swung my legs out of bed and marched to the door, ignoring the fact that I was stumbling. There was a pretty blue dress hanging from my wardrobe but I ignored it after a second, deciding that my father would probably take me more seriously if I left on my ripped but dirty Shadowhunting gear.

I threw open the door and stormed down the corridor, intending on going to my fathers study. I could walk the hallways of the manor blindfolded, and it was a good job because I was almost blind with rage. I couldn't believe I was here again- and that Jace had been dragged along too. My heart ached at the thought of him. I wondered where he was in the house and if he was okay after my brother had almost killed him. Jonathan had said Jace would be okay, but I wasn't inclined to believe him when I hadn't seen him with my own eyes.

I descended the stairs two at a time, taking in the familiar house as I did so. I was about to pass through the entrance hall when I was stopped by someone calling my name.

"Miss Clarissa?"

I stopped and turned towards the maid who'd stopped me. She hurried towards me, the dress from my wardrobe hanging neatly from her arm.

"Yes, Joanna?"

"Your father requests that you dress before breakfast." She said, ducking her head as though she was scared of me. I suppose she was, after all the things I'd done in the past. I raised an eyebrow and shook my head.

"You can tell _father_ where he can shove his request. In fact, I'll do it my self. Where is he?"

"Mr Valentine told me not to tell you that. He wishes to speak to you over breakfast in the dining room." Joanna mumbled. I huffed loudly and glared at her through tight eyes.

"If you won't tell me where my father is, tell me where they took Jace. I want to see him."

"Beg your pardon, Miss Clarissa, but I don't know who this Jace is."

"Don't lie." I spat. She opened her mouth to reply but was cut off by another voice.

"She's not lying. Do as you're told, Clarissa." Jonathan said. He was running his seraph blade over his nails, shaping them with his weapon as he leaned nonchalantly against the doorframe.

"Where have you taken him?" I demanded. Jonathan just smiled and started to walk away. I caught up to him easily and grabbed him roughly by the shoulder. He looked down at my hand and shrugged it off, turning his glaring eyes to mine.

"I wouldn't provoke me, if I were you." he told me in a low voice full of menace, "The odds are in my favour Clarissa. I know where your boyfriend is and you know damn well that I won't hesitate to hurt him if you don't start playing by the rules."

"Don't you touch him or I'll-"

"You'll what? Spit on me again?"

"I'll kill you." I promised. He laughed loudly and threw his arms out at his side.

"Look around you, Clarissa. There are guards and security wards all over this damn house. Check your ankle- you have a rune on it that let's father track your every move. You can't leave the house; you can't get in to most of the rooms without permission and accompaniment otherwise that little beauty will shock you in to tomorrow. And you think you can get to me? Of course you can't. I'm not scared of you, little sister. Now run along and put your pretty dress on before I start playing God." With that, he turned on his heel and disappeared out the door, leaving me seething in the hall. I grabbed the first thing I could find and threw it angrily at the wall, ignoring Joanna's scared gasp as the vase shattered in to a hundred pieces. I yanked the dress out of her hands and told her to follow me to my room.

It was six thirty by the time I was washed and dressed. Joanna pushed me towards the mirror and I observed my reflection with dead eyes. There was not a scratch on my face, even though I knew I should have had some scars after the battle. Joanna had styled my hair in to meticulous curls and had scraped half of it up in to a twist that was held together with a silver slide. The midnight blue tea dress suited me, but I didn't appreciate it. I knew what my father was doing. It was part of his game. He'd dress me up in pretty clothes, have me do whatever he wanted to get me 'playing by the rules' as Jonathan had said and then he'd play his ace. Well, I knew what was going on and I wouldn't- I couldn't- afford to lose this game. Not with so much at stake.

I slipped my feet in to a pair of white ballerina pumps and left the room, Joanna following me like a shadow.

"You don't have to follow me. I know my way around my own house." I snapped without looking back at her.

"I'm sorry Miss Clarissa but Mr Valentine gave me strict orders to escort you to the dining room."

"Of course he did," I muttered darkly as I descended the stairs. I knew I was being awful to Joanna and she didn't deserve that- my father was her boss and she had to do as he said, but it was irritating having to be escorted around your own home.

I thanked her quietly when we reached the doors to the dining room. She mumbled something that sounded like 'you're welcome' and took a step back, fiddling with the hem of her shirt nervously. I took a deep breath to prepare myself and then pushed open the doors.

My eyes travelled immediately to the chair at the head of the table and I got my first glimpse of my father since I'd left Idris for New York. He had the ability to do that; to make him self the commanding feature of a room. I had to give him that one thing- he definitely knew how not to be a wallflower.

He looked the same as ever- his almost white hair styled neatly on his head and his overly attentive grey eyes boring in to me as though he was conducting an x-ray. He wore a sharp, expensive looking grey suit and sat with his chin in one hand, and a small black object in the other. I stood stiffly in the doorway and looked impassively back at him, trying to hide the sick feeling of dread that suddenly washed over me like a wave from the sea. He didn't break my gaze for a long moment before he blinked and leaned back in his chair, a lazy smile on his lips.

"Clarissa. It's wonderful to see you again." he said, his voice as smooth as silk. I raised an eyebrow and scoffed.

"I wish I could say the same, father, but I'm sure you are aware of my feelings towards you." I replied evenly, never breaking our eye contact. He smiled again and motioned for me to come further in to the room. I did, but I sat in the chair furthest away from him. I wasn't surprised to feel the presence of two people moving up behind me.

"Keeping an eye on me, are you daddy?" I asked in a sickly sweet voice, a venomous smile creeping on to my mouth. He inclined his head with a grin.

"Well after your last disappearing act I think its best I know what you're doing."

"So why not lock me up? That way you can have me walled up and free to watch twenty four-seven."

"And keep you prisoner in your own house? Do you really think that little of me, Clarissa?" he asked with fake sincerity in his voice. I snorted with amusement.

"For the record, I do think that little of you. Locking me up would be better than what you're doing now. At least then I wouldn't have to put up with the bite of freedom you're giving me."

"You can have your freedom back if you do as I ask."

I quirked up my eyebrows.

"No, thanks. I'd rather be a prisoner." I said, my tone dry.

"Even if Jonathan's like depended on it?" he asked seriously.

"I don't care about my brother. He can rot in hell with you, for all he's become."

"I didn't mean your brother."

It clicked then; he was talking about Jace. I shuffled in my chair and shot my father a disgusted look. I thought he was above blackmail, at least.

"Where is he?"

"In the basement room."

"I want to see him."

"Later."

"Now." I half yelled, and stood up from the chair. A pair hand hands landed firmly on my shoulders and pushed me none to gently back in to the seat.

"We have things to discuss, Clarissa."

"I have nothing to talk to you about. I won't make the rune for you and there is nothing you can say to make me change my mind."

I saw the flash of anger streak through his features as he slowly stood from his chair to walk to where I sat. He bent down so his eyes were level with mine; clouded grey meeting emerald green in the same jet black stare.

"Do as I say, Clarissa." He whispered threateningly. I blinked slowly before replying.

"Make me."

Very slowly, my father straightened up and raised the black object in his hand to his mouth.

"Bring me the warlock, Jonathan." He spoke in to it, his eyes never leaving mine. We kept up the staring contest for a few minutes before my brother entered the room behind a cat eyed warlock. I saw with distain that he was being lead at knife point.

"Ah, Elias. Fantastic. I need you to do something for me."

I watched the exchange through wide eyes. My brother flashed me a sinister smile as he jabbed Elias towards me, ignoring the warlocks cries of pain. The men behind me took hold of my shoulders again and I realised too late that something terrible was about to happen. I thrashed and struggled in my chair, but no matter how hard I fought, I couldn't escape their iron grasp. I was vaguely aware that Elias was muttering words under his breath but they didn't register.

"This'll only hurt a little, Clarissa." Jonathan smiled as the warlock put his fingertips to my forehead. All at once I felt a great blinding pain and I jerked back in my seat. A high pitched squealing noise rang through my ears, making me think my head was about to explode. I put my hands uselessly over my ears and cried out in pain as my vision was obscured by a bright white light. The squealing in my head rose to a pinnacle and I felt my mind slipping away.

The last thing I remember was screaming Jace's name at the top of my lungs before I slid away in to dreams of gold.

**JPOV**

I woke up to a sharp kick in the ribs.

"Wakey, wakey princess!" a familiar voice called out to me as their foot reconnected with my abdomen. I took in a gasping breath of cold air and it stung my chest like I'd just swallowed white hot embers. I struggled with my mind to remember what had happened but I came up short. I shifted on the floor, biting back the groan that rose up in my throat. Everything hurt. I cursed quietly and fell against something solid, jarring my aching chest on impact. Very slowly, I opened my eyes but even that tiny, inconsequential movement made a searing pain slice through my head. Was it even possible for my eyelids to be bruised? I cast my sleepy eyes around what appeared to be a cell and finally noticed the person stood beside me, his cold black eyes looking down on me with undisguised amusement. As soon as I registered those thunderstorm eyes, the memories flooded back to me; hundreds of demons, Clary, Max, Seraph blades and… darkness? I thought for a moment longer before I remembered and flinched away from Jonathan.

"You almost killed me," I hissed. Jonathan rolled his eyes theatrically. He was leaning against the metal bars of my cell looking smug. I looked to his belt and noticed that all three of my seraph blades were resting mockingly at his hip, their familiar hilts glinting in the weak candle light.

"Congratulations Captain Obvious. That was kind of the point."

I growled a sentiment at him that rhymed perfectly with 'ducking banker' and he grinned.

"Potty mouth, are we? I wouldn't swear in front of father, if I were you. He doesn't take too kindly to swearing... thinks it's for people with an extremely limited vocabulary."

"Where's Clary?"

Jonathan grinned. It looked distorted and manic because his face was half cast in shadows.

"Ah. Straight to business. Let's just say that Clarissa is… better off somehow." His grin widened as he watched the horror cross my face.

"If you've hurt her, I'll-"

"Yeah, yeah. You'll kill me. Man, how many times can a guy hear that threat in one day? It's getting kind of boring."

"What the hell do you want?" I snapped, rubbing my head in my rope-bound hands.

"It's not what I want that you should be concerned about; it's what my father wants. If it was up to me, I would have killed you back in that clearing two weeks ago but unfortunately, my father thinks you'll have your uses, what with you having angel blood."

My head whipped up in an instant and I looked at Jonathan disbelievingly.

"_What_?"

He looked at me for a long moment before bursting in to arrogant laughter.

"Seriously? You didn't figure it out? By the Angel, this is too rich."

"You're crazy." I dismissed and moved away from him- well, I shuffled about an inch to my right because that's as far as the ache in my chest would take me. I looked down at the blade shaped hole in my shirt and noticed that there was only a faint white scar in its place. Someone had healed me up, but they'd done nothing for the pain. Still, I supposed it could be worse.

"No, I'm not crazy but you, my angelic friend, are deluded. Never wondered why you could move so fast? Why you could jump so high? I saw your little display when you jumped over that school fence the night you found me. You have angel blood running through your veins, just like my little sister."

My mouth opened and closed a few times but I couldn't seem to find my voice. Angel blood? Me? He couldn't be serious. I heard him tut as he approached me again, this time with a seraph blade out and pointing at my throat.

"I'm done talking with you. My father wants to see you at dinner; he has a special surprise for you. Lewis will prepare you." he reeled off, sounding extremely bored and impatient. He looked me hard in the eyes and I stared back, a strange resolve settling in my stomach. If Valentine wanted to see me, that would mean I would be taken to the main part of the house. I was almost certain that was where Clary would be… and when I found her?

I'd do everything I could to kill these people and get her to safety.

Just like Jonathan had promised, a man who I assumed was Lewis came to my cell and escorted me to some kind of bathroom. I tried to get some information out of him as I washed myself but he didn't answer. It wasn't until he turned his back on me that I saw the silencing rune at the base of his neck. Valentine really took no half measures. It didn't take me long to get dressed in to the shirt and suit pants Lewis laid out for me and before I knew it, he was leading me through a network of underground passages. My eyes were now covered in a blindfold and hands were bound with electrum wire and I could feel blood starting to seep down my wrists, dripping off my finger tips as a result of my struggling. I didn't really feel the pain. All I could concentrate on was finding Clary and getting her out of here.

Lewis led me by grabbing hold of my arm and yanking me this way and that when I needed to change direction. Some time later I could hear the sound of talking and the mouth watering smell of food. God knows how long it had been since I'd eaten or drank anything. All of a sudden I was washed over with an almost crippling pang of fatigue but I refused to let it show. Showing my weakness would give them more of an advantage over me and I no longer had any implications to be a good boy. I didn't need weapons to kill a man, and as soon as I found Clary I'd put my skills in to action.

Too soon I was roughly shoved in to a seat. Someone yanked the blindfold from my eyes and I winced against the glaring light of what appeared to be a dinging room. There were several chairs set around a grand table loaded with food and jugs of every kind of drink I could imagine. My mouth watered and I bit back a groan.

I was sat at the far end of the table, directly opposite a man with bone white hair and a thin smile on his face.

It could only be Valentine.

Jonathan sat to his right and another man was sat a seat down from him on the left, but his head was ducked so I couldn't see his face. There was something familiar about his posture and the shade of his hair, though. I pushed my speculations aside and returned my steady glare to Valentine even though looking at him made my stomach flip with nerves.

"Jonathan, it's nice to meet you," he said. His voice was polite enough but it was laced with deadly poison; a warning.

"Jace." I said shortly, casting my eyes around the room. There was no sign of Clary.

"Yes, my son informed me of your preferred name."

I said nothing. I was burning to ask where his daughter was, but I kept my mouth stubbornly shut. Valentine laughed lightly to himself and leaned in to his son's ear. Jonathan nodded his head and whipped out something that looked like a cell phone and punched something in to it.

"Do you know who I am?" Valentine asked me. I laughed under my breath, mockingly. Of course I knew.

"You're Valentine, Clary's father."

"You mean Clarissa." Valentine corrected me. I shrugged, trying to look as if I didn't care.

"She should be down any moment." He continued. I shrugged again but it was harder to hide my anticipation and I knew he'd be able to read it in my eyes. There was a time, before Clary of course, when I'd been able to hide my emotions from everyone but in the short time I'd known her she'd smashed down those walls of mine with a sledge hammer and a blatant disregard for my sanity. Jonathan smiled, snake like, at me and tapped his nose.

The look in his eyes screamed _I know something you don't know_.

"Please help your self to the food, Jace." Valentine said as he picked up his knife and fork and indicated the plate of roast pork in front of me. I raised my bound wrists and waved them at him.

"I'm afraid I can't."

"Ah yes. It was just a precaution, you understand? I'd rather not tie up one of my own."

"I don't belong to you." I said as my lip curled angrily back against my teeth. Valentine inclined his head in calm recognition.

"Of course you don't. Hodge, remove the electrum wire, if you would?"

My jaw dropped as the man beside Valentine finally looked up, his eyes wide and fearful. I could see the shame in his face- the realisation that his double agent nature had finally been recognised. He shuffled towards me, his head down, and I bit on my lip to try and keep the fury at bay.

It wasn't working too well.

Hodge didn't say anything to me as he unwrapped the wire from my bleeding wrists. I couldn't stand to look at him, but as soon as my hands were free and I was sure I could feel my fingers, I swung my left fist towards his face and felt his nose collapse below my knuckles. No one moved towards me as I settled my self back in my chair and watched Hodge collapse to the floor. Blood pooled on the flagstone floor and his cries filled the room but still everyone ignored him. I heard Jonathan laughing across the room from me but I didn't look at him. The only person I had eyes for was Hodge. He looked up at me, his hands cupping his broken nose. His eyes told me that he was sorry- that he understood why I'd done what I had- but sorry wasn't good enough any more. There was no forgiving him. He'd betrayed us all and ran back to Valentine and I was pretty damn sure he was the reason Jonathan had found us in the first place.

I turned away from him without a trace of emotion on my face and picked up my knife and fork. Valentine barked orders at his guards to take Hodge from the room so they could fix up his nose and then he turned to me, a strange spark in his eyes.

"You remind me of my self when I was younger. No fuss, no apologies. You know exactly what you want."

I raised an eyebrow and swallowed my mouthful.

"What I want is to know what the hell is going on here." My voice held no trace of emotion.

"You will find out in good time, but for now-"

Valentine was interrupted by the sound of a door slamming. My eyes immediately went to the doorway where a girl was gliding in to the room, her floor length, emerald silk dinner gown flowing beautifully around her slender figure. Her long red hair was stick straight and hanging just above her waist, half of it pulled up in to a delicate up do. She swept around the table and pressed a light kiss to Valentines cheek with a smile then ruffled Jonathan's hair affectionately before breezing to her own chair and sitting down with wide, expectant eyes.

I could barley believe what I was seeing. _What the hell_ was she doing? My cutlery fell with a clatter on to the table and I sucked in a betrayed breath.

"_Clary?_" I managed to choke out. Her eyes wandered to me and her thin eyebrows pulled in to a confused frown. She shot her father a quick look before replying.

"I'm sorry. Do I know you?"

* * *

**There, I didn't kill Max! I'm not that cold hearted, so you can all stop throwing rotten fruit at me now! I hated that CC killed him in City of Glass. But… instead, Clary can't remember who Jace is *play overly dramating dun dun dunnn music here* is all of this getting too Mary Sue?**

**I'm sorry if it's not what you guys were expecting, and that it is so long! And if there are any mistakes, my bad! I did read it over a few times before posting it, but I need new glasses. My brother conveniently stood on my old ones. **

**Review guys, let me know what you think! **


	9. Believe Me Relieve Me

**A/N: I'm sure you are all well aware that I'm not Cassandra Clare by now and that all characters belong to her. **

**Once again, thank you to all my amazing reviewers and all the people who have stuck with me through this. I'm sorry it's taken so long to update. If anyone is interested, there's an authors note at the bottom of the page about why it took so long.**

**Okay, so I have to put out an epic shout out to Serenity Shadowstar. You're great. Thank you for all your help! Without it I'd still be sat chewing my lip over chapter 8.**

**Oh, I just wanted to let everyone know that if anyone needs a beta reader or just someone to read over their work or whatever don't hesitate to ask. It's the least I can do after all this awesome support. **

**Right, this chapter is all JPOV. I hope you like it…**

* * *

**JPOV**

You know when someone punches you in the face and you get that weird feeling of shock before the pain sets in? I felt like that. For a moment- an extremely long moment- I was numb from the tips of my fingers to the end of my toes. And then the pain started.

It was like some invisible hand had taken hold of my heart and squeezed it as hard as they could, like their only aim was to make it burst. I could barley breathe; I was dying a hundred painful deaths all at once. I was drowning. I was burning to death. I was stabbed in the heart. I was staring down the barrel of a mundanes gun with no way of escape. I was facing a horde of greater demon's unarmed and alone.

Who'd have thought, after all I'd done in my life already, that six measly words from the mouth of one tiny girl would be the thing that finally broke me? If you'd have told me a few weeks ago that this would happen, I would have laughed in your face and called you a few choice names, but now? Now laughter seemed like an entirely foreign concept.

_I'm sorry. Do I know you?_

Clary was staring at me with one eyebrow quirked up, a look of confusion on her face. She was completely oblivious to the fact I was straining back a sting in my eyes. Was I… crying?

_No, _I chided myself_, don't be an ass. Of course you're not crying. There's just something in your eye… _

How was it even _possible_ that she didn't know who I was? I looked to Valentine quickly, my hands fisted at my sides, but he showed nothing in his face. He wore a mask of carefully constructed impassiveness- not even a hint of emotion in his eyes unlike his son. Jonathan was smiling politely between Clary and me, but there was a gloating twinkle in his eyes that gave him away. I turned back to Clary, disgusted that her own family would sink this low.

"I'm Jace…" I said lamely. What else _could_ I say? Somehow I didn't think screaming 'Clary I'm the guy who's completely in love with you' across the dinner table would help me much. There it was again, though. That word. Love. It didn't make me feel happy to admit it now, it made me feel sick. I hadn't told her that I loved her and now she didn't remember me.

Karma's a _bitch_.

Clary was still looking at me blankly and it was like a slap in the face. There wasn't a trace of recognition in her expression. I wondered what the hell they'd done to her.

She looked to her brother for a moment before her eyes widened. She turned back to me, smiling a little.

"Are you one of Jonathan's friends? It's nice to meet you Jace. I'm Clarissa."

I didn't reply. I _couldn't_ reply. Jonathan was shaking with silent laughter and I shot him a look that any normal man would have ran away from. He met it evenly with a look of his own.

Valentine spoke up then, clapping his hands together with a thin smile.

"Jace will be staying with us for a while, Clarissa. It will be your job to _attend_ to him."

I didn't like the way he emphasised the word attend, or the way Clary's eyes lit up at the mention of it. A slow smile spread across her face and in that moment she looked so alarmingly like her brother that I wanted to be sick.

"What's he done?" she asked. Her voice was low but excited and the sick feeling in my stomach intensified. For a moment I was sure that the small amount of food I'd eaten was going to make a bid for freedom.

"Mr Wayland has threatened to expose the Circle's plan to the Clave. I want you to show him what we do to people who think they can get away with that."

_What?_ I thought. I hadn't done that. I didn't even know what the bloody _Circle_ was! The only reason I was here was because Valentine thought I could be useful to him. I looked to Clary desperately but flinched away from the glare she shot me.

"The Clave? What a joke. Like they'd be able to do anything, even if they did understand what was really going on. They're weak, the whole lot of them. They don't know what it takes to be a real Shadowhunter." She bit out. My eyes widened but she turned away almost immediately and tucked in to her meal.

"What have you done to her?" I hissed at her father. He merely smiled and shrugged lightly.

"I don't understand what you mean, Mr Wayland."

"You know exactly what I mean!" I yelled. This time when I stood from my chair, several hands pushed me firmly back in to it and the pressure on my shoulders didn't leave even when I'd stopped struggling.

"Father, would you mind if I…?" Clary jerked her head towards me, her eyes angry slits.

"Of course," Valentine waved his hand in a way that said 'go ahead; do whatever you like'. Clary smiled a tiny bit and stood from her seat before sweeping over to where I sat. As she got closer I could smell her now familiar scent. I blinked furiously again- damn allergies- and willed the flipping in my stomach to stop.

She stopped right in front of me and gave a meaningful look to the people who held my shoulders. When the pressure left, Clary lifted up the hem of her dress so it didn't trail on the floor and bent down in front of me, her eyes level with my own.

"Mr Wayland- Jace, was it? No one, and I mean _no one_, talks to my father with that tone." She took hold of my chin in her hands and held it tightly. I stiffened against her violent touch and I could have sworn some foreign emotion swept across her face. But then she looked up in to my eyes and her expression was dead. Her usually emerald green eyes were now a kind of flat moss colour that conveyed no emotion what so ever. Slowly, she pulled out a seraph blade from the holster around her calf and held it gently against my upturned neck.

"Do I make my self clear?" she muttered. I didn't reply so she tightened her grip on my face.

"I asked if I made my self clear." She said with more force. I brought my eyes back down so they were level with hers before I answered.

"As glass," I said, and no- that hitch in my voice didn't sound _anything_ like a sob.

"I thought so." She purred with a half smile and let the flat of the blade run across my throat in a kind of mock caress before she pulled it away and swished back to her seat.

"So father, where is Hodge?"

It wasn't long after the exchange that I was handed over to Jonathan to be escorted back to my cell, closely followed by Clary who had demanded to see where I was being held. I was pushed and kicked and mocked all the way back but, for once, I couldn't find it in me to protest. I felt nothing but a deep set weariness that I'd never experienced before and it had me staggering under the weight of my own body.

Clary watched me like a hawk; her eyes keen and studying every movement her brother and I made. Her thin eyebrows quirked when Jonathan kicked me to the floor again and again, but she did nothing to stop it. Instead, she fiddled with the hilt of her new seraph blade. I had a brief moment to examine it when they stopped to bark orders at some men in black robes and I saw that in the hilt there were carvings of angels with destroyed wings. Fallen angels. The crystal blade glowed a deep crimson in her hand; the colour of freshly spilled human blood.

I didn't know who she was any more.

Did she even know?

A million and one questions soared through my head all longing to be answered, but I could barley keep my eyes open, never mind think straight. I just wanted this mess to be over. As cliché as it sounded, I wanted to wake up in my bed at the Institute to find out it was all a dream, and that Clary was still Clary, instead of Clarissa Morgenstern. I wanted to be _myself _again instead of the weak, useless boy I was acting like now.

"Home sweet home," Jonathan finally announced in a sing song voice. I looked in to the cell and thought I'd never seen anywhere so glorious in my life. I just wanted to sleep and even the hard, cold flagstone floor looked as comfortable as a king sized bed right now. I went to stumble through the open gate but I was stopped by a crisp voice.

"Wait,"

Clary stepped past Jonathan and grabbed hold of the back of my shirt so she could spin me around. She was holding a stele in her hand, her expression unreadable.

"Hold still," she demanded as she began unbuttoning my dress shirt. I couldn't even find it in me to make some sarcastic remark- yeah, that's how bad it was. She put her stele to my chest and began drawing a rune there, her marking surprisingly light and painless.

"What are you doing, Clarissa?" Jonathan hissed, trying to knock her stele from her hands. She held fast without even damaging the rune.

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm healing him you idiot." She bit back; brushing his hand away like it was a pest. I looked down and sure enough she was tracing an _iratze_ across my flesh.

"I got that. What I meant to say is _why the hell_ are you doing that?"

Clary gave him a look as deadly as any poison.

"He's my toy, not yours. I can do what I like with him. Besides; you know I like them healthy when the games start." She said with a certain amount of pride and eagerness lacing her tone. Jonathan rolled his eyes and turned his back on her.

When she was finished, she pushed me backwards in to my cell without another look. I watched her brother lock the gate with his stele before turning to leave but Clary shook her head and fell neatly to her knees, her stele brandished. She began drawing something complicated on the ground and her brother and I peered at it- him with curiosity and me with… absolutely no feeling what so ever.

"Done." She said after a minute of drawing. She grinned wolfishly at her brother as a barrier of white light came up around my cell, surrounding me from every angle.

"What the hell is that?"

"That would be a rune that stops anyone from entering or leaving the cell. Everyone except me. I've decided it's called a 'keep your filthy hands off him' rune. What do you think?" she explained, before shooting me a meaningful look that I couldn't be bothered to interpret and leaving with a swish of emerald silk.

"She's really something when she's a Morgenstern, isn't she?" Jonathan asked me a minute later. He leaned nonchalantly against the wall beside the door leading in to the tunnel network below the house. I didn't even bother encouraging him with an answer; I just slumped against the floor and closed my eyes. I heard him growl and move towards me- he wanted me to provoke him.

"Don't you dare ignore-" he started, but he didn't get to finish his sentence. His pained yell filled the room and rebounded off the walls, making an eerie chorus of echoes. My eyes flew open in time to see him nursing a burnt hand a few metres away from the barrier Clary had set up. He mumbled a few choice swear words under his breath as he examined the angry welts forming along his wrist.

"At least we know her goddamned rune works," he spat. I smiled grimly and closed my eyes again.

"Don't tell me you didn't expect it too."

"You're not in any position to be a smart ass. Do you really want to end up the same way your father did?"

"My father killed himself." I said tiredly.

"I wasn't talking about Stephen Herondale."

I looked up slowly, my eyes narrowing at Jonathan.

"What do you know about Michael Wayland?" I asked quietly.

"Only that my father isn't afraid to murder a Shadowhunter when he doesn't get what he wants. Don't think you'd be any exception just because he had a hand in making you what you are."

***

I spent the next two days slipping in and out of consciousness. I was given food- meagre scraps of dried meat and oats- twice a day and by the time the third day came around I was feeling ravenous. The only positive I could find from the situation was that at least Clary had healed me up before she left me down here. I didn't want to imagine what it would have been like if I'd had to fight off fractured bones and infected cuts on top of the bitter chill and starvation. For the entire time I stayed put in my corner, only moving to use the bathroom once a day. I hadn't even tried to find a way to escape. Something deep within me told me I needed to stay put; one name sang through the blood in my veins like a broken record.

I didn't think about what might be happening to her up in the house- if anything was happening at all. The fact that she wasn't near made my chest ache but not nearly as much as when I remembered that she was near, but she wasn't Clary anymore. More than anything I wanted to know what the hell they'd done to her because if I did, I'd be able to get rid of the whispering voice in the back of my mind that said she was doing this out of her own free will.

By the third day I'd finally submerged from the drowning sense of emptiness and I was feeling furious. It felt good to feel the acidic flare of anger coursing through my veins. I was like a drug addict finally getting a hit after days and days of going cold turkey, and I was feeling dangerous. I shouted and swore until my voice was horse, punched the wall of my cell until my knuckles bled freely. The whispering in my head slowly morphed in to an insistent scream, so not only was I angry but I was bitter too. Clary had fooled me. She must have known about my angel blood and that was why she got close to me. It all made so much sense in my head; the Clary I'd seen at dinner wasn't the lie at all. The lie was what she had been in front of the Lightwoods and me. That thought only made me scream and punch harder. At one point I bit so hard on my lip that I split the skin. I licked the blood away with the tip of my tongue but instead of tasting the iron tang of blood I could only taste bitter betrayal.

Finally, after of hours of venting at the top of my voice, someone finally came to see what was going on.

"Jace?"

The voice was familiar. I stood up and went as close to the protective field around my cell as I dared; I knew I looked murderous. Hodge floated a little ways back from the bars with his hands stuffed in his battered suit jacket pockets. His face was shadowed with bruises and his eyes looked more haunted than I'd ever seen them. For a moment I forgot how pissed I was and gave in to a rare flare of sympathy.

"What the hell have they been doing to you?" I asked. Hodge winced, as if he was trying to avoid that topic of conversation. With great effort, I saw him arrange his swollen mouth in to a grimacing smile.

"Nothing I can't handle."

I let out a shaky laugh.

"Right. Who did it?"

Hodge looked at me for a long moment before taking a step towards me.

"I know what you're thinking. It wasn't Clary. She isn't like that." He said; his voice dead serious. I snorted to hide the fact that I was shocked he knew what I was too scared to ask.

"Isn't she? She held me at knife point a few days ago then sealed me in this cell. Who knows what she's like?" I said bitterly. Hodge shook his head slowly and threw a glance over his shoulder before stepping as close to my cell as possible.

"Clarissa might have done a lot of bad things in the past, but I promise you-" he began in a whisper but I cut him off with a wave of my hand and a look of disgust.

"Your promises mean nothing to me, Hodge. Not after what you've done. I have to say, I commend you both for your acting skills. They're fantastic. You both had us all fooled." I said but my voice hitched at the end of the sentence.

"I know you're angry at me. You have every right to be. You must have guessed I was working for Valentine all along, yes?"

"Of course I have." I spat. He didn't react.

"And do you want to know what I've been doing?"

Of course I did, but I wasn't going to tell him that. Instead, I shrugged my shoulders and turned my back on him.

"I imagine you're going to tell me anyway, so go ahead."

"I've been passing information about you back to Valentine."

"Why?"

I heard Hodge sigh behind me.

"There was a reason you were passed to Michael Wayland. He was close to Valentine and was trusted enough with your upbringing to keep you without Valentine having to adopt you himself. For a while he updated Valentine on your progress- you were an exceptional Shadowhunter for your age. No child should have been able to run as fast as you could, or jump as high. Valentine knew that the angel blood had taken effect in you straight away."

I turned around again, my eyes slits.

"How the hell did he manage to get angel blood in me anyway?"

"Your parents let him."

For a second my heart stopped- what had he just said?

"You can't be serious. Why would they do that?" I asked before my memory caught up to me. Something Jocelyn had said a few days before…

"_Valentine was best man at your parents wedding and Stephen asked him to be your God Father."_

"They were best friends." I said darkly, casting my eyes to my shoelaces.

"Yes." Hodge confirmed before carrying on.

"As you grew older, Michael truly grew attached to you. He loved you like his own flesh and blood. Eventually, after hearing about your miraculous performances in training, Valentine wanted to take you in as his own. Don't look surprised. You know how much he values his possessions. Michael refused to hand you over."

"So Valentine killed him."

"Not personally. He might be twisted, but he has never killed a man. He has people to do that for him."

Somehow, that made me feel no better.

"So he's a coward as well as a sick bastard?"

Hodge shrugged indifferently.

"You could say that. Valentine wanted you more than anything and he was furious when the Clave got you before he could take you himself. He lost track of you for five years- that was until he suspected Jocelyn of planning to run to her connections in New York and he stationed me there to spy on her. You have no idea how shocked I was when I found you at the Institute. You look just like Stephen. There was no mistaking you, especially after I'd seen you train. I've been feeding information on you since then."

I closed my eyes very slowly and shrank down the wall, my fists in tight balls.

"And then he sent Clary there after me. It makes sense now."

"Jace, that isn't why Clary came to New York,"

"Then why did she?" I yelled, slamming my bloody fists against the floor.

Hodge was quite for a long moment before he smiled to himself.

"You're in love with her, aren't you?"

"What? No- of course I'm not. Don't be ridiculous." I spluttered too quickly and the words sounded false even to me. The lie rested bitterly on my tongue as nothing but silence rang through my ears.

"You are. I see it in your eyes when you talk about her."

"Obviously your eye sight isn't what it used to be." I muttered defensively, but my heart wasn't in it.

"What I don't understand is if you are in love with her, why are you so eager to believe that she was putting on an act? I know your life hasn't been easy, but not everyone is out to get you. Is it so hard to trust even one person?"

"The only people who trust are the ones who are willing to get stabbed in the back." I said in a monotone.

"Think about this Jace. Think about what you're telling your self and then think about how ridiculous it sounds. Clary isn't-"

"Clary isn't what?" a new voice said. Both of us looked to the doorway to see the petite red head in question looking at us with her eyebrows rose. Her hair was back to its usual curls and she was dressed in traditional Shadowhunter gear, armed from head to foot with weapons. She looked more beautiful than ever, but never had she looked more dangerous. I took an involuntary step back and looked away.

When neither of us replied, I heard her let out a sigh.

"That's enough Hodge. I'd like you to leave now."

I looked up at Hodge as he cast a glance at me. There was only one word to describe the look in his eyes.

_Goodbye._

Clary watched as he left and closed the door behind him, whipping out a stele and drawing a rune in the centre of the door. Very slowly, tiredly, she turned back around to face me and our eyes met. There was none of that foreign hostility in her green eyes now- in fact they were brimming over with tears. She half ran, half tripped to the door of my cell and collapsed ungracefully to her knees and reached out hesitantly towards her barrier of light. As her fingers stroked the strange force field, it shattered around her, falling like wisps of smoke in to the air. Her tiny hand reached through the bars of my cell towards me.

"Jace," she whispered. Her voice was barley a whisper and fat tears rolled silently down her gaunt white cheeks. She looked physically ill- not at all like the powerful Shadowhunter I'd seen just a few das ago. The sight of her ripped me in half. I took another step backwards. She followed me with a painful expression then dropped her head and gripped on to the iron bars, her entire body shaking with sobs.

"I'm sorry," she said the words over and over again, each time sounding more desperate than the other. Eventually I had to stop her because the war waging in my head was meeting a brutal stalemate. Half of me wanted to reach out and wrap my arms around her, believe that it wasn't another part of her act, but the other half demanded me to listen to reason. She'd lied to me once already, either way. How was I supposed to know this wasn't just another part of her lie?

"Stop it." I said forcefully. Our eyes met again and in that second I knew that whatever the outcome of this, I wasn't going to be the same person I had been before, and neither was she. We looked at each other through the bars of my cell and I realised with grim understanding that the divide between us could very well be permanent. The thought hurt so much that I had to gasp for air.

"Why are you down here?" I asked quietly. Clary wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and swallowed.

"I'm here to help you."

"And what if I believe you? What then?" I asked, looking her full on in the eye. She held my gaze fast, unblinking and not moving.

"The last thing I want to do is hurt you Jace. You have to believe that, if nothing else."

"Right now I don't know what to believe. Who are you? Do you know?" I asked seriously. I wanted more than anything to believe her when she said she wanted to help, but she had acted like a yoyo; going backwards and forwards between personalities.

"I'm Clary," she breathed, fresh tears spilling.

I moved towards her and crouched by the bars so our faces were almost touching.

"What was going on upstairs? What did they do to you? Why were you acting like that? You can't expect me to just believe you straight away, Clary. I need some answers."

"Father tried to have a Warlock erase my memories. I made them think it had worked. They have to think I don't remember anything that's happened. Hodge is the only one who knows the truth." She whispered, looking at the floor. I placed the tip of my index finger under her chin and gently lifted her face so she was looking at me. The look of utter pain on her face almost floored me.

"Why didn't it work?"

"Because of this," she said and lifted the hem of her shirt to reveal and inky black rune against the alabaster skin of her stomach. It was a network of circles and crosses that formed to make something unlike anything I'd ever seen before. I drew my eyes from her skin and looked in to her eyes. She looked pleadingly at me and I felt the fissures in my heart melt together.

I rested my palm hesitantly on top of one of her hands and used the other to pull her shirt back down.

"What does it do?"

"It makes me immune to any curse a Warlock could place on me. I drew it when my father first sent me after Downworlders, thinking it was just another little bit of protection. I had no idea how useful it would become. When the Warlock tried to erase my memories, the rune absorbed all of the magic. I passed out because it hurt so much, but they thought it was because the spell had worked. I've been fooling them since. Jace, you have to believe me. This is who I am."

"If I believe you, will you tell me everything? I have to know." I asked, but I knew deep down I'd believed her all along. I just couldn't see it through the blind haze anger and betrayal had cast over my eyes.

"Yes. Everything."

I nodded slowly to my self and grasped her hand properly in mine. She watched me through the bars of my cell and then squeezed her eyes together tightly. When she opened them again, she was looking at the floor.

"Everything, starting with this. Jace… I love you."

I couldn't speak, but my body reacted instinctively. I closed the gap between our faced and kissed her hard through the gap in the bars. She met the kiss with equal force. It was desperate and I could feel the wetness of her tears on my cheeks. I brushed them away without losing the connection with her mouth and let my hands wander to her hair. I ran my fingers through the silky curls and tried to pull her closer, but the bars wouldn't let me. Instead I broke the kiss and cupped her cheek in my palm and looked her dead in the eye.

"I love you too."

* * *

**A/N: So there it is. Now for the reason it's taken me so long to post.**

**So I moved in to my new house with my flatmates a few weeks ago, and it was hectic. I've also had essays and stuff due in, so that kept me kind of busy. But I can manage all that and write too. The reason I haven't updated in a while was that the day after I moved in, one of my good friends died. It was awful, unexpected, and terrible. As you can imagine, I didn't feel up to doing much. The funeral was last week and it was one of the most morbidly beautiful things I've ever seen. Since then I've been sorting my head out and tonight I sat at my computer and finally finished off this chapter. It was pretty much finished, anyways.**

**But that's the reason. I know this chapter isn't great, but I'm sure you all understand. **

**Thanks for reading, the next chapter will be up ASAP. I'm also going to be posting the first chapter of my new story 'All's fair when love is war' in the next week. It's AH, J/C and kind of OOC. Be great if you checked it out. Review and all that.**

**ML**

_No man shows greater love than when a man lays down his life for his beloved._


	10. Doppelganger

**A/N: I'm not CC but I really wish I was!**

**SORRY FOR THE EPIC FAIL ON THE UPDATE! It's been what? A month? More? I don't even remember the last time I thought about posting something for this haha.**

**Okay, so thank you to everyone who has read, reviewed, and to those who have done both. I love the feedback and I'm glad you were all happy about the turn out of the last chapter. Thank you for the condolences about my friend passing away, and don't forget to check out my new story 'All's fair when love is war'- the first two chapters are up. Review review review!**

* * *

**CPOV**

"I don't know where to start," I admitted some time later. I was curled against Jace's side, my fingers firmly laced with his. We were sat outside his cell, leaning against the cold stone wall. He was twirling my stele in his free hand, watching the glint of the dim wall lights against its crystal surface as he waited patiently for me to talk. I didn't deserve his patience. I didn't deserve him, period.

"How about the beginning? I heard it's a pretty good place to start." Jace smiled weakly. I tried to smile back but I knew it was nothing but a weird grimace.

"I'm not sure I know what the beginning is anymore." I muttered. He squeezed my hand gently and shrugged.

"I have some questions, if that would help?"

I nodded and waited.

"Well, could you tell me about the Circle?"

"It's what my father and his people call themselves. They're anti-Clave and formed after my grandparents were killed in Europe by downworlders. My Father-" I paused, suddenly hating the sound of the word on my tongue, "_Valentine _is their leader." I amended.

"What exactly do they do?"

"They kill."

"Who?"

"Downworlders mostly, but Shadowhunters who stand loyal to the Clave have been murdered too. And those who turn traitor to the Circle. Once you're in it, you're in it for life. Anyone who abandons the cause is done for."

"Like my dad. Well, Michael Wayland." Jace sighed quietly. I turned to look him in the eye but he was staring at the bars of his cell, his expression blank.

"What do you mean?"

"Your brother told me that Valentine isn't scared to kill a Shadowhunter when he doesn't get what he wants. He told me not to expect any special treatment just because Valentine put that blood in me and that I'd probably end up the same way Michael Wayland did. Hodge told me that because Michael wouldn't hand me over when they figured the blood had worked, Valentine killed him."

My head whipped around to Jace and I took in the deep frown and the grimacing line of his mouth sadly.

"I know you hate it when I say this, but I'm sorry. My father is disgusting."

Jace shrugged and bit down on his bottom lip lightly, still avoiding my eyes.

"Michael must have known what would happen if he didn't hand me over. I'm just glad he didn't. I can't imagine what I'd be like right now."

To my own surprise, I laughed.

"You'd probably be like me, huh? And my brother; a complete ass and obsessed with our power."

"You're not an ass. Your brother… I could probably come up with some better adjectives to describe him, but I guess 'ass' is as valid as any." He protested, but I could see his mouth curving up ever so slightly. I shook my head with my own smile, which faltered almost immediately. I averted my eyes to the ground and toyed with a speck of dirt on my pants.

"I killed people because I was annoyed at my mom. I ripped them apart like they didn't even matter. You saw what I was like upstairs. That's how I have been for the past few years- how can you tell me I'm not an ass?"

"Okay, so I guess you've done a few dickish things but that's not who you are now, even if it's who you were then. Valentine manipulated you in to thinking it was the right thing to do. You said it yourself- he told you downworlders were trying to kill your mom. If my mom was still alive, I know I'd do everything I could to protect her even if I was majorly pissed at her. Families stand up for each other, no matter what."

I pulled my hand from his, ashamed. There I was, feeling sorry for my self because I couldn't control my emotions and I was forgetting that I did in fact still have two living parents and Jace had none. Fair enough, my family was completely screwed but… they were there and they always had been. Jace had never known his biological parents and Michael Wayland had been killed by my own father.

I felt like complete crap.

"You shouldn't be here." I said quietly and pushed myself from the floor, yanking the stele from his hands.

"Neither should you," he countered pointedly. I wandered to the far wall and rested my head against the cool stone. The temperature helped my headache a little.

"This is my home. These people are my family and therefore my responsibility. I have nowhere else to be."

Jace raised an eyebrow and rose smoothly to his feet. He crossed the room in two strides and took my hands in his.

"You could be with me; at the institute with the Lightwoods. Or with your mom. Anywhere but here."

I grinned wanly and met his eyes.

"That would be nice, but it's impossible. I can't leave here. Not yet. I have things I need to do."

"Like what?" he frowned.

"Like stopping Valentine and Jonathan before they…" I trailed off weakly.

"Before they _what_, Clary? What do they want from you?" he pressed, sensing my hesitance to continue. I sighed and shook my head.

"It's better for you not to know."

"You promised me you'd tell me everything." He said stonily, squeezing my hands tighter in his. The look in his eyes was a fierce, molten gold and I tried to look away, but I just couldn't. With a sigh, I told him.

"Valentine is planning on wiping out all of the Downworlders."

Jace stood perfectly still for a moment before he burst out in to hysterical laughter.

"How they hell is he planning on doing that?" he said through his amusement. I raised my eyebrows and just looked at him. Slowly, his laughter died out and his expression settled in to a frown.

"He's… he's planning on using you, isn't he?" he asked darkly. I nodded and we stared at each other in silence for an immeasurable amount of time.

"No," he said firmly, shaking his head with a small smile.

"There's this rune he wants me to create-"

"No."

"I have to make him believe I'll-"

"_No_,"

"Jace, you need to listen to me otherwise-"

"Dammit, Clary; no!" he yelled, letting go of my hands and taking a step away from me. He was furious.

"Don't even think about being an idiot about this. We need to leave, both of us, _right now_. We need to tell the Clave what's happening and we need to get back to the institute and your mom and my family and maybe we can stop him some other way. There has to be another way." He said quickly, his voice pleading and his eyes wild. I shook my head.

"There is no other way, Jace. I'm staying here to carry on with my plan, and you're going back to New York where you belong."

"You're plan?" Jace laughed, "God this must be good. Go on then, enlighten me. What is this genius plan of yours that's going to get you killed?" his voice grew steadily louder until he was almost screaming. I slammed my palm against his mouth, effectively shutting him up.

"Be quiet or we're both going to die. Do you want Jonathan to hear you?" I hissed under my breath. He mumbled illegibly against my palm before taking me by the wrist and pulling it away so I couldn't understand him.

"I want him to hear me. I want to kill that bast-"

"By the Angel, Jace. Shut the _hell_ up!"

Jace and I stared at each other for a long time.

"Are you going to listen to me or do I need to _make_ you?" I asked. My voice was low and angry. Jace took in a deep breath through his nose and folded his arms; waving one of his hands in a way that said 'Go ahead. Entertain me'.

"Right. This is how it's going to go down. First, I need to get you out of here and back to New York. I'm going to create a portal and I'm going to send you through it, and you're not going to argue with me."

"If you think I'm going to leave you here-"

"I said _you're not going to argue with me_ Wayland! Is that clear?" I growled through my teeth. I'd known this would be difficult, but damn I didn't expect him to be this uncooperative. Jace nodded with tight eyes and I carried on.

"Before you leave, I'm going to put a copy-cat rune on you so we can fool Jonathan for a little longer. It won't last forever but it will buy me some time to get to my father. I'm going to make him believe that I'm going to make that rune for him, and then I'm going to try and kill him. Then I'll need to move on to Jonathan. He'll be harder because of the demon blood, but I have a plan. Meanwhile, you're going to go back to the Institute, gather everyone you can and persuade the Clave to set up a direct portal in to Idris. My father has an army of demons he's been controlling and no doubt when he catches wind of what we're up too, he'll send them to war. I want you to stay out of the way of the fight until you feel the shift, and then I need you to come look for me." I finished and sucked in a deep breath. Jace was staring at me like I was speaking to him in Arabic.

"A 'copy-cat' rune? Feel the shift? What the hell are you talking about?" he said bluntly and I rolled my eyes. I didn't have all the damn time in the world to explain this.

"A copy-cat rune is something I've been working on. Right now there is a copy of me walking about the house upstairs. It's how I was able to come down here and talk for so long. I'm going to put that rune on you so you can escape but to Jonathan and Valentine it will look like you're still here. The copy-cat rune is like an identical body double of you. It moves and talks and has your memories, but it can't feel pain. It's the perfect diversion."

"You're going to make another me?" he asked dubiously as his eyebrows pulled together.

"Something like that." I nodded. He remained quiet for a long moment before he looked up.

"So why not just keep that other you here and you come back with me?"

"The doubles can't think for themselves. They do as their told. Imagine if I left it here alone and Valentine told it to draw the rune? I have to stay. I need to do this." I said as I traced my stele along the stone wall in the familiar shape of the portal rune. I felt Jace step up behind me and the familiar feeling of his warm breath on the back of my neck.

"This is insane, Clary."

I nodded and stepped back from the metallic swirling mass of the forming portal so I was flush against his chest. He slid his arms around my body and hugged me tightly to him, like he was never going to let me go. I took advantage of the situation and only allowed myself a moment or two to lean in to his embrace before I drew the stupidly complicated copy-cat rune on the unmarked skin at the base of his wrist- in the exact same position as my own. He flinched as my stele touched his skin but didn't pull away until I let his arm go and stepped away again.

I turned just in time to see the strange blurring form of his doppelganger stepping away from his body, and in almost no time at all a completely lifelike Jace was stood beside the original. He bore all of the same marks and bruises as the original, but the vague, vacant look deep in his golden eyes gave him away as a fake. Only someone who paid infinite attention like me would notice just by looking at it.

"Wow, that's… well, creepy doesn't even cut it." Jace muttered as he took an involuntary step away from the double.

"He need's to be beat up a little, but otherwise I think it's a pretty good job." I observed. Jace shot me a look.

"You're going to beat me up?"

"No. Not you personally, anyways." I tried to smile but I knew he was going to have to leave soon. There was only so long I could keep myself holed up down here before people got suspicious of my own double upstairs. I felt a warm, wet trail slide its way down my cheek and brushed the tears away sadly as I stared at my Jace.

"No matter what happens, I love you okay? Don't forget it." I said sincerely, trying to pour all of the emotion I felt in to those few words. Jace seemed to come out of some kind of trance and his face contorted in fury.

"No! I'm not leaving you here. There has to be some other way. There must be another way." He practically begged, gathering my hands up in both of his.

"I've told you, it has to be this way." I whispered to the ground. His hand grabbed my chin none too gently and he jerked it up so I had to look at him.

"Why?"

"I guess that's just the way the fates wrote it." I said somberly as I rose up on to the tips of my toes and brushed my lips softly against his. This kiss was nothing compared to what we'd shared in the past, but somehow it was infinitely more; this one mere whisper of a kiss.

"I love you," Jace said against my mouth and I couldn't help but smile at the sound of the words. He loved me. And I was leaving him.

"Goodbye, Jace. Got to go off most of my family now." I managed to choke out with a grimacing smile. He made to say something else, but I didn't give him the chance. Before he knew what was happening, I pressed hard against his shoulders and he fell through the portal.

In less time it took to take a single breath, he was gone. Suddenly, my entire body felt alert- like my very blood was simmering just beneath the surface like water coming to the boil. It felt pleasant, but it was also like something- a huge something- was suddenly missing from my life. This was what I'd warned Jace of.

_I want you to stay out of the way of the fight until you feel the shift._

The shift. It gave me some comfort knowing that I'd been right when I'd assumed we'd create some kind of blood bond between us. We shared the same Angel's blood and we shared a soul deep connection. That kind of bond was indestructible. I just hoped he'd be able to figure it out with only the feeble explanation I'd hastily written on a piece of paper and shoved in to his jacket pocket earlier.

I was snapped out of my revere when someone cleared their throat indignantly behind me. I span around so I could shoot a tearful glare at the Jace-for-all-intensive-purposes who was looking at me with the exact look of shock, disappointment and loving sadness that Jace had worn before I pushed him through the portal.

"Don't _you_ look at me like that, too." I growled before shoving him none-too-gently in to the cell and closing it tight with locking and protection runes.

I didn't meet the decoy Jace's eye as I marched out of the room to face my father.

* * *

**A/N: This one was far shorter than I usually write, but I'm hoping it was short and sweet. Don't worry if you don't really understand the bond bit at the end, it will all become clear over time. It's not supposed to be entirely obvious yet. I think only Serenity Shadowstar understands it properly- and that's including me and it was my idea! **

**Drop me a review and let me know what you thought!**

_You know we don't have all the time in the world to make the floods seem still. You know we don't have all the time in the world to make the most of this. Just smile like the idiots you are. _

_ -_Floods by Fightstar


	11. Toilet Humor

**A/N: I own nothing but the plot.**

**Thank you for all the amazing reviews and sorry it took so long to post a new chapter. Writers block is a bitch! But on the plus side, I've pretty much finished university until September (I know, right!?) and I managed to get my Leeds Festival ticket within the first half an hour of them being released! Should take a look at the lineup, the Saturday is going to be awesome!**

**Phew, I've had a good week. How's yours been? **

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**JPOV**

"Oomph!"

I landed heavily on my hands and knees, my head bent low and I felt like I was about to be sick all over the all too familiar flagstone floor. I scrambled to my feet before I'd even got my breath back and dived towards the portal. It was almost closed, but I saw a swish of fire red hair on the other side. If I could just reach it in time…

"_Oomph_!"

I hit some invisible barrier full force and flew back in to the air. To tell you the truth, I was getting sick of landing on my ass. That was what? Five times in the last few weeks? I hated getting my ass handed to me, and now it was getting handed to me _by thin air_.

I looked up, rubbing my elbow with a scowl on my face. The portal was gone; Clary was gone, and all I could smell was Izzy's cooking- as if I didn't feel sick enough as it was. Not only that, but I didn't feel quite whole. Something wasn't right… something was missing. I pushed that aside for now and got back to my feet. I rubbed my forehead angrily with my hand, letting out a long string of cusses- most of which were so insane I was sure I'd just made them up on the spot.

I looked around; I was in the main hallway of the institute. No one was around, except for Church who was curled up by the entrance to the residential wing. He was looking at me curiously and I knew that if it was possible, his eyebrows would be raised and he would be laughing. I glared at the cat and nudged him with my foot. He hissed and stood up slowly, stretching out with his claws on show.

"Where is everyone, Church?" I asked him. My voice was gruff. The blue Persian mewled quietly and turned away with an indignant flick of his fail, leading me down the corridor towards the kitchen. I could hear people arguing before I was even anywhere near the door.

"Isabelle, you let go of that ladle right now or I swear by the Angel-" Alec's voice said. I heard a clatter and someone huff.

"Calm down Alec. I'm only making noodles; it's not like they can _kill_ you." Isabelle bit out.

"Do you even realize what you just put in them?"

"What are you talking about? It's just seasoning." Isabelle said as I rounded the doorway. Alec was attempting to wrestle the ladle out of Izzy's hands but he didn't seem to be having much luck. He threw his hands up in exasperation and grabbed a tub from the counter.

"Rat poison, Izzy. You put _rat poison_ in the food!" he waved the tub in front of her face.

"Don't be stupid. I'd never do-"

"Read the damn label!"

Isabelle squinted a little so she could read the writing and I watched, morbidly amused, as her mouth formed in to a shocked 'o'.

"Awh crap…"

"I'm sure you've often wondered why we don't eat your food but I believe you've just got your answer. I didn't think you were the type to off us with poison." I chirped up. I stepped out of the shadowed doorframe and in to the kitchen. Their heads whipped around to look at me, both wearing identical expression of shock.

"Jace!" Izzy screamed after a few seconds of shocked silence and threw herself across the room. She hit my chest with a thud and sent me stumbling backwards in to the wall, her arms almost strangling me from how hard she was squeezing.

"Jace, you look like hell. Thank the Angel you're alright," she cried in to my ear. I took hold of her arms gently and pried her away, standing her at arm's length. She was looking at me with huge, wet eyes and was biting her trembling lip.

"I'm fine. Of course I'm fine." I said firmly and sidestepped her so I could sit heavily on a chair. Alec sat opposite me, completely silent, but the look on his face spoke a thousand words.

"We thought you were dead." Isabelle said. She had her arms crossed tightly around her body and a stray tear had fallen down her cheek.

"I should have been. Jonathan stabbed me. He just missed my heart." There was no inflection to my voice.

"What? Are you okay?" Isabelle gasped. I shot her a dry look.

"Obviously. I'm sat here, aren't I?"

"Jace, this is not the time to-"

"What the hell happened? Out in the courtyard I mean. One minute you were stood next to me and then I blinked and you were gone. You and Clary and her brother. What happened?" Alec interrupted, his face set. I gave him a long look.

"He took us to their manor in Idris. Jonathan did something to everyone. You all just stopped moving. Then he threw his blade at me and the next thing I knew I was in a cell in Idris."

"How the hell did you get away?" Isabelle asked.

"Clary." I shrugged. It hurt my chest to say her name and the weird half empty feeling came back.

"Is she okay? Where is she? Has she gone to the bathroom or something?" Isabelle said, her voice lifting a little. I knew she was excited to see Clary again- she was the closest thing to a best friend she'd ever had, never mind a friend who was a girl. Alec watched me carefully with a frown. It didn't take a genius to know that he knew exactly what I was about to say.

"She's not here, Izzy."

"What do you mean she's not here? She came with you right?" she asked slowly.

"Izzy." Alec warned.

"Jace, where's Clary?" Izzy demanded, placing her hands on her hips.

"She's still in Idris."

"Excuse me?"

"Isabelle, stop it." Alec said stiffly.

"No, I won't. You let her send you back home but you didn't bring her with you? Is that what you're telling me?"

"No."

"Christ, Jace, why didn't you just dig her freaking grave while you were at it!" she screamed in my face. I didn't flinch. I didn't do much of anything really; I just watched her.

"Isabelle!" Alec said angrily, grabbing hold of her wrist but she shook him off and rounded on me again.

"If anything happens to her Jace, I swear on the Angel I'll kill you. I can't believe you just left her there on her own! Why didn't you bring her back with you?" she yelled and I finally snapped.

"You don't know what the hell you're talking about!" I shouted angrily. Every single negative emotion possible was building up inside of me, winding around my chest so tightly that I thought I was about to explode.

"Don't you think I tried to make her come with me? Don't you think I tried everything? It's not like I tied her down and… and forced her to stay with those murderers! She did it herself. She literally pushed me through the fucking portal! Don't pretend you know what's going on, Isabelle. Don't pretend you know what happened at that damn house. You don't have a fucking clue what is happening. None of you do!" I finished with a rattling breath, ignoring the traitor tears that spilled from my eyes. I figured it was the first time either of them had seen me cry.

"Jace…" Alec said quietly but I pushed my way past them and stalked out in to the corridor. I stormed through the institute, following the soft drone of voices that lead me to the Library. I didn't even pause for breath before I furiously pushed open the doors and stepped in to the centre of what seemed to be a Clave meeting.

People's heads turned as soon as they heard me but I didn't pause to think. I marched right up to Robert and Maryse, despite the hands grappling to drag me out and the angry voices telling me to leave.

"There's an army. Valentine is rallying an army of demons against the Clave. We need to mobilize now. Leave as soon as possible." I growled. Maryse stared at me in shock before throwing her arms around me.

"Jace! You're alive." She whispered but I pushed her away as gently as I could. It wasn't the time.

"Yes, but none of us will be for much longer if you don't listen to me."

"What's going on? Where have you been? How did you get here?" Robert asked.

"Just shut up and listen," I said loudly, not caring if it was my respective mother and father and very important Clave members I was talking too. I launched in to the story before any of them had a chance to say a word. I told them about what happened in the courtyard, Valentine's plans to destroy all Downworlder's and un-loyal Shadowhunter's; about Hodge passing information to Valentine about us since he'd been here, about Clary… everything. I told them literally everything I'd learned, including the stuff about Clary and I having angel blood in our veins and Clary's special abilities to create new runes. People gasped and covered their mouths when I let them in on what Valentine wanted to do with Clary, about the rune he wanted her to make, but other faces- the faces of the most important Clave members among us- remained impassive. It was almost like they didn't care. Or worse…

They didn't believe me.

"You must understand, Jonathan," a stiff looking guy with grey hair and piercing blue eyes said once I'd finished, "you can't expect the Clave to begin a war simply on the information given to us by a seventeen year old boy- a boy who has spent the last week in Valentine's care, no less."

"You think I'm compromised? You think I'm lying?" I said tightly. I was many things, but I wasn't a liar.

"It's a possibility. No one knows what really happened with you in Idris. We can't risk lives on your information, and truth be told, I don't trust Valentine's daughter as far as I could throw her. She could be in the scheme herself. She could be helping her father." He said, waving his hand dismissively. I wanted to punch him in the face. Hard.

"I'd appreciate it, Inquisitor Aldertree, if you wouldn't accuse my daughter of treason." Someone spoke from a dark corner of the room, her voice like ice. I looked over to see Jocelyn rising from her seat and stepping from the shadows. Her face was white and gaunt and there were huge dark circles below her eyes, like she hadn't slept in days.

"With all due respect Jocelyn," the inquisitor said thinly, turning his beady eyes on her "you have no right to question my opinion on your daughter. For all we know you could be involved too, just like the rest of your family. It's no secret there is bad blood running through your daughter and son's veins."

To my surprise, Jocelyn smiled. It was painful to watch, but I couldn't turn my eyes away from it.

"You're all blind. You heard exactly what Jace has said- he has first hand information- and you turn away from it like it doesn't matter? If this is the attitude of the Clave, then I'm not sure I want to be a part of it. If you want to stand by and watch as the world burns, do it. Be my guest, but don't expect me or my daughter to burn with it." She growled the last of her sentence and then pushed her way through the crowd towards me. She stood a few inches away, her face empty but her eyes burned with passion. She laid a trembling hand on my shoulder and discreetly placed a seraph blade in my hand. I shoved it up my sleeve immediately.

"Gavreel." She whispered the blade's name to me and I nodded, barley moving, "Help my daughter." She finished before she let go and swept from the room, slamming the door behind her so it rang ominously through the room. I looked at the blade in my hand then to the door, feeling like something monumental had just happened. I was proved right when Aldertree spoke.

"Find her. Put guards on her twenty-four seven- the boy too. This conspiracy has gone too far. I won't stand for it."

* * *

An hour later I found myself barricaded in my room, a Clave guard on each side of my door. It was pretty ironic how I'd gone from being in one prison then almost immediately put in another. It was weird, but I kind of preferred my cage at the manor. At least Clary had been there. Here I was forbidden to talk to anyone because they were convinced my head had been messed with, but really the only heads that were going to get messed up were Aldertree's and the rest of the idiots in the Clave. Believe me; I was going to mess them up _bad_.

I stared at my ceiling for a good two hours, painfully aware that the guard was watching me every second of it. It pissed me off having him in my room. He didn't belong there and he'd rifled through my wardrobe and my draws trying to find some evidence that I was a nut job. All he'd achieved was pissing me off so much that I'd spent the next half hour contemplating the different ways to kill him with a single pair of boxer shorts.

So far I had seventeen.

I rolled over absently, feeling my eyelids finally getting heavy, but the rustling in my pocket kept me alert. I'd noticed it earlier but I hadn't had a chance to reach in and see what it was till now, what with my personal shadow being here and all. I took a quick glance at him, noted that he was staring at the ground (quite possibly asleep on the job. Idiot), and quickly put my hand in my jacket pocket. My fingers came in to contact with a crumpled sheet of paper that I was certain hadn't been there while I was in my cell at the manor. I withdrew my hand just as quickly, a plan already formed in my head.

I swung my legs from the bed, letting them hit the ground with a thump. The guard jolted up, his eyes wide with shock. I waved at him arrogantly and smirked.

"Nice of you to join the party. Nice nap? Hope you weren't having any good dreams." I said, keeping my voice light and joking. For a moment, I felt a lot like my old self. I liked it. The freedom it gave me was… something else.

"I wasn't asleep," he said gruffly, his voice thick.

"No, of course you weren't. People drool while they're awake, too. It's nothing to be ashamed of." I said lightly as I stood up. I watched him wipe his mouth self-consciously and allowed myself to laugh.

"Missed a spot." I tapped his chin and turned towards the bathroom.

The guard frowned and seemed to finally notice that I was on the move.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm going to the can. What does it look like I'm doing?" I said bluntly, nodding to the bathroom door. The guard looked a little confused.

"You can't leave this room." He said.

"I'm not technically leaving the room. I just need to use the bathroom."

"I'm not supposed to let you out of my sight."

I raised an eyebrow and shrugged.

"Hey, if you wanna watch while I pee and…uh… _whatnot_, by all means be my guest but otherwise let me do my business in peace."

The guard turned up his nose and narrowed his eyes at me, as though he was seeing if I was up to something. He must have been a complete idiot because he actually nodded and waved his hand towards the bathroom. I grinned and shut the door tightly behind me.

As soon as I sat down on the (closed) toilet seat, I dug my hand in to my pocket and pulled out a scrappy piece of paper with an unfamiliar scrawl written on it but I only needed to touch it to know who it was from. I took a deep breath and let my eyes wander over the page.

_Jace_, it read, _I'm sorry that it's come to this but you've got to understand that this is the only way we'll have a chance._ _I need you to do what I told you, all of it, and as soon as you feel the shift you have to come looking for me. I can't do this without you._ _If my hunch is right, we share a blood-bond that was activated the moment we met. We share the same angel blood; we have a connection that no one else has. That's how you'll fell it, Jace; you'll feel it in your blood. I hope. _

_I'm sorry for everything. For my family, for leaving you, for everything. But you'll see me again whatever happens. Promise._

_I love you, even though I shouldn't._

_Clary. _

I re-read it a few times then stared at the paper for a while, ignoring it when the words seemed to blur in to one big mess of letters. Everything that I'd been holding back since I'd left Idris came flooding back in to me and it hit me like a tonne of bricks square to the face. It was hard to breath, but at least I thought I got what she was talking about.

This blood bond was the reason I didn't feel right, the reason I felt so empty now, and the reason I'd felt so empty before we'd met. It was because she wasn't there, because she wasn't connected to me directly.

I slammed my fist angrily against the porcelain toilet bowl and I head a cough outside the door.

"Are you finished?" the guard asked and I rolled my eyes, hastily shoving the paper back in to my pocket and withdrawing the hidden seraph blade Jocelyn had handed me.

"No." I said, standing up and climbing on to the seat so I could just about reach the frosted window high up on the wall.

"What's taking so long?" his voice piped up.

"I haven't been able to use the bathroom properly for a week. What do _you_ think is taking so long?" I said sarcastically as I fiddled with the latch. It wouldn't budge so I carefully slipped the blade beneath the hinges and gave it a soft tug. It fell away almost immediately.

With a smile, I hoisted myself up and out of the window and on to the roof without much difficulty. It felt good to taste fresh air on my tongue and feel it blowing through my dirty hair so I stayed crouched there for a long moment, reveling in the feeling before I took a step forward in to my leap of faith.

As I fell towards the ground, I felt no panic. Jonathan had been right; it was like I was flying. Feeling slightly giddy, I let my arms extend like wings, feeling gravity protest against them as they created unnecessary drag. Before I knew it, I hit the floor with no more than a soft _thump_ and straightened up; looking up to the fourth story window I'd just fell from. I could hear someone slamming above me and I grinned, pushing my too long hair out of my face as I turned and made my way out of the institute, cloaking myself in a glamour as I did so.

* * *

"Take!" _crack_, "That!" _crack_, "Demon!" _crack_, "Scum!" _crack_.

The demon died with a high pitched squeal and it fell limp on the end of my blade where it had been impaled. I was surrounded by thick pools of congealed demon blood, my shirt and shoes spotted with holes from where their ichor had hit me. With a disgusted look on my face, I held my blade away from my body and kicked off the punctured skull, which was now all that was left of the latest demon I'd been taking out my frustration on. It clattered to the ground and I watched, satisfied, as it hissed and dissolved in to nothing.

I'd killed about fifteen in one go- there has been an infestation in a subway tunnel- but I still didn't feel any better. I was wound tighter than a coil; there was so much I had to do but no one would listen to me. I mean, Angel, they'd placed me under house arrest (and look where it got 'em, eh?) because they thought I was conspiring against the Clave! Seriously, the system was fucked. Well and truly screwed.

And while they sat in the Institute gossiping with each other, eating scones and drinking tea with their pinkies stuck out like uptight brats, Clary was out there fighting for all of their stupid lives against an enemy in the form of her own father!

It didn't make sense. Did they have no sense of self preservation at all?

_Bastards._

I kicked the ground as I head a slither behind me and let out a long sigh. More? Okay, fine. If they wanted to die so badly I was sure I could give them their wish. Just paint me blue and call me Genie.

_Or not._

I spun around on my heel and held my blade out ready, immediately taking on the way too familiar fighting stance. The Raum demon reared itself up to its full height, acidic green saliva dripping from three sets of very sharp, very deadly teeth. I looked at it, uninterested, before lunging forward and striking it across the chest with my blade. It screeched loudly and slithered to the right with an angry hiss before it dove for me.

The demon landed heavily on my chest, its jaws snapping furiously at my neck. With difficulty, I managed to grab a firm hold around it's middle (I couldn't really call what I was holding its waist) and pried it away from my body and tossed it against the wall, smirking when I heard the satisfying crack of its head against concrete.

I walked slowly towards it as it curled up pitifully on the ground, trying to slither as far away from me as possible. Just as I raised my blade ready to make the critical hit, it spoke.

"_Jonathan Herondale_," it hissed and I was momentarily taken aback. But only for a moment.

I lowered my blade to its skin, just where its heart should have been, and held it there with the tip digging in slightly.

"How do you know my name?" I asked curiously. It hissed out a laugh and I prodded it harder.

"_Valentine_." It replied.

"Ah," I rolled my eyes, "I should have known. The evil master mind himself. He still in Idris or has he realized I'm missing yet?"

"_The army is growing. The demons will destroy the Clave. The angels will die at the hands of demons_. _And she will help do it. The girl."_

I had to admit, that sparked some interest. And panic.

"Girl? What girl are you on about?"

"_Morgenstern. The girl_."

"Clary?" I asked, trying to keep the note of panic out of my voice.

"_Clarissa._"

As soon as her name had come out of its gaping mouth, I instinctively plunged the blade through its chest. I watched as it shriveled in to nothing, leaving only scorch marks behind on the ground as I struggled to find my breath.

But I knew she was okay. I would feel if she wasn't- she said I'd feel it in my blood if something was wrong and right now all I could feel was adrenaline and energy coursing through my veins.

Clary was okay.

For now.

* * *

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_The looking glass; so shiny and new. How quickly the glamour fades._


	12. Ready To Cry Uncle?

**A/N: We all know by now that I'm not Cassandra Clare and all affiliated characters and plot conventions belong to her. **

**This last week I've been busying myself with watching Vampire Knight on the internet since I exhausted my patience for every other TV program going and I decided some anime/manga would be a nice change. Long story short, I love it and would like some suggestions of what to watch next pleaseeee!**

**As always, thanks for the reviews for the last chapter. Hope this one is alright! **

* * *

**CPOV**

My sword arced through the air over my head with a hiss and clashed against Jonathan's. Metallic ringing sounded all around us as I parried his returning blow, shoving his sword to the side and spinning in to my next attack. The tip of my sword flew at his face, leaving a shallow cut from the corner of his right eye across his cheek. He paused for a second and brought a long finger to the cut so he could run it along the length of the wound. I watched, disgusted, as he put the finger to his mouth and licked away the blood with a smile. The look in his nearly black eyes was maniacal, like he was seriously enjoying the thought of hurting me. I wasn't stupid enough to think that he wouldn't cause serious damage just because I was his sister- that probably spurred him on even more.

With a possessed laugh he lunged for me and I dived out of the way of his blade, tumbling to the floor as it swiped just above my head. I saw a few strands of red hair sail through the air above me and huffed out a breath before swinging out my own sword and swiping for his legs. He jumped over the blade and landed in a crouch, glaring at me with his teeth bared and face now smeared in blood. I grinned a little and dived for him but he threw his sword forward and I had to drop to the side at the last second. I landed heavily, knocking all the wind out of my body and I screamed aloud when I heard a stomach churning crack from my elbow. I flopped back to the ground, abandoning my weapon so I could cradle my arm to my chest. I had to bite hard on my lip to stop myself from crying.

"Ready to cry uncle?" Jonathan said lazily as he stood above me, watching me from beneath his messy blonde hair. He held the tip of his sword to my throat and cocked his head to the side, an arrogant smile pulling up the corners of his mouth. I coughed and wiped my good arm across my forehead then forced a smile.

"Not even close." I said and I kicked my feet out in to his shins. He buckled backwards, surprised, and it was all the time I needed to grab my own sword and push my weight against him until he toppled to the floor. His sword flew out of his hand and I caught it before it hit the ground and quickly rounded on him. I crossed the blades and held them to his neck with a sneer.

"You're too arrogant when you fight." I said, looking him straight in the eye, "You got complacent when I was on the ground and didn't assess the options I had. You rely too much on the fact you're faster and stronger than everyone else and get lazy. You should really work on that; one day it might kill you."

Jonathan watched me with hard eyes, not even phased by the cross-blades trapping his throat.

"Complacent or not, it'll still take more than a few strips of sharp metal to kill me." he said, jutting out his chin so his neck was almost touching the edge of the blades.

"Maybe," I half shrugged, "but demon blood only made you stronger than everyone else. It didn't make you indestructible even if you might think you are, and I'm the one who knows the different ways to kill you."

Jonathan raised an eyebrow at me with a half smile.

"Is that a threat, Clarissa?"

"No," I sighed and pushed down on the hilts of the two blades so they sank in to the grass either side of his neck, trapping him on the ground. I straightened up and smiled, tapping his cheek with mock affection and smiled, "it's a warning. See you at dinner."

I turned and walked back towards the house, leaving Jonathan alone on the ground. I nodded to the guards at the door leading in to the manor from the training grounds and they mumbled _good afternoon's_ to me as I swept past, cradling my arm and biting the inside of my cheek because it hurt so much.

"Clarissa," my father's voice said as I walked through the foyer. I turned my head towards his study to see him standing in the doorway, Hodge hunched at his side looking pitiful. I forced a smile on to my face even though looking at my father made me feel violently sick and walked to him, kissing him lightly on the cheek.

"Hello father." I said cheerfully, inclining my head to Hodge as a way of greeting.

"I hope you've been keeping yourself busy." Valentine said, his voice surprisingly light. I nodded and gestured down to my training gear.

"Jonathan and I have been sparring. I'll need your help with healing my arm, Hodge." I added, looking at him. His clothes were hanging from his body and his face looked sunken. He really was old before his time.

"Oh? Where is your brother now? I've been meaning to have a word with him." Valentine asked. I glanced over my shoulder towards the training grounds with a grin.

"He's otherwise engaged at the moment," I said, thinking of how he was currently pinned to the floor. Valentine raised an eyebrow and I shrugged.

"Pretty sure you don't want to know. I'll go fix myself up for dinner. Hodge?"I gave Valentine one last smile before I turned and walked away, my face immediately dropping in to a glare. I didn't need to look at Hodge to know he was following me to the stairs. I entered my room and crossed straight to my wardrobe. I pulled it open and inspected my clothes with a frown. I hated how dinner here was a formal affair.

I'd just grabbed hold of a black swing dress when I heard the bedroom door close softly. I didn't glance over my shoulder, I knew who it was. Instead I knelt down and grabbed for some ballet flats, wincing as a sharp pain throbbed through my arm.

I tossed the clothes on my bed and grabbed my stele from the bedside table. Hodge was standing in the corner of my room, looking at the floor.

"Are you okay?" I asked quietly. He looked up, shocked, and nodded quickly. I rolled my eyes and held out my arm for him to inspect. I gasped and hissed as he turned it this way and that, looking at it with a careful eye.

"I don't think it's broken but I'll make a sling for you to wear for a few days while you heal. Here," he held out his hand for my stele and began tracing a series of different runes on my arm. With each new rune, the pain in my arm lessened and I was finally able to move it without flinching.

"Better?" he asked. I nodded, flexing it a bit.

"Thanks. Any new information?" I asked quietly. Hodge frowned and shook his head.

"Valentine is sticking to his plan. We have a day or two until it goes through. He believes you're going to draw the rune and all of his plans are set around that."

"A day or two?" I said weakly, grimacing. That didn't give me much time.

"Yes. Do you think you can manage it?"

"It doesn't matter- I _have_ to manage it. I just hope Jace has managed to convince the Clave to come. I can't understand why they wouldn't- they've been begging for a reason to destroy my father for years now. It would be stupid if they didn't grab the chance now."

"Are you sure you can go through with this? There's a good chance that you might-"

"I know." I said firmly, looking him in the eyes, "but if dying is what it takes to keep everyone else safe then it's a small price to pay."

* * *

Jonathan glared at me throughout dinner and made snippy comments whenever the subject of fighting came up. The cut on his cheek was still there but it had been cleaned up. I didn't understand why he hadn't used an _iratze _to get rid of the scar altogether but my brothers mind wasn't something I ever wanted to understand. I watched him as he spoke to our father and wondered what he'd be like if he wasn't infested with demon blood. I could have had a normal life and a normal family if Valentine hadn't been so obsessed with playing God.

I slammed my fork down on the table, cursing his name internally. The pair of them looked at me from the other end of the table and I regretted letting my emotions run wild instantly. My father raised a questioning eyebrow and my mind raced for an excuse.

"Sorry. I was just thinking about something."

"Yeah? What about?" Jonathan asked snidely. I met his gaze coolly but inside I was panicking. What if they suspected me of something?

"Him downstairs- Jace. Something he said to me." I said, my voice bored.

"What did he say?" Valentine asked me. He laced his fingers together and watched me with an interested look.

"He insulted me."I shrugged. Jonathan raised an eyebrow, looking so much like our father at that moment that it scared me.

"Want me to pay him a visit?" he asked, smirking dangerously.

"No," I said a little too quickly. I saw interest spark in both of their eyes so I backtracked a little.

"You know how much I hate it when you mess with my fun. This one is mine and I intend to see it through to the end." I frowned. Jonathan rolled his eyes and muttered something about not being allowed to have any fun.

"You have plenty of fun," I snapped, feeling defensive, "You got to 'question' that vampire on your own, remember?"

"Oh, yeah. Good times." He smirked and looked vacantly at the wall. I rolled my eyes and pushed some food around my plate with my fork.

We ate in silence for a while before Valentine set down his cutlery and looked right at me.

"Have you prepared the rune, Clarissa?"

"Yeah," I nodded and tried not to gag when I saw slow smiles spread across their faces. Jonathan looked like he was so happy he could burst in to song but Valentine…

He looked completely insane.

"Excellent. The time is set; at sundown tomorrow Jonathan will set the demons loose in Alicante while you and I enter the Hall of Accords and place the Destruction rune on the ground. I want an audience for my uprising- I would like both of you to be there tonight when I send them a message. I have it on good authority that most of the higher members are still at the New York Institute."

"Finally, some action!" Jonathan grinned and fist pumped the air. I tried to look pleased but all I managed to do was grimace.

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**JPOV**

There were four guards surrounding my door now- two on either side of it. It'd been like this ever since my grand return to the Institute the night before and the Inquisitor had almost had a hernia from shouting so much. I even had to be accompanied every time I had to use the toilet which was probably one of the least dignified things I've ever been through, and I've done some pretty undignified stuff in the past. I found out not long after I'd entered the bathroom that there was also a guy stood on the roof outside the window making sure I couldn't hit the road through it again. I was pretty sure I'd seen him having a quick look at me through the window while I'd been peeing so I'd flipped him the bird after slinging a few choice words his way.

All I have to say is thank the Angel my shower has frosted glass.

I was sat on my bed having a staring contest with some middle aged guy with a messed up beard and a bad comb-over when I suddenly felt like I'd been hit by a truck going a hundred miles per hour. My chest hurt so much that tears came to my eyes but I somehow felt more whole than I had done since I left the manor. I tried to gulp in air but all I managed to do was gasp like a fish out of water. My head dropped between my legs as I clawed at my temples, yelling words that made no sense. I could hear people yelling and someone was pulling at my shirt but the pain was too much- I couldn't keep my eyes focused.

But then something settled in to place and the pain was gone. All that was left was a trail of tears down my cheeks and my ragged breathing.

"What the Angel was that?" one of my guards shouted, his face bright red. I shifted my gaze over each of them and noticed they were all staring at one thing- my hands. I looked down and swallowed a yell as I brought them up to my face, twisting them this way and that to get a better look. They were scolding hot and glowing bright white. I had to squint after a second because the glare was too much but it died down quickly and before I knew it, the glare was gone. But there was something else on my hands…

I had two new runes, one on the back of each of my hands. The inky black lines made up the shape of a pair of what could have been wings with thin rays cutting through them and ending at my knuckles. I looked at them curiously and it was like I instantly understood.

"The shift." I muttered. My guards watched me cautiously and my eyes widened. I could feel something warm in my chest and somehow I knew-

"She's here. Clary is here!" I yelled and dove off the bed and ran for the door. The guards grabbed my shoulders but I tore away and slammed the door open.

"What the-?" one of them said when we saw what was happening outside the room. People were running at top speed towards the library, yelling orders and shouting for weapons. My guards abandoned me straight away and took off with the rest of them, leaving me stood alone in the doorway. Without a second thought I ran with them and pushed my way in to the library.

In the middle of the floor, surrounded by members of the Clave with their weapons drawn, was Jonathan and-

"Clary!" Isabelle screamed, pushing her way through the barrier of people. I watched from a distance wishing I could do the same but I knew that if they saw me the entire plan would be blown. I couldn't help but notice that Clary's arm was bandaged and held up by a sling. Clary turned towards Izzy and cocked an eyebrow.

"Who are you?" she asked with a sneer in her voice. Izzy's face fell immediately.

"It's me… Isabelle Lightwood." She said quietly. She turned around quickly and her eyes met mine. I shook my head and put my finger to my lips. I knew exactly how she must be feeling since I'd been through the same a few days earlier.

"Lightwood? Ah, yeah I know you guys. The blood traitors. I've had fun playing with your adoptive brother. He's been telling us some really interesting information." Clary said with a breezy smile and I winced. Isabelle's face was hard and she stepped away. Alec met my glance.

"Show us Jace." He said firmly. Clary looked at him for a long moment.

"That's not how it works." Jonathan piped up, squaring his shoulders. He put a hand to the hilt of his sword but before he'd even drew it, Seraph blades flew towards him. One sailed right through where his heart should have been and he laughed.

"You really think we'd come here in person? We're projections-"

"Enough. I think it's time we got down to business." A cold voice said from nowhere in the room but suddenly another man was stood there between Clary and Jonathan. He smiled eerily and laced his fingers together in front of him, looking pleasantly around the room as though he was surrounded by friends.

"For those of you who don't know me, my name is Valentine and these are my children, Jonathan and Clarissa. Tomorrow at sundown an army of demons will descend on Alicante. They will destroy all of those who are loyal to the Clave- every single blood traitor amongst our kind. On top of this my daughter has a special talent. She can create any rune imaginable and that is precisely what she has done for tomorrow's events. The Destruction rune will destroy every Downworlder on the face of the earth. They are the filth of our planet- a worthless infestation. Signing the Accords has given them power they do not deserve so I intend to undo your wrongs and cleanse the world and the Shadowhunter's all at once.

"You have no hope of defeating us; our numbers are far superior. We have infinite access to demons. I suggest you simply surrender now and accept the new reign to spare us bloodshed. The blood of the Shadowhunter's is precious- I understand our numbers have dwindled over the last few decades so I am loathe to waist the precious blood we all hold. It would be a shame for you to burn with the scum. If any resistance remains, we will crush you. Alicante will burn. If you wish to join me, be at the Hall of Accords to witness the new reign begin. Choose wisely; until tomorrow."

And with that, the three of them were gone and nothing was left but the sound of Jonathan's manic laughter and a dense, apprehensive silence. No one could believe what had happened but slowly, one by one, Clave members turned to look at me solemnly. I stood still but pulled myself up to my full height, eyeing everyone I could.

"I suggest," I said lightly, breaking the silence with a smug smile, "that you all stop gawking at me, realize how idiotic you are and start organizing portals and battle strategies for the Shadowhunter's while I round up all the Downworlder's possible so we might actually stand a chance in this fight." I finished before turning on my heel and stalking out of the library. I yanked my cell from my pocket and bashed in a few numbers.

"Ah, Princess, you're still alive. Wonderful. To what do I owe the-?" he answered on the second ring, sounding completely confused.

"Magnus. We need your help."

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**There we go. Not as long as usual but… what the hey! The next chapter will be the start of the battle! We're getting near the end now guys and I'll be speeding up the updates too in the next week so I'm not leaving you hanging. **

**Please review and let me know what you think, it only takes a second. Thank you!:D**

**ML**

_Oh what tangled webs we weave when you practice to deceive._


	13. Internal Espionage

**A/N: I own nothing but the plot. Ho-hum.**

**Feel free to pelt me with imaginary cabbages and rotten tomatoes for the epic fail on the update front. Life caught up to me (I call this period of my life Failgate for some interesting and frankly hilarious reasons) and I'll be the first to admit I took a preference to my other story over this one. **

**Once again, thanks for all the great reviews and praise- I can't explain how much it means that you lot actually enjoy my writing. **

**Without any further ado- here is the next chapter.**

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**CPOV**

The sunrise was way too beautiful for the day. It should have been raining; lashing down hard balls of hail as thunder clapped and lightning forked across the sky like vicious tongues from a serpent's mouth. Instead, I was bathed in rose colored sunlight and everything was in soft focus. It didn't suit the bloodbath that was fast approaching at all but then again, there's a certain chaotic beauty in a storm, too. Maybe the calm was far more ominous than I had first thought—the irony it proposed was more dangerous than anything a storm could throw at me. You could tremble in fear of a tempest, but what does anyone feel in the sunlight but complacency?

Now I looked properly, I saw that the soft morning glow of the sun had turned the grass crimson- like freshly spilled blood. I felt a shiver pass over my skin and the hairs on the back of my neck and arms stood erect.

I hadn't slept at all the night before- I was still reeling from the blinding pain of the shift I'd felt as I appeared beside my brother at the Institute and the ominous sense of pending doom for this evenings activities. I opted to spend my time with my Jace clone instead, since I couldn't spend what might possibly be the very last hours of my life with the real thing. He was a far cry from the real one, but at least it was semi-pleasant company, even if he sucked at humor and couldn't understand sarcasm to save his life. He'd let me sit beside him for hours and had even played with my hair as I blathered on in a nervous, endless rant about next to nothing important. It was how I imagined a relationship should have been like- understanding and comfortable instead of founded on lies and a shared hatred of the man I called my father.

The sun was high in the sky before anyone disturbed me. I was pulled out of my thoughts by a curiously soft hand on my shoulder and I whipped around immediately.

"Hi," Jonathan said quietly, not looking at me but out across the rolling hills ahead of us. The look he wore was peculiar- something I hadn't seen on his face for a long, long time.

He looked _content_.

There wasn't a single trace of malice or hatred or insanity visible. His lips curled up in to something that was akin to a true smile instead of a sneer or smirk.

"Hello." I replied carefully and turned back to the horizon. He removed his hand from my shoulder and leaned on the bars of my balcony, letting out a heavy sigh.

"It's beautiful isn't it?" he said quietly, nodding his head towards the picturesque countryside before us.

"Yeah. It reminds me of the things mom use to paint." I sighed. I half expected him to stiffen at the mention of Jocelyn but he merely smiled more and nodded his head.

"Reminds me of home."

"It _is_ home." I pointed out. He sniffed out a laugh and shot me a look out of the corner of his eyes.

"I mean how it used to be. Before all of this," he gestured around us with a lazy sweep of his hand, "when mom was still here and we were actually happy. I haven't felt happy in a long time."

My heart tugged painfully in my chest and I suddenly felt choked up. This was the brother I'd known before- this gentle and understanding person that stood beside me now.

"What happened to us?" I said, half to myself.

"People change." He replied simply. I thought back to the first time Valentine had taken Jonathan away just over two years ago with a frown, knowing he meant how he changed when the demon's blood finally took effect. I thought about the boy he'd left as- so much like Max- and then the man he'd returned; closed off and inhumane towards his own family.

A poor excuse for a human being.

"That blood might be in you but it doesn't make you a monster." I told him quietly. He looked at me for a moment and barked out a laugh, a shadow passing across his face.

"The blood doesn't make me a monster. _I_ make me a monster. That's just who I am and it's not going to change."

"Jonathan-"

"Clarissa… Clary. You don't know what it feels like when adrenalin sinks in and I'm in the zone- no one can stop me. I'm actually counting down the seconds until I can finally get in to this battle and tear people apart with my bare hands. The smell of blood… it's more appetizing to me than a steak."

I cringed at his confession, at how he could say it with that serene, happy look on his face.

"Don't you miss how we used to be?"

"Sure I do. I miss how I could actually stand looking at you and how I wasn't suspicious of every single thing you did. I miss being your brother and not wanting to tear you apart because you're my polar opposite. I miss all of that but the thing I miss most is how I could remember what it felt like to actually love someone enough to want to protect them. I haven't felt love in two years for anything other than killing and now I can't even begin to imagine what love must be like. Fuck, I'd give anything to feel for even just a minute- even if it was pain." He said heavily. I blinked back tears furiously, unwilling to let Jonathan see me cry.

"To love is to destroy," he concluded and I nodded my head sharply, the mantra slamming me back down to earth with a painful slam.

If I was honest with myself, which I rarely was, I still loved my brother but it was how someone would love a relative after they'd died. You treasured the memory of how they'd been but knew you'd never see them again to witness them grow and change. I cherished the memory of my brother and I realized then that I'd been in mourning for him for a long time now. My Jonathan had died two years ago and I was still reeling from the loss but the man that stood beside me now, however much he looked like my beautifully chaotic brother, was a stranger.

And I felt no remorse for the fact that I was going to attempt to murder him tonight.

"I'm sorry that you feel that way." I said quietly.

"Me too, sometimes." He replied, looking me in the eyes. There was so much left unsaid in that conversation but the look we exchanged said it all. We came to a silent understanding- we were both on our own tonight. He wouldn't protect me and I certainly had no intention of protecting him. As far as he knew, all I cared about was making sure our father's plan succeeded and killing off a few Downworlder's in the process. I let him think it because there was no chance in hell I would mess up my plan now. I was far too close to my goal to give myself away. There was too much at stake in any case.

We stood in silence for a few minutes, both staring out at the scenery as our childhood passed before my eyes. I was truly sorry it had come to this but I was as resigned to the fact as he was that Jonathan Christopher Morgenstern no longer existed.

A weight rested on my chest as I thought to my future. I could be dead in a matter of hours but there was always a chance I'd survive. If I did I was sure my future was with Jace and the Lightwoods.

"When do we leave?" I asked.

"Midday. It'll take a few hours to get to Alicante and then I'll need to call on the demons. It's a pain in the ass cutting myself all the time to release the blood-"

"_You_ control the demons?" I asked, momentarily dumbfounded. Jonathan arched an eyebrow at me, giving me a look of contempt.

"Well it's not as if father would ask the Angel Girl to control them, now, is it? You don't have the right 'tools'." He quirked an eyebrow with a snide grin. I knew what he meant; I had the wrong kind of blood.

"I thought he would be controlling them." I shrugged, trying to pretend I wasn't shocked. It was going to take a hell of a lot more effort in killing Jonathan now. I'd been hoping to kill Valentine first in order to get rid of the demons- they always retreated pretty quickly once their masters were out of the way- and spare as many lives as possible, but now I'd have to rethink my strategy…

"You think like the Clave Clarissa- always inside the box. Why would father control them when he's just a stupid little mortal and I can do it just as well and not die in the process?"

"I'm sure he'd appreciate your high praise of his abilities." I said darkly. Jonathan grinned at me and cuffed my chin playfully.

"What daddy doesn't know will never hurt him."

"Whatever. How are you planning on getting the demons in to the Glass City anyway? They can't get in for the wards. It's not like we can walk up to the North Gate, ring the doorbell and ask politely if we can massacre them." I said sarcastically, fishing for details that father hadn't bothered to tell me. All I knew was that by nightfall I'd somehow be in the Hall of Accords.

Jonathan raised his arm in front of his face, taking in the lightly tanned skin before he took out a small knife and cut a long, thin line from the crook of his elbow to his wrist. Dark crimson blood leaked from the wound and blossomed over his skin. He let it drop to the floor without a care. Where the blood hit the flagstones, it hissed and corroded the surface away.

"One drop of demon blood on the Glass Wards and those baby's are history. Then we'll be in business and I can finally get my hands dirty while you go draw pictures on the Accords Hall floor." He grinned and traced his finger up the wound. It closed over immediately with a slight hiss and nothing was left but a scar and a line of blood.

"And you're going to get in to the city to do that, how…?"

"If I didn't know any better I'd think you were trying to get details for the Clave." Jonathan snapped, all traces of his earlier self eliminated. My heart thudded painfully and I was pretty sure he'd be able to hear it.

"You think I'd turn traitor against my own family?" I said, trying to keep my voice level, "Unlike you, I still feel emotion and I still love this family. I would do anything for my father and even though I'd like to stamp on your face with steel capped boots sometimes, for some reason I still care about you."

Lies. All lies.

Jonathan smirked and ruffled my hair in a way that made me want to rip his hand off.

"You should go get ready. We leave in an hour and Angel Boy needs to at least be able to sit on a horse."

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**JPOV**

There were at least three hundred Downworlder's milling around Alicante and it was only two in the afternoon. By six this evening, we were estimated to be hosting an army of over two thousand Downworlder's as well as every overage Shadowhunter going.

And me. Obviously.

I stood watching them as they stepped out of the numerous portals in and around the city with a slight smile- the way things were going, it looked like we might stand some kind of chance against Valentine after all. Of course, the vampires wouldn't be able to come until after nightfall- if they were planning on coming at all- but I could hope like hell that they'd turn up late rather than never.

Guards directed groups to their different posts, handing out weapons where they were needed. Everyone looked solemn but there were identical looks in every single being's eyes as they settled down to wait that united friends and enemies alike.

It was defiance and a deep, desperate need to continue living.

No one here tonight would go down without a pretty damn hard fight, I was sure.

"You are officially my bitch." Magnus said in my ear, his voice like crushed velvet. I blinked slowly and shot him a look that clearly stated the words 'What the fuck?' He laughed again and gestured around him.

"Those were our terms. I get the Downworlder's to come; you get to be my bitch, now be gone and fetch me a sandwich." He grinned like a cat, his pupils dilating in to feline-like slits. I rolled my eyes.

"I don't remember agreeing to these terms."

"I specifically said-"

"Can't you go bother Alec or someone else? Anyone other than me will do, really." I snapped. I was starting to feel the onset of panic for Clary's safety. What if one of our fighters mistook her for the enemy? What if her plan didn't work and Valentine or Jonathan had killed her?

_No they wouldn't_, I reasoned with myself, _they need her to draw the rune._

"Alec is busy."

"Doing what, exactly? Baking a cake? God help us all if he's taken up cooking. I don't imagine he's any better than Izzy." I said, looking at the sky. Magnus snickered by my side and I raised an eyebrow.

"He's at the Hall of Accords with the other Nephilim so it's just me and you Princess."

"What's he doing there?" I frowned.

"He's of age. He's being briefed with the rest of the oldies." Magnus said as if I was the most docile person on the planet. I shook my head.

"I should be up there with them! It's because of me that they even know what the hell is going on." I growled. Magnus rolled his eyes very slowly.

"My heart is bleeding for you."

"You know what? I'm not going to sit around here waiting to die." I said stubbornly.

"Oh good. So you _will_ get me a sandwich? Do you people believe in Subway? If so then I want a twelve inch sub of the day, toasted with cheese and every piece of salad you can get. Oh, except no olives. I can't stand those slimy little suckers." Magnus reeled off. I looked at him blankly.

"You want a soda with that?" I offered sarcastically before I turned on my heel and stalked away from the Square.

"And a cookie!" Magnus yelled after me, his voice laced with laughter. I shook my head and chewed on the inside of my cheek to stop from calling him some pretty abusive names and telling him where exactly he could shove his cookie. A group of grouchy looking teen's eyed me as I walked past them and I gave them just as much back. One of them- a girl with smooth dark skin and tight braids- separated from their group and fell in to step by my side.

"What do you want?" I grunted, shooting her a glare. The corner of her mouth curled in to a smile.

"You're him, aren't you?" she said simply.

"If by him you mean the most stunningly attractive being to ever grace this earth, then yes, that would be me, but otherwise I have no idea what you're talking about." I quipped back. She didn't seem thrown by my comment. She just smiled harder.

"You're the one they're all talking about. The Angel Boy."

I stopped in my tracks and turned to glare at her.

"Who are you?" I said, eyes narrow.

"Maia. I'm part of Luke's pack."

"Luke…?" I said, struggling to place the name.

"He's seeing your girlfriend's mom. Jocelyn."

"How do you know about Clary?" I snapped. She held her hands up and raised an eyebrow.

"Our entire world knows about her now, if they didn't know beforehand. The Killer Angel, they call her. A lot of them wouldn't mind tearing her apart, you know. She tore apart a lot of families herself." Maia said pointedly. Anger flared in me and I grabbed hold of her by the front of her shirt, whipping out my seraph blade in the process. I shouted _Cassiel_ at the sky and held the sharp blade to her neck. She didn't flinch but her friends raced to her, half phased in to their wolf states.

"You tell them if they lay a finger on Clary, there won't be enough of them left when I'm finished to identify the body." I hissed.

"Jonathan," a smooth voice said behind me. I flicked my glance over my shoulder momentarily to see a familiar guy- Luke, in fact- striding towards me with Jocelyn by his side.

"Don't call me that." I spat and Luke bowed his head apologetically.

"Jace, please let go of Maia." He said. I found myself dropping the girl immediately and she stumbled backwards, baring her teeth as she readjusted her outfit. Her friends barked out insults at me and I distinctly heard a couple insults come my way from the crowd of Downworlder's that had gathered to watch the scene.

"Do you know what they're saying about her?" I asked the pair of them, my voice bordering on a shout. I couldn't look Jocelyn in the eye because she looked so much like Clary that it hurt my chest, "They're calling her a murderer. They're talking about _killing_ her!"

"So I've heard," Jocelyn said quietly, eyeing the wolves warily. She looked tired- like she hadn't slept properly in weeks. Dark circles made her glowing green eyes appear sunken and sallow but there was a spark in them that blazed contempt and determination.

"Clarissa is a talented, well practiced Shadowhunter. She won't be in danger." Luke explained to me calmly but his stoic attitude towards the subject had my skin crawling.

"I don't care how good she is. If anything happens to her and I find out it was one of these creatures-" I gestured towards the crowd of Downworlder's with a violent flick of my wrist, "I won't be held responsible for my actions." I turned and eyed the crowd, "You hear that? Lay one finger on Clarissa Morgenstern and I'll personally remove your limbs, the Accords be dammed!" I finished with a snarl. Sinking my hand in to the pocket of my jeans, I pulled out _Gavreel_- the seraph blade Jocelyn had given me back at the institute- and pushed it in to her palm. She grabbed it tightly, cradling it to her chest.

"You'll need that for tonight." I said softly and she nodded with a grimacing smile.

"I… Jocelyn, I promise I won't let anything happen to your daughter. If she died tonight…"

"You're a good boy, Jace, but that's all you are. It isn't your duty to protect my daughter." She grimaced.

"But it is," I said, shaking my head. Jocelyn gave me a puzzled, tired look and I sucked in a breath.

"Look," I said nervously, running my hand through my hair and chewing on my bottom lip, "I'm in love with Clary. If she died I don't know what I'd do. I've already lost my parents and Valentine saw to it that Michael Wayland was killed too and he was the closest thing I had to a father. If Clary was gone, I'd have nothing."

"Michael… you're the little boy he brought up?" she asked, her eyes wide and understanding. I jerked my head up and down.

"Then you're… you're the third experiment. You have angel blood." She said sadly.

"So I've been told," I said dryly. She smiled weakly and placed her hands on my shoulders.

"I'm sorry. For everything that has happened to you."

"It wasn't your fault." I said awkwardly and stepped away. She nodded absently, faintly, and slid her hand in to Luke's.

"Good luck, Jace."

"And to you both. Maybe we can introduce ourselves properly when this is over." I said thoughtfully, with a hint of a smile. Jocelyn's mouth twitched and she nodded as I set off through the street, towards the Penhallow's house where we were staying.

It didn't take long to get there and before I knew it, I was hammering my fist on the door, tapping my foot impatiently as I heard someone scrambling for the lock. There was a low curse on the other side of the door as the lock clicked the door swung open.

"Hey Sebastian," I said distractedly and breezed past the stocky dark haired boy in to the living room. He followed me silently and threw himself on to one of the reclining chairs, frowning hard.

"Can I borrow your stele?" he asked in his heavily accented voice. He'd spent most of his life living in France but he was living in Idris with the Penhallow's now.

"Sure." I tossed it to him and watched as he drew an iratze on a long thin cut on his forearm.

"What happened?" I asked. He scowled as he watched the wound close up before he threw the stele back. It landed neatly on my thighs.

"Caught it on the lock when I was trying to let you in. That's the third time this week it's happened and it's only Tuesday."

"Bad times, man." I hummed sympathetically. He nodded and propped his feet up on the table.

"Where is everyone?" I asked. Sebastian shrugged and pointed to the stairs.

"Isabelle and Aline are in their room playing with each other's hair or somethingnand Max is in the kitchen reading his comic. The rest of them are all at the Hall of Accords."

"Man, its bull that Alec gets to go and we don't." I complained. Sebastian only shrugged.

"I'm good here. I'm not quite ready to die."

We sat in silence for a while until I got restless thinking about how fast the evening was approaching and wandered in to the kitchen. Max was sat on top of a kitchen unit, his glasses on and comic book out. His tongue poked out of the corner of his mouth as he concentrated and every so often he would laugh heartily. I couldn't help but smile at him. At least he would be safe from the action; Isabelle had told him she was going to chain him to his bed so he couldn't get mixed up in the fighting and get himself killed. Of course, there was every chance that one or more of us would die tonight. I thought about myself as a kid, and hoped to hell that Max wouldn't lose his family. I didn't want him to go through what I'd had to put up with. I'd never really known who I was and I couldn't imagine what it would be like for Max to lose his parents now.

"You okay kiddo?" I said after a while. Max looked up from his comic and his face broke out in to a huge grin. He leapt off the unit and half ran, half tripped over to me- the tail of his shirt hanging loose from his pants and flying freely behind him. He wrapped his arms around my waist and hugged me tightly. I smiled and returned the hug, ruffling his hair fondly.

"I'm okay. Where's Clary, Jace? I kind of miss her."

"Me too, kid. We'll see her soon though."

Max smiled again and pushed me on to a kitchen chair with his freakish nine year old strength. He dumped himself on my knee and handed me his comic.

"Read it too me," he demanded, "with the voices. Like you did at the institute."

"Max, honey, go to your room please." Maryse said from the doorway. Robert and Alec were stood behind her, as well as the Penhallow's. They all wore identical looks of exhaustion and apprehension.

I knew straight away that something was wrong.

"But mom-" Max moaned and she shook her head, ushering him through the living room and towards the stairs. Alec sat on the chair beside mine and clapped my shoulder with one hand. I shot him a questioning look but he remained stoic.

"What's going on?" I asked when Maryse came back in to the room. She grimaced and they all looked to Robert.

"We've been given our orders from the Clave." He said eventually. He was evading the question at the heart of the matter.

"Dad," I pressed, saying the word without even thinking. I'd never called him dad before. He blinked twice and then ran his hand through his thinning hair.

"I don't know how to tell you this Jace but the Clave… well, they've ordered that if anyone see's Clary tonight, they have to kill her on sight."

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**Once again, I'm sorry for the fail on updating. My last exam is this Tuesday so hopefully updates of the last few chapters will be more frequent! **

**Please REVIEW!:D**

_I hope we make it through. I hope the sea is just as blue as our dreams; we've got a long way to climb 'till we see what we've left behind. _


	14. The Sins of the Father

**A/N: Don't own it.**

**Hi there! So those of you who follow my other story know that I've been in hospital recently and that is one of the reasons I've been MIA. Those of you who don't follow it, well… now you know **** I'm not going to get in to the why's and how's and all that junk here, just know that this chapter took a lot of pushing and hard work to come out. Kind of like a baby. But far less messy. Maybe just as painful. Eh, I wouldn't know having never popped a sproglet before.**

**Whatever. I'm rambling.**

**Yeah; this chapter is extra, extra long in compensation (even though I didn't plan on that) and just a quick note- the JMPOV at the very beginning is Jonathan Morgenstern, just in case you don't realize. I felt like getting in to his screwed up head considering I'm currently in the mind frame myself. **

**Except I'm not a homicidal maniac…**

**Eh.**

**Finally- I'd like to say that if the person who sent me that **_**lovely**_** anonymous message is still reading this, I wonder if next time you flame me you can have the decency not to hide behind your anonymity please.**

**That being said, I hope I do the rest of you guy's justice. **

**Merry reading **

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JMPOV**

Everywhere I looked I saw blood. It was dripping thickly from the leaves in the trees, turning almost black as it mixed with the bark. I observed a moth as it fluttered past my face; its wings were stained red and beads of blood rolled down its antennae like crimson teardrops. I looked over my shoulder to where my sister sat rigidly on her horse with the angel freak slumped against her shoulder. There was blood dripping down his face and from his eyes, creating a slow river of the stuff that dropped languidly from his chin on to the white shirt he wore. I focused on the liquid ebbing through the fibers of the material and smiled slowly, my muscles working hard against the burning ache that took over my entire body when I felt like this- when I felt uncontrollable and _thirsty_. I knew that only the blood on the angel's face really existed; that the rest was being shown to me by my own mind. It was a symptom created by the demon blood rushing within my own veins, showing me what I craved- what I burned and longed for day in and day out.

I felt light headed with anticipation; sick to my stomach with greedy nerves.

It was the best feeling I'd ever had in my life. The rush was incomparable.

"Jonathan," Clarissa said softly, knowing there was no need to raise her voice because my raptor hearing could pick up the slightest whisper for miles around. I jerked my chin in her direction but continued scanning the manifested bloodbath around me, paying her minimal attention.

"It's time for you to leave." I heard her say as I watched a nearby oak leaking crimson blood instead of sap. I wanted to run my finger through the liquid and feel the viscous texture on my skin. Without even thinking about it, I nudge my horse with my foot and steered him towards the tree. I was vaguely aware of my guards following closely on foot behind me. They were always there with me when I left the confines of the house; always watching me with hawks eyes, making sure I didn't step over my father's finely drawn lines.

Treating me like a child.

I stopped the horse and jumped from him, patting the jet black beast before turning and striding towards the guards, forgetting the blood-sap in a sudden, painful rush of anger. I eyed them dubiously for a moment before looking towards the horizon and addressing my father.

"You're sending Blackwell and Pangborn with me?" I asked placidly. I heard my father chuckle and the soft thump of his feet as he landed on the ground.

"Naturally," he said; his voice was close to my ear. I turned a little so I could look at him, letting him see the distaste my eyes harbored.

"I don't see the point." I said bluntly. Again he laughed, and the sound set my skin on serrated razor's edges. As my anger flared, the world around me pulsed in a bloody mess even more gruesome and appetizing than before. My mouth watered and my eyes flicked quickly to Jace. He was still bleeding. He could sedate my hunger for a while, or at least long enough to keep my temper in check until I could find proper sustenance.

"Jonathan, are you listening to me?" my father cut through my train of thought and I forced my eyes back to his face. As soon as my focus was away from the smooth red liquid running down the angel boy's face, I found that I could think properly again. Tints of normal colour ebbed in to my vision; I could see the green in the grass and the soft colour of the blue sky, stricken by the early signs of sundown.

"No," I answered honestly and I raised my eyebrows, challenging him.

He said nothing, but waved Clarissa over to me. She had a stele in her hand- one that I'd never seen before- and Hodge scurried along behind her like the rat he was, as usual.

"Where'd you get that?" I nodded my head towards the instrument and she looked at it blandly for a moment before shrugging.

"Mom gave it to me before she left."

"And you're only just using it now?" I asked doubtfully. She rolled her eyes and frowned.

"She told me to save it for a special occasion. Taking over the Clave warrants a special occasion in my book." She explained, but there was a waver in her voice. It was slight, but enough to make me suspicious. I didn't question her though, just held out my arm so she could mark me.

"Do you want a portal to get to the city?" she asked. I shook my head and watched the runes she drew carefully, checking I understood the meaning of each.

"I can get there without your help." I said simply as she began to trace a new rune on my forearm. I'd never seen it before and even as she began it, it made my skin tingle uncomfortably.

"What are you drawing?" I asked, pulling my arm away and inspecting the rune carefully. It was a mass of swirls and angles centred carefully on a half drawn eye. Hodge spluttered out a cough, his eyes wide. I arched an eyebrow at him, my mouth set in a deep frown, and he mumbled his apologies and something about feeling 'under the weather'. I waved him off, annoyed, and turned back to my sister. She grabbed my arm back in to her grip without looking at me and pressed her stele harder than necessary to my skin so she could continue the rune.

"It's new. It'll help." She snapped. I ducked my head to the side, watching her carefully.

"Help how?"

"Just trust me, okay? It'll help us. It'll active once we're both in the city. I know it might feel strange now but when we meet in the city, you'll understand." She said as she finished. She yanked up her sleeve and showed me a similar mark on her own skin, though the eye wasn't filled in black like mine was.

"See? I have a similar one."

"They're different," I pointed out.

"Well done Einstein. The word 'similar' implies that there are differences." She said sarcastically and shoved her stele back in to the loop at her hip.

"Why are they different?" I asked and she shuffled uncomfortably, hesitating in her answer.

"Because you're part demon and I'm part angel. There had to be differences." She said, and I understood her awkwardness. I felt my face relax and I stepped towards her. She flinched and I laughed hollowly, pulling her in to a one armed hug.

"Thank you," I mumbled- the words felt like acid on my tongue. The only gratitude I was comfortable with was for myself. Clarissa went rigid before pulling away from me and turning her back.

"It's no problem. I'll do _anything_ as long as it helps." She said quietly, "You should go. You don't have long until sundown. The battle will start as soon as you've summoned the demons."

"Yeah." I whispered, feeling that flare in my stomach again that turned the entire world red. Without another word, I climbed back up on to my horse and took off towards the city, Pangborn and Blackwell hot on my heels.

We rode for nearly half an hour before I pulled on the reigns of my horse and came to an abrupt halt, a sudden thought tugging at my mind. I'd been fighting insanity ever since we'd left Clarissa, father, and the abundance of guards and Circle members behind us; trying to swallow back my hunger. But it was useless and I was almost blind from it now. I couldn't go any further without sustenance.

I dropped down from the horse and staggered because of the effort I was putting in to keeping my eyes open and my emotions in check.

"Master?" Pangborn said behind me, addressing me like he was nothing but one of my demon slaves. I turned slowly, brushing my hair out of my sticky face. I caught wind of his unsure, fearful emotions and took in a long drag of air, feeding off of the negative energy that pulsed from him. It was a bittersweet reward, but it helped none the less. I forced my mouth in to a smile and watched him fight a grimace at the sight of it.

"There are perks to being what I am, y'know." I said thoughtfully to no one in particular, "I mean I'm faster and stronger than everyone else; my hearing and eyesight are better than any creatures. I can _taste_ people's emotions in the air. It's all helpful in a fight, wouldn't you agree?" I addressed my guards with the last part and they nodded eagerly. I felt a shadow creep in to my being- it tugged at the loose seams of my soul and I closed my self off, feeling the smile on my face growing.

I took another step towards them. Their resolve faltered. I took another deep pull of the tainted air and tipped my head back so I was watching the sky.

"There is a downside, however. My... _situation_ requires a lot of energy to keep me functioning. It's a pain, and it hurts when the hunger get's past a certain point. I get angry." I said, watching them as though I was a predator taunting their prey. Blackwell's pulse thrummed quickly and I could hear the wetness of his blood rushing through his veins.

My mouth watered.

"Gentlemen, I've got to say... right now I'm pretty damn angry."

I heard their intake of breath and heavy footsteps as they retreated to their horses. I rolled my eyes and sauntered lazily in their direction, flicking my hand and making them stop in their tracks. The pair froze just before they reached the animals, poised mid-stride. I circled them predatorily, my head cocked to one side. Blackwell blinked furiously as Pangborn's eyes flitted around him, looking for an escape even though he was immobile. I paused in front of him with a grin.

"The pair of you are terrified. I can taste it. You think I'm going to kill you, don't you?" I paused, knowing they couldn't answer but mocking them for the fun of it, "I guess you're right. I am. I'm going to bleed you dry so I can carry on. Don't worry; it's a noble end to meet. You're sacrificing yourselves for the _greater good_." I laughed dryly as I drew a seraph blade from one of the sheaths at my waist.

"_Xaphan_," I muttered and the blade glowed with life. The serrated blade shot from the end of the hilt and reached just an inch away from Pangborn's chest. His eyes followed the blade as I traced idle circles in the air with the tip. A tear fell down his cheek.

I stopped mid-circle and frowned. I reached out with my empty hand and caught the tear with the tip of a finger and put it to my mouth. My tongue caught the salty liquid and in it I could taste the full extent of Pangborn's fear and it tipped me over the edge of hunger in to blind starvation. With a groan, I slashed the seraph blade across his neck and watched as blood spat at me like it was coming from a pressure pipe. I felt the wetness on my face and licked my lips. My eyes nearly rolled back in to my head, it tasted that good.

Blackwell's heart was almost beating out of his chest when I eventually turned to him, covered in his comrade's blood. I smiled fully at him, bearing my teeth. His eyes widened then closed again, screwing shut as if it would make my hunger fade and the madness stop.

I'd lived with it for years now. I was born with the devil inside me, acting as my sponsor. _There was no stopping it_. It was the sin of my father; he'd made me this way. I was a living enactment of his own past sins, regurgitated in to life ten times the menace he had ever been.

I wondered briefly if he was proud of the monster he'd created as I licked my lips, but the moment passed quickly and I was left with nothing but that unbelievable hunger.

"Hail and farewell, friend." I said in a gleeful voice before I launched myself at Blackwell, slashing out for a second time. He was gone in one swift movement that contained every part of my fury, malice and sadness for my existence- for my infliction upon people.

By the time I'd mounted my horse again, my hunger briefly sedated, the sun was almost halfway beneath the horizon. I kicked hard and the horse sped off towards the city, closing the gap quicker than any other horse could. The journey took less than fifteen minutes and before I even registered what was happening, I was jumping down from my horse and wrapping my hand around the hilt of my blade. There were lines of Shadowhunter's and Downworlder's outside the North Gate; all armed and prepared for battle. I smiled briefly before I ran towards them, arranging my face in to what I hoped to be a look of frenzy and wild concern.

The troop's stiffened and held their weapons as I approached, but no one took action. They were confused. I was alone and covered in blood- they didn't know who I was.

I could taste the question on the tips of their tongues;

_Is he an enemy or an ally?_

I almost collided with some of them when I slipped on the damp grass, but they held me still at arm's length. I forced my breathing to be heavy and mimicked their emotions, holding on to my chest as though it was injured.

"Who are you?" a tall man with jet black hair asked me. He held himself like a warrior; proud and certain, but I could feel his true fears. They echoed around him and let me in on his weaknesses. I glanced up quickly and let the name fall from my tongue.

"Jace. Jace Lightwood." I lied smoothly, "My family are in there- I need to get to them."

The man looked me up and down, his eyebrows furrowed.

"Lightwood, you say? You look nothing like them."

"I'm adopted. Valentine murdered my parents." I said, smiling inwardly.

"And they were?"

"Stephen and Celine Herondale." I said, recalling what I'd heard my father say. The man's eyes widened and he looked away, embarrassed.

"I knew them. They were good people."

"I wouldn't know." I answered, trying to sound bitter but coming across more impatient.

"Of course. I apologise. And... Jace, is it?" I nodded, "I remember you now... you're the boy who's... _ah_. I apologise about the order on your girlfriend, but these things must be done..."

I just watched him, closing off my face so it was unreadable. His mouth twisted uncomfortably and he looked away.

"Go on. Get in quick before the battle starts. You're not old enough to fight." He said and ushered me past Downworlder's and Shadowhunter's towards the demon towers that made up the city gates- towards my goal.

We were steps away when someone called out.

"Joshua?"

The man beside me turned around. I followed suit curiously to see a long limbed Downworlder loping towards us, looking bored and utterly disturbing. He wore canary yellow leather pants and a black ruffle neck shirt that clung to his body in way's I'd never imagined possible before. My eyebrows shot up in to my hair line. He looked vaguely familiar...

"Bane?" Joshua said with agitation.

"Who's your fine friend?" the warlock- I could tell by his eyes- asked, smiling at me briefly like a pleased cat.

"I don't have time for this, warlock." Joshua said angrily and pushed me towards the gates. I bit down my anger and thought about how close I was until the warlock suddenly popped up in front of us, leaning lazily against the gate and staring at his fingernails.

"Not sure you want to let that boy near the gates." Was all he said as he pulled out a nail file from his back pocket.

"Why not?" Joshua said indignantly. The warlock looked up slowly and inclined his head towards me. I felt some strange emotion roll from him.

Suspicion.

But that wasn't all. There was something else outlining the emotion; something that I couldn't fully grasp. I narrowed my eyes slightly, trying to concentrate on working it out.

"Who are you, boy?" the warlock asked me directly. I kept eye contact with him as I repeated the name I'd given Joshua without thinking about it.

"Jace Lightwood."

The warlock didn't waste time; he threw his hand out and I felt my feet leave the floor. A tight, invisible grip appeared around my throat as I hung uselessly in mid air, though it barely hurt me. His face was an inch from mine when he hissed,

"Liar. Princess doesn't go by Lightwood, he calls himself Wayland and I know for a fact he's already inside the walls at the hall of accords, arguing with the Clave about your sister's death sentence, Jonathan Morgenstern."

The crowd around us erupted; there was no other word for it. I simply laughed and watched the warlock through tight eyes.

"Wrong. Jace _Wayland_ is with my father, half dead on the back of a horse _because_ of my sister." I smiled.

The warlock smiled back, his expression just as cunning and sly as my own.

"You've been played, Jonathan. You underestimate your sister."

"Whatever, I don't have time for the riddles of filth like you." I growled and kicked against his chest. He flew backwards, hitting hard against the crystal gates. I dropped to the floor lightly and unfolded myself from my crouch, watching the Shadowhunter's and vermin panicking around me with a smile. With a sharp flick of each of my wrists, the crowd around me parted and I walked purposefully towards the gate, cutting a long, thin trail down the length of my forearm just like I'd demonstrated to Clarissa earlier. The blood glistened and pooled around the wound, clinging to the fabric of my shirt before it trickled gently down the length of my arm. Not one person broke free of my bindings and I stopped in front of the gates, meeting no resistance though an alarm was sounding throughout the city and the frenzied voices of their allied troops met my ears in the breeze.

I held out my now bloodied hand and let it hang in front of the glass warding for a moment. My hand met a fair amount of resistance as it hovered there; the invisible warding sensing my demon blood and putting up a defence against it. I smiled and flicked my eyes to where the Warlock was struggling against my hold. His eyes were wild and he was desperately trying to break free of the bonds that held him in place. He screamed out a name just as I placed my hand on the wards but the sound was lost to the sound of crumbling glass.

I took a measured step back and watched the _mighty_ demon towers of Alicante splintered and fell with a grin. Very slowly, I looked to the sky and held up my hands, laughing. Black clouds gathered and rain began to lash down almost immediately, hitting my face and washing away the bloodstains that had dried there. A rush of heat erupted from my body and I felt myself releasing every bit of power I possessed. The echoing screams were enough to let me know the demons had arrived.

"Dinner time," I grinned.

* * *

**JPOV**

Something was wrong.

Really, _really_ wrong.

Just a couple of seconds ago the Hall of Accords had been buzzing with heated conversation. I'd been facing up to Inquisitor Aldertree about his death sentence on Clary, swearing and shoving until his face had turned a blotchy, angry red. Now the entire place was filled with a horrifying silence that ate away at my insides like a ravenous demon. The silence was eerie and was punctuated only by the sound of the wet thumping of our collective heartbeat.

And then...

Then the silence was over, only to be replaced by a sound so heartbreaking and soul destroying that I was sure Raziel himself was screaming from the heavens. The room shook violently and people were tossed to the floor, hitting hard against the cracked glass panels. I felt my legs buckle below me and I collapsed to the ground in what felt like slow motion, hitting my head with a sickening crack against the edge of one of the solid glass steps. I felt a scream rip out of my mouth but I couldn't hear it over the ringing in my ears and the blinding pain in the back of my head. Nausea rolled through my stomach and I gasped in a deep breath, trying to reign in the sickness but it was no use. I heaved and blinked tears as bile passed through my lips.

Rough hands grabbed my face and turned my head sharply. I saw Alec's icy blue eyes grimace at the blood on his hands before he ripped away a strip from his shirt and wiped it across my mouth. I could see his lips moving, telling me something, but the ringing in my ears was still too loud and the words were muffled. I pulled my eyebrows together and watched him carefully.

"What?" I whispered dazedly, "What's happening?"

He tossed the strip to one side and gripped his shoulder. It looked strangely limp, like it was dislocated.

"They're here," I heard him say in a barely there voice as he stared off at something behind me with wide, terrified eyes. I tried to move to see what he was looking at but his hand slammed down on my chest and I collapsed under the pressure.

"You need to stay down. It would be really, really bad if they saw you right now." He hissed.

"If who saw me?" I asked, confused. His eyes flicked to mine for a long moment before finding the source of his nervousness yet again.

"Valentine. He's in here. With Clary and _you_."

* * *

**CPOV**

I spotted the real Jace as soon as I came through the portal. He'd fallen to the floor at the bottom of the steps only a few metres away from where I stood with the fake Jace in my grasp, a seraph blade to its 'throat'. The room was still shaking a little from the aftermath of the glass towers crumbling away because of my brother's blood, but all I could think about was whether or not Valentine had spotted the real Jace or not.

His cold eyes scanned the room placidly, taking in the fallen bodies of the people he considered his enemies but he didn't focus on one thing. He looked over the place where Jace lay with Alec hovering beside him without pausing for a second glance. I watched his lips curl in to a smile and he clapped his hands together twice. A row of his guardians came to a halt behind him, each wielding their weapons with blank, lifeless faces.

"Since you're all here, I assume you're going to join me?" he said calmly, his hands clasped. No one in the room moved; the spectators watched as Valentine continued to survey them with his keen eyes and his smile widened.

"You do realise," he drawled, "that if you came to the Hall of Accords with no intention of joining me, you will all die? Within the city an infinite army of demons is taking down your precious fighters. It won't take them long to purge the city and make their way to this place. They flock to the pounding of hearts and the smell of blood like insects and devour everything in their way. My son holds the power to control every single one of them. One message from me and he can have them here in an instant, you won't stand a chance. Now, I ask you again. Are you here to join me?"

"We won't go down without a fight. We don't negotiate with traitors." One man yelled from his place on the floor. Valentine raised an eyebrow and waved his hand in my direction.

"Well let me show you what happens to people who disagree with me, Inquisitor Aldertree. Clarissa. The boy, if you will."

My heart pounded in my chest as I took a measured step towards him, gripping the fake Jace tightly. I could feel his arm trembling beneath my grip. There wasn't long now. Not long at all until the first part of my plan would take effect. I swallowed back my nerves and held my head high.

"Clary... what's going on?" he said loudly. I saw the attention of most of the room switch to me and the fake Jace; their expressions changing to one of confusion as they caught sight of the real thing on the ground beside Alec. He'd managed to struggle on to his stomach and was staring straight at me. My breath hitched in my throat and he tried to force a grin, but it looked like a painful grimace.

"Clary!" the fake said again, struggling against my hold. He didn't understand what was happening. He didn't know that he was just a ruse; that he didn't really exist. Tears pricked against my eyes as I thought about him. He was like a small child; he didn't really know anything. He clung to me as I tried to shove him towards my father like a toddler would cling to their mother. I'd grown close to him in the last few days even though he wasn't technically real. He'd listened to me cry and complain and laugh without a second thought. He'd attempted to make me smile when I was sad even though he had no real idea of what happiness was—he only had hazy, half-there memories of what the emotion was. And now it was time for him to disappear. In a few minutes he'd be nothing but the scorched remains of a rune on the glass floor.

"Jace Wayland," Valentine said as he took the fake in his hands and placed a blade to its throat, "is a young man who possesses the blood of an angel. In fact, his body holds the same angel blood as my daughters. However, unlike my daughter he is disobedient to his creator. I made him the way he is and I reserve the right to take all that away from him. So I ask now for the final time, will you join me or will you watch what will happen to every one of you if you oppose me?"

"You've been deceived, Valentine." A familiar voice said. I watched as my mother stepped out of the crowd, a smile across her face.

"You should just give in now before lives are lost for no real reason."

Valentine looked at her coldly for a long moment but didn't bother speaking to her. He kept his eyes locked on her as he said, "Clarissa, begin the rune."

I nodded helplessly and dropped to my knees, taking my time in pulling out my stele and preparing to begin drawing it. My eyes met Jace's and he raised his eyebrows. I knew what he was saying and I understood the panic that was etched in to his features. If I did complete the rune, my plan would be over. The Downworlder's would die.

But... if I didn't complete the rune and my father noticed too soon, he'd realise what was going on and everything would be over a lot faster.

"Shadowhunter's, in a few minutes this rune will be complete and the Downworlder's will be erased from the earth. I see you've opted to go against me. It is a shame to spill precious blood but I will oblige your death sentence." he finished, and before I knew what he'd done, he'd cut the fake Jace's throat. A tiny sob came out of my mouth and I pressed my hands to my lips, eyeing my father with terrified eyes. The clone dropped to the floor leaking crimson blood, but it didn't take long at all for him to start disappearing. Valentine watched, horrified, until the fake was nothing but a rune once again.

He stood still for countless heartbeats, just staring at the ground where 'Jace' had just been, but eventually he seemed to animate again and began to turn to me extremely slowly.

"What... was that?" he asked through gritted teeth. I shied away from his gaze and gripped my seraph blade tightly in my hand, preparing for the order for his guards to take me. There was nothing I could think of to say that would buy me the time that I needed, so I kept my lips pressed tightly together.

"Pretty cool, wasn't it?" the real Jace's voice said from below me. He pushed against Alec's grip and pulled himself to his feet, gripping a sword in his hand. He took a shaky step towards us, his sword grinding against the floor; metal on glass.

"You?" Valentine said evenly, though I could see traces of panic cross through his eyes.

"Me. Hi there. How's the whole world domination plan working out for you?" Jace asked sarcastically, running a hand through his hair so he could inspect the clotted blood there.

"How is this possible?" Valentine demanded. Jace shrugged and wiped his hand on his pants.

"Anything is possible in you close your eyes and wish hard enough." He grinned slyly as he reached the top step. He was so close to Valentine now; all my father had to do was slash out with his sword and he'd hit Jace. I stood rooted to the spot, unable to move myself. Valentine's hand twitched around the hilt of his sword.

"Make one move towards my son and we'll attack." Maryse Lightwood said icily from beside my mother. They glared at Valentine with such ferocious loathing that a weaker man would have dropped dead from one glance.

"I'm more than willing to oblige, Maryse," he growled and lunged towards the unsuspecting Jace.

I acted of my own accord. Before my brain had even processed my body's actions, the sight of seeing Valentine try to kill the real Jace immediately drove me to gripping my sword and driving it in to soft, sickeningly yielding flesh. In the midst of my confusion and distress, all I could focus on was how curious it was that the blade cut through a human body so easily. Skin and bone were nothing compared to the killing power of a well trained swordsman. But to find it so easy to drive steel through one's own father...

I truly was some kind of monster in my own right.

"Cla…rissa?" Valentine whispered, his eyes searching mine. I threw up walls around my emotions, making sure he saw nothing but blankness in my stare. I pushed harder on the blade and I felt it rip through the back of his shirt, letting me know that I'd pierced through his body- and his spine, judging from the shattering noise.

He hadn't even bothered wearing body armor. I couldn't believe he was sure enough to go in to battle without wearing armor.

I stared at him, unable to believe I'd actually done it. Panic and uproar flared all around me. I could vaguely hear people shouting and the sound of steel on steel, and I could tell that Shadowhunter's were surrounding me, protecting me from my father's army, but all I cared about was the man in front of me and the anger that suddenly flared inside me.

"Your first mistake was underestimating me." I said shakily, "The second was assuming some low grade warlock would be able to erase my memories and turn me against the people I love. The last mistake you'll ever make was daring to attack Jace. I love him, father. More than I've ever dreamed of loving you. If it ever came down to you or him, I'd choose him _every single time_." I said through my teeth. His eyes glazed over as he tried to keep his focus on me.

"I'm… proud of you… you managed to deceive me. You… truly are a… Morgenstern." he said, a tiny smile appearing on his face. His bloodstained hands shook under the massive wound my sword had made, finally taking up the image of the countless lives he'd ordered to be taken.

"I know. That's the part that sickens me the most." I whispered. Unwillingly, tears began to fall from my eyes and I couldn't stop their flow. I choked on a sob and took in a rattled, exhausted breath.

"I'm sorry dad, but I couldn't let you do this." I cried and twisted the sword to the right, ripping the wound open further and causing him to cry out in pain. I couldn't seem to pull my eyes from his and they glazed even heavier and his legs began to sag beneath him.

"If I could make this go any other way, I would. Believe me I'd give anything for things to be different. But you and Jonathan have to die. It's the only way."

"Cla…" he managed to choke, but with a sudden surge of frenzied emotion, I pulled the sword from him quickly and dropped it to the floor as he sank to his knees. I soon followed him, crawling my way to his side and pushing his hair from his face tenderly. He blinked lethargically and his mouth gaped open as his hands fumbled against his chest. I clasped them tightly in my own.

"Hail and farewell, father." I whispered and bent to kiss his forehead. My lips had just touched his skin when I heard a long exhalation of breath in my ear and I knew he was gone.

It had taken less than two minutes for the powerful Valentine Morgenstern to fall. Two minutes, and he was dead.

It had taken two minutes for me to murder my father.

It sickened me that I felt liberated.

* * *

**There you go. It didn't turn out exactly how I wanted it but I think it's good enough considering the circumstances. Just a quick note; I know Valentine's death seems rushed but I promise dealings with Jonathan, weather he lives or dies (not telling), will make up for it considering he's kind of the puppet master in all of this. He controls the demons and all **** Next chapter (should) be better, and it will include a lot of fighting. **

**Please tell me what you thought! Review!**

**Love and apologies, ML**

_Who can avoid the sins of the fathers? But you go ahead kid; it's your turn to walk on water. _


	15. Important, for the sake of our sanity

Hello everyone.

You (might) be pleased to hear that the next chapter of Kismet has been sent to my beta and I will upload it as soon as it's been sent back with corrections.

I know I took my time updating but I have a life, and I also got so bored of this story that I was consequently riddled with writers block. I needed to take a step back from it for a while in order to want to start writing it again for you guys. So, while I really do appreciate the fact it should only take so long to write a 3000 word chapter, I hope you guys can understand that I didn't update sooner because I wanted it to be something worth reading, instead of something emotionless and dry.

Thanks again, hope to hear what you all think very soon.

ML.


	16. The Beginning of the End

**A/N: I don't own TMI.**

**Oh look, I updated. To the people who messaged and reviews saying you understand why I had to take a break, thank you. And I'd also like to say a HUGE thank you to my wonderful beta Ashley for being patient and sorting out the mess that was this chapter :) You're amazing, thanks.**

**I hope you guys enjoy this chapter. It took some effort to get out ha.**

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**JPOV**

"Get out of the way!" I screamed at Clary. She was still clutching at her dead father's body. Fat tears rolled silently from her eyes, spilling down her pale face onto the floor beneath her. Chaos had erupted all around us but she had no attention to spare for anything but him.

Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted a flurry of movement. Without a second thought, I swung my sword out, taking down the woman that was rushing toward us. She fell to the ground with a heavy thump, blood spilling thickly from the gaping wound in her neck. I exhaled heavily, still feeling the blow to my head from my fall earlier, and turned quickly away from the sight of the viscous liquid ebbing through the cracks in the glass floor.

"Clary, get the hell up now or you're gonna get killed!" I growled in her ear, grabbing her forearm tightly. I tried to pull her to her feet but she was deadweight in my arms.

"I killed him," she whispered, running a finger lightly over Valentine's temple.

"Yeah, you did, but now they're going to kill you if you don't _move_."

"Kill me?" she said slowly, turning her eyes to meet mine. I didn't react. She looked so dazed, like she was only just aware of whom I was. Her eyes narrowed gently as she watched me, my own darting around our immediate area to make sure we weren't going to be attacked. My alertness wasn't needed though. A ring of Clave members had formed around us, fighting off those who came our way with any kind of murderous intent.

"Jace," I heard her whisper softly, pulling me out of my examination. She blinked away her tears and took my face in her hands, studying it carefully.

"I don't know if this is the time for-" I began uneasily, feeling the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end as a shrill scream pierced the air behind me. My voice was rough and cracked but I was cut off by her lips on my own. She kissed me softly, tugging at the curls on the back of my neck. I could feel hot tears on her skin and her breath caught in her throat as she pulled away.

"Hello," she sighed after a moment, a small smile curling at the corner of her lips. I stared at her, open mouthed, before shaking my head and dragging her to her feet.

"You're insane. There's a battle going on and all you want to do is _kiss_ me? What kind of-?"

"Duck!" she yelled and I acted on impulse, dropping to the ground and rolling onto my back, sword at the ready. Clary arced her own twin blades through the air in a cross towards a man's neck. He avoided her blow with a wrist shattering parry and span to face me, his lips pulled back over his bared, bloody teeth. I growled as I kicked up from the ground, swiping at his torso ruthlessly, but he was already immobile by the time I acted. I could see a thin sliver of gold squeezing like a viper around his neck and after a few incredibly long moments, his knees buckled and he fell to the ground in a heap. Izzy stood a little way behind him, scowling at the now dead man as she flicked her whip back around her wrist.

"Stay the hell away from my family," she muttered before flashing a blinding smile and winking at the pair of us. We watched as she turned on her heel and sprinted back into the throng of people.

"She's scary when she's mad," Clary observed.

"You've honestly never noticed before?" I asked dryly. "Whatever. Don't you have a sibling to destroy?" I added, though my chuckle was cut short by the dark shadow that passed across her face.

"Let's go," she said, setting off at a sprint. I readied my weapons and followed her toward the mess of people, living and dead. Even with the Clave members surrounding us, we wove our way quickly through the fight. I covered Clary when her father's comrades broke the protective ring to lunge and swipe at her; striking them down with spurts of energy I wasn't sure I should have been capable of. We reached the entrance to the Hall of Accords with minimal damage to ourselves, only to find that the doors had been barricaded shut.

"I don't have time for this!" Clary growled, frustrated, and drew out her stele.

"What're you doing?" I hissed over the shattering sound of my sword connecting with another.

"You might want to take a step back," she said shortly as she began to trace a rune on the door. I nodded obediently and moved away from the area in which she was working, finally managing to subdue my attacker. I watched her avidly for a long moment before I felt a sharp, burning pain shoot through my back.

"Ah," I mumbled, folding in on myself in pain. I heard a voice laughing quietly behind me and I spun around just in time to barely block an attack from a fairly petite woman with a fierce smile on her face. She held my parry with a strong, one-handed grip, glaring at me the entire time with hooded, dark eyes beneath the cover of a matted, grey cloak. I pressed harder and broke the block, bringing my sword back through the air towards her abdomen. Like lightening, she withdrew a second blade from a sheath at her hip and swung the swords simultaneously, catching my cheek with the very tip of one. I hissed out my pain, seeing a small spatter of blood arc through the air from the wound. She laughed loudly and attacked relentlessly, spinning and whirling through the air as if she were flying. I spun out my own attacks and parries, gaining more height and speed than her, but the force behind her blows was unbelievable.

A well-placed blow with the hilt of her sword had me on the ground, winded, and cringing for breath. She paced toward me slowly, her eyes flashing like a predator stalking its wounded prey. Her long blonde locks were matted with thick clumps of scarlet blood, her mouth pulled into an insane, crimson smile. She towered over me and, with her face inches from mine, she brought her sword to my throat. I squeezed my eyes tightly, physically incapable of moving. I bit the skin of my bottom lip, anticipating her deathblow but thinking of nothing but Clary. Her face was all I saw in the blackness behind my eyelids, her voice the only sound in my ears. It felt like hours passed as I relived the precious moments since I'd met her, patiently waiting to die with her image imprinted in my mind.

Time kept passing. The blow didn't come.

I opened my eyes eventually to see the woman slumped against a second corpse, an arrow lodged firmly in the back of her head. My eyes traveled around the room, searching for the hidden archer until they landed on a figure, perched up high on a window 'd already reloaded his weapon, aimed carefully into the crowd and begun picking off Circle members, one by one, with deadly precision**.** I only knew of one Shadowhunter with an aim as precise as this.

Alec.

I reminded myself to buy him and Izzy something nice if we all made it out of this mess alive.

I barely had time to drag myself from the ground when the explosion of Clary's rune knocked me back off my feet. I landed awkwardly on my side and felt the searing pain of my shoulder blade snapping out of place instantly. I held back a scream, drawing blood as I bit down on my tongue to stop the noise. The taste of iron filled my mouth, making me gag. I didn't have time to lay useless on the ground; I had to help Clary. We had to find her brother and get rid of him before it was too late.

With a groan, I spat out the blood, stood up, and hurried to where Clary was crouched, her hands over her ears. She looked up at me with concern, rising so we were face to face.

"Your arm. Are you okay?" she asked as we began to plough our way through the shrapnel left behind from the explosion. I nodded grimly and managed a dark chuckle.

"I'll be fine," I said, trying to keep my face straight.

"I did tell you to move back," she muttered, casting me a worried sidelong glance as we burst onto the white marble steps outside the Hall of Accords.

"I was a little busy trying not to be decapitated," I snapped back, only to feel embarrassed a moment later. It wasn't her fault that I'd been pinned down, and neither was it her fault that I was caught in the blast. I sighed and took her hand tightly.

"Sorry."

"For what? Being irritated? You're not the one whose family caused this mess," she pointed out. I kept silent and turned to face the city below us. Nothing could have prepared me for what I found waiting.

The entire city was burning crimson and orange. Flames danced and licked delicately up the sides of buildings, caressing them in a deadly dance. Amongst the flames I could see Shadowhunters and Downworlders both battling it out against hordes of demons. They were barely visible shadows amongst the inferno, but it was clear which side was winning. Clary swore under her breath and took off down the steps, dragging me alongside her.

"We have to find Jonathan," she called to me, letting go of my hand so she could draw her blades. Without a fault in her step, she took out two demons that had appeared either side of her, and immobilized another. I guarded the rear, attacking anything that came up behind us even though my arm and back were burning with unforgiving pain. Within minutes of running through flame and rubble, we were both covered from head to foot in ichor and blood.

"Where would he be?" I called to her as we fought back to back against a crowd of demons. She took down a particularly large Oni demon and wiped her forehead quickly with the back of her arm.

"I don't know. We need to find somewhere safe so I can find out."

"Safe?" I called, slashing down the Scythe demon that had reared in front of me. "Hate to break it to you but nowhere is safe in Alicante anymore."

"You're perceptive, Wayland," a voice said in my ear. I froze immediately when I felt the tip of a sword digging uncomfortably in the small of my back.

"To be honest, I'm pretty curious as to why you're still living. Feel like shedding some light on the situation, Clarissa?" Jonathan said in his snide voice. Clary simply stared at him, gripping her blades so tight in her hands that her knuckles turned white.

"It's not very often that you're speechless," he observed. "Do I have to do something drastic to make you to speak?"

"Jonathan," she whispered, her voice shaking. He laughed quietly and pushed the sword harder, breaking my skin. I bit back the pain, keeping my eyes on Clary.

"What's the story, then? This guy suddenly changed sides? You're using him to get an advantage? Come on, Clary. I want to hear the kind of excuse your overactive imagination comes up with this time. You should really tell me sooner rather than later, at any rate. Who knows what I might do if I get bored."

Clary's eyes narrowed into slits and she squared her shoulders, raising her blades an inch from her hips.

"I think it's time the charade ended," Clary said clearly as she dropped her swords, taking a step toward us. I shook my head minutely, praying for her to stop, to turn and run; to do _anything_ other than get closer. It wasn't out of fear for myself. It was fear for her, for what might happen if she got too close to him. The thought of her dying was to impossible to even comprehend.

"Don't come any closer," Jonathan growled and she stopped. I let out an unsettled but relieved breath and closed my eyes briefly.

"I thought you might have figured it out earlier than this," Clary began, pushing her hair out of her eyes. "Actually, I thought you'd figure it out as soon as I started pretending. I'm a little disappointed, but I'm glad. If you'd guessed any earlier, I would've never gotten this far." She sounded confident, but I could see the panic flicker behind her eyes.

"What can I say? Your acting skills have improved. I should have known from the beginning, that's true. As soon as father tried to make the warlock erase your memories it should have been obvious, but you were really trying hard. You can do whatever the hell you like when you put your mind to it, apparently. I just don't understand why. Was it for him?" He shoved against my back again and I winced. Clary's eyes met mine for a single moment, a tiny smile pulling at the corner of her mouth, and she turned away.

"Partly, but not entirely."

"What does that mean?"

"What you and Valentine were planning on doing… it's wrong. How could any sane person sit by and watch that happen?"

"You sat by and watched for a long time. Don't forget, you even helped," Jonathan pointed out, his voice nothing but a low hiss.

"It's true. I did help. But then I saw sense."

"Don't try and claim ignorance. You still killed Downworlders. You still tortured Shadowhunters for information. You can't take that back."

"I know that and I will accept any punishment I get for what I did," Clary said, jutting out her chin with narrow eyes.

I swallowed the lump in my throat. I'd known she'd been involved in terrible things in her past ever since she'd told us who she really was, but it didn't stop the nausea that rolled through me when I heard the proof from someone else's mouth. I'd almost deluded myself in to thinking she'd never actually harmed anyone, but the proof was thrust in front of me over and over again in the way she fought, the way she schemed and now from her own brother's mouth. It was like a slap to the face, but it was the reality check I needed. It didn't change the way I felt about her, but it was a truth that was hard to swallow.

"You can accept the punishment all you like but can you accept the guilt? You have to admit you loved killing in the end. You loved the power you felt when your blade was driving through their filthy bodies. You're just as bad as I am."

"Don't _ever_ compare me to you again. You're a psychopath. You're completely insane, just like father was," Clary hissed. Jonathan threw his head back and laughed heartily, his chest shaking.

"_Was_? What? Are you going to claim that he's finally seen the light and called for a 'cease fire' now? Please. Go ahead. Make my day."

A dark shadow passed across Clary's face as she stared him in the eyes. Jonathan shifted his weight uncomfortably, slightly dropping the blade from my back. It only took me a second to realize she was going to say something stupid; something that would set the wheel in motion, something that would spark the beginning of the end. Whose end, I couldn't guess, but we couldn't all make it out of this alive.

Clary set her shoulders and eyed her brother for a long moment, remorse clear in the line of her mouth and the dull shine of her eyes. I dropped my head as the words tumbled from her mouth, preparing myself for what was to come.

"He's dead, Jonathan. Valentine is dead, and I killed him."

* * *

**CPOV**

"Dead?" Jonathan repeated lamely, his eyebrows pulled into a scowl. I nodded slowly, my fists in tight balls at my sides.

"You killed our father," he continued in the same empty voice. This time it was more like a statement, like he was trying to process the information I was feeding him, and not succeeding.

"Yes. Up in the Hall of Accords, just now. He's dead," I explained. I watched carefully as Jonathan's face became completely blank for a long moment before he erupted into hysterical laughter.

"Valentine is dead? He's _dead_. That means the cards are finally in my hands. _I'm in control_." He laughed. His face was almost unrecognizable for the psychotic grin that had spread across it. I stood, motionless, as he laughed louder and harder; so hard that tears spilled from the corners of his eyes. He pushed Jace away from him with the tip of his sword, doubling over in his glee when he saw Jace collapse as his feet, clearly unconscious. I had to bite on my tongue to stop myself from screaming Jace's name; had to try so hard to root myself to the ground and not go running to his injured body. He looked like a broken doll; his shoulder hanging limply as if independent from the rest of his body. Thin streams of blood trickled down his neck from the wound on his back.

I inhaled a shaky breath and watched as Jonathan's hands reached for his tear stained cheeks, brushing away the moisture so he could see it on his own hands. His laughter increased as he viewed the tears he'd shed but his face was full of awe. I didn't think I'd seen Jonathan cry in years.

It was in that moment that I realized the rune I'd placed on him earlier was beginning to take effect. Now that we were finally together in the city, the runes had activated. He was becoming human. All I had left to do was draw the rune that would create the final bonding between us and then…

"Well, thank you Clarissa. You just saved me a job. I was just on my way to dispose of that idiot myself," he said once his laughter had calmed down somewhat. I remained silent, only moving to bend and snatch up my seraph blades from the ground. He wiped the tears quickly from his cheeks, taking another moment to pause and observe them with mild interest.

"You were going to kill him yourself?" I asked incredulously. Jonathan nodded, not taking his eyes away from his hands.

"I'm not afraid to admit my greed and lust for power, Clarissa," he said placidly, turning one hand this way and that. Slowly, he let his hands drop and his eyes came to meet my own.

"What have you done to me?" he asked in an almost friendly tone, the corners of his mouth curving up into a grotesque mockery of a smile.

"I don't understand what you're asking," I lied smoothly, taking a neat step back into a fighting lunge. Jonathan exhaled and raised his eyebrows.

"Why can I cry?"

Before the words had even escaped his mouth I dived for him, tackling him to the floor with all of my weight. He thrashed against me, hammering at the centre of my spine with the hilt of his blade. I cried out in agony but held him firmly to the ground, my knees crushing his chest and neck. Quickly, I drew out my stele and held his hand down on the ground by the side of his head, quickly disposing of his sword by throwing it down a nearby flight of stairs. He growled and kicked against me but I was too quick. My stele crashed down on the palm of his hand and I drew the first half of the rune in careful slashes, not caring if it caused him pain. As soon as I'd finished with his hand, I shifted my weight and drew the partner rune on my own palm, cringing against the strangled cry of pain coming from my brother.

As soon as I'd finished, I tossed my stele to the side and rolled onto the ground beside my brother, pressing our palms together. The pain was horrific; I'd never felt anything as blinding and cutting as this before. It was like my very soul was being torn from my chest. I was hardly aware of Jonathan's screams to my side, but I could feel hot, sticky liquid ebbing from his every pore, evaporating into the air after a few seconds.

The demon blood was leaving his body.

He was finally becoming human again.

* * *

**So? Review and let me know what you thought. If you're going to flame, please be tasteful. I think the next chapter will be the last and will be closely followed by an epilogue (which is already written, so I'll put them both up at the same time) Thanks for sticking with me.**

**ML**


	17. Hail and Farewell

**Disclaimer: I do not own TMI, nor do I own any of the characters, objects or places affiliated with the series. The plot, however, is mine. **

**Hi there.**

**It's been a long time, hasn't it? Over a year. But here we are, it's the end of the road. This will be the last chapter of Kismet. I expect I'll go over this story again. I've changed a lot over the last year, as has my writing style. I'll be editing small parts of the story- punctuation, spelling mistakes, adding little bits in and changing some minor parts. Nothing big. I just want to story to read better. **

**I won't go in to the nitty gritty of why I haven't been around on here for so long in this AN, but you know, if you're interested in finding out, just message me. It'll be nice to talk to you guys again. It's been so long.**

**Okay, without any further ado, this is the last chapter. I hope you enjoy it and let me know your thoughts.**

**ML**

* * *

**CPOV**

Jonathan screamed for what felt like an eternity. The sound was horrifying; it cut straight through my body like a knife. He writhed at my side, his nails scraping and splitting against the flagstone beneath him but all I could do was sit still by his side, my knees tucked up against my chest and tears slowly trailing down my cheeks. I wasn't upset. I was scared. I was scared of myself, of the things I'd done tonight. I had killed my own father; stabbed him straight through the heart. And now I was about to finish off my brother.

Did that make me a monster, too? The apple doesn't fall too far from the tree, after all.

Since I'd surfaced from the pain of the rune I'd placed on myself, I'd felt woozy. In fact, I was sick to my stomach. I let out a harsh string of hacking coughs, doubling over on myself in pain. It was a few minutes before the coughing stopped. I wiped my mouth, eyes heavy, and balked when I spotted the drops of glittering red on my hand. I stared at them for a long moment, fear settling in to my stomach. This wasn't supposed to happen. I closed my eyes tightly for a second before straightening up and brushing my hand against my gear. I swiped the tears away from my face quickly and gave Jonathan a hard look.

He was silent now, the screaming having subsided in to labored breaths. His eyes were open slightly and I was almost taken aback. I'd become accustomed to his pitch black eyes over the last few years and it sent an ache through my heart to see bright blue in their place. My breath caught in my throat. It had really worked. The demon blood was gone from him. He was truly human again. Just a normal Shadow Hunter.

But that didn't change anything.

My hand slid to my side and my fist tightened around the hilt of the seraph blade at my hip. I drew it out slowly, whispering its name. It glowed with life, humming beneath my skin.

"Clarissa…" Jonathan breathed heavily. My eyes met his quickly and I pointed the blade to his throat, my hand unwavering.

"Jonathan." I said levelly. My resolve was set. He coughed like I had not too long ago, blood escaping his mouth in little spatters that freckled my face. I brushed them away with my free hand and rested my knee against his chest.

"Don't even think about moving." I growled as he shifted beneath my weight. He kept his eyes on mine, a small smile drawing up at the corner of his mouth.

"So this is what mortality feels like, huh?" he half coughed. I didn't bother him with a reply. There was a single fat tear rolling down the side of his face and, despite myself, I reached down and brushed it away.

"Can't say I'm a fan," he breathed.

My chest grew tight and the coughing began again, even worse than it had been before. I felt light headed as I saw the blood escape my mouth on to my hand. I didn't have long.

"You too, huh? Isn't that poetic. We both die at the same time. I bet you weren't expecting that. The rune wasn't supposed to kill you too, was it?" Jonathan grinned. I pressed my blade closer to his neck, drawing a bead of blood with the tip across is Adams apple.

"Shut up."

"I wonder if mom's still alive. Imagine that, if every single Morgenstern died out tonight. I suppose you could call it justice."

"Jonathan, I'm warning you, if you don't shut up I'm going to-"

"You're going to what, Clary? Kill me? Isn't that what you should have done before I regained consciousness?" he hissed and threw his weight against me. I flew backwards on to the ground, hitting my head against the concrete. My blade clattered at my side and Jonathan swiped it up within a second.

"I might be weak and dying and _mortal_, Clarissa, but I'm still better than you." He said as his foot crushed against my elbow. I hissed in pain, biting on my tongue to keep the screams within me. His bloodstained mouth smiled down at me as he span my blade in his hand expertly before driving it down in to my shoulder blade, pinning me to the ground. I couldn't contain my screams this time. The pain seared through me and I struggled against his pin to no avail- it only caused more pain. I could hear him laughing over the ringing in my ears and he ground his foot harder in to my elbow. I felt the bones snap and splinter; I threw my head to the side and let the blood and vomit escape my mouth.

"You're weak!" he cried, his eyes wild and glittering. There was blood around his own mouth from his coughing. He was starting to panic, "You're weak yet you still act so proud. You think you're such a martyr, sacrificing yourself to save the rest of that screwed up race and those _filthy_ Downworlder's. Well you're not, Clary. You're as selfish and self absorbed as I am in this. Were both going to die alone, with no one to tell us it's alright. No one to say 'hail and farewell'. We're going to burn, Clary. You and me. We're going to burn."

"You're wrong," I choked out and swung the fist of my free arm in to his face. It made contact with his nose, shattering the bone under the force. He groaned and slipped backwards, cupping his nose in agony. We both breathed heavily, tiredly, in unison. I looked briefly at the blade through my shoulder and whimpered, closing my eyes tightly. I reached for the hilt with a trembling hand and gripped it firmly, waiting for a long moment before yanking it with all of my strength. It came loose with a tug and I sat up, my eyes settling firmly on my brother.

And the person that loomed above him.

* * *

**JPOV**

I drove the hilt of Jonathan's sword against its owners head and watched as he crumpled to the floor with a thud. I stared at his unmoving body at my feet, my eyes unforgiving.

"Jace," Clary gasped, making to stand up but I shook my head and dropped to my knees beside her, abandoning the sword on the ground.

"Are you okay?" I asked numbly, surveying the gaping wound on her shoulder. Her entire right arm hung limply at her side and she was covered in her own blood, her face white as a sheet.

"I'll be fine," she panted, attempting to move her body. I pressed my hand against her face gently and she stopped, looking me dead in the eyes. Hers were red, her face blotched with tears.

"We need to get you out of here. You need to be somewhere safe." I said. She shook her head.

"I can't leave him like that. I have to end this now."

"You can't be serious. You're barely alive yourself right now, you need to find help, your mom or Magnus. You need someone who can fix you." I pressed. She opened her mouth to protest but I silenced her with my own. She tasted like blood and it only set my resolve further.

"Here, can you stand?" I held out my hand for her and she took it with her good arm, struggling to find her balance. Behind me I could head Jonathan starting to cough and faint shuffles of movement.

"Jace-"

"Get out of here Clary. I'll finish this off. You have to get somewhere safe."

"I'm not going to leave you here with him."

"I can handle this. Just go. Now. Please, if you never listen to me again, please just listen to me now. _I can handle this_," I said, panic flaring within me as I heard him begin to scramble to his feet. Clary's eyes were wide with fear and pain and after a long moment of silence, she nodded her head.

"I'll bring help. Alec, Izzy, anyone I can find."

"Don't worry about me. Just get somewhere safe." I said, pushing her gently.

"Jace…"

"Just go!" I shouted as her eyes welled up. She grabbed my hand with a wince and squeezed it weakly.

"I love you okay? Whatever happens to me, I love you. And I want you to be happy." A fat tear rolled from her eye and my brow furrowed in confusion.

"Nothing is going to happen to you okay? Or me. We're going to be fine. Don't talk like this is it."

"But I have to tell you-"

"Later. Tell me later." I said, my tone final. I swiped up the sword from the ground and turned my back on her then walked the small distance to her brother. I could hear her calling my name but I didn't turn back. All I cared about was her safety. And in her state right now, she was far from safe. There was a long moment where I thought she was going to stay, but I heard her begin to run, the sound of her footsteps getting further away.

"Playing the hero, huh?" Jonathan coughed. He wiped his mouth and inspected the blood with morbid curiosity. I didn't reply. Instead I kicked him as hard as I could in the ribs. He coughed again and doubled over, this time blood sprayed from his mouth.

"It's a shame it's for nothing, really," he said once his fit had subsided, "You loving her, I mean. It's all completely worthless in the end. To love is to destroy and to be loved is to be destroyed. That's just how it is. Always."

"I feel sorry for you," I spat, "I feel sorry for you because you think that way. And because you will never know what it feels like to want to protect someone with your life."

Jonathan grinned, his smile bloody.

"I did feel that way once. I would have done anything for my baby sister but that was before. Now I just want to rip her apart, limb by limb, until there is nothing left of her."

"You're disgusting." I said, raising the blade directly in line with his heart. He looked down at it with consideration before he grabbed hold of the tip and dragged it closer to himself.

"Go on. End it." He dared, "Or are you too weak, Angel boy?"

My second's hesitation was the only window he needed to swipe his leg out and kick me in the kneecap. The sword clattered to the ground and Jonathan leapt on top of me, his hands fisted in my hair. He pulled my head up and drove it towards the ground. My eyes lost focus for a moment because of the blow, but my body reacted instinctively. I pushed my weight against his; rolling us so I was above him with my hands clasped around his neck.

He laughed. The sound was manic.

"Go on. Kill me. I'm dead anyway! We both are! Me and her, we're as good as dead already." he cackled, blood spitting from his mouth.

I punched him twice in the face, taking sick pleasure from the flow of blood than ran from his already smashed nose. My knuckles were covered in it. I sprang to my feet and scanned around, looking for the sword. It lay a few meters away. If only I could just-

Jonathan swiped at me with a seraph blade he'd pulled from the sheath at his hip, cutting through the gear on my chest. I dodged to the left as he swung wildly again, making my way to the sword. I could see Jonathan was panicking. He didn't have long left in him. He lunged towards me, just catching my cheek with the tip of the blade. I could feel a brief sting but I was almost there. The sword was inches away. I didn't have time to think about the pain.

I made a dive for it, swiping it up in less than a second and spinning to face Jonathan. He swung blindly and I parried with ease, driving the sword forward as hard as I could. I felt the resistance of skin against the blade. And then-

Jonathan became very still.

I dropped my grip on the sword as Jonathan fell to his knees. It protruded from his chest, the blade visible from behind. Even in this state, on the brink of death, he was still smiling.

"I've had this sword my entire life," he gasped, his gaze fixed on the place the sword had entered his body, "It's fitting that I die with it, don't you think?"

I blinked twice, "Live by the sword, die by the sword."

He grinned hazily up at me and nodded his head.

"Yeah,"

I watched as his eyes clouded over for a few minutes before I finally decided it was time to put an end to this gruesome show. I took hold of the hilt of his sword and tested my grip. I yanked the sword with a grimace and he cried out in pain.

"Hail and farewell, Jonathan Morgenstern," I said quietly and pulled the sword clean out of his body. Jonathan collapsed to the ground, completely motionless.

It was over.

* * *

I staggered slowly towards the crowd of people, Jonathan's sword dragging across the flagstone behind me like some kind of gruesome token. The entire length of the blade was still crimson with his blood- still warm from his body.

I felt nothing.

People turned as they heard me approach, whispering to one another like gossiping teenagers. I could only imagine the kind of things they were saying but I couldn't find it in me to care. I was tired. All I wanted to do was go to sleep and never wake up.

"It's him," I heard someone whisper as I got closer to the crowd. People started shuffling out of my way, forming a path through the huddle of survivors. They stared at my bloodstained clothes and the open wounds on my face like I was some kind of animal on display at a zoo; like I was nothing but a curiosity. I didn't look at any of them. I _couldn't_ look at any of them.

"_Do you think he knows?"_

"_Whose sword is that?"_

"_I don't think he's been told…"_

I carried on walking towards the front of the crowd but my curiosity piqued somewhat. Did I know what? What hadn't I been told? I picked up my pace, spotting a familiar sheet of raven black hair some way in front of me. She must have heard the frantic whispers that followed me as I started running because she whipped around, her face whiter than pure snow.

"Wait, Jace. Stop." She said, her voice thick with tears. She held out a shaking hand to stop me from passing her.

"What?" I asked. I was shocked by how flat my voice was.

"You shouldn't…"

"Shouldn't _what_, Izzy?"

She looked at me for what must have been the first time ever with vulnerability in her eyes and to be honest, that one look scared me more than anything else I'd seen tonight.

"Jace, I'm so sorry,"

My heart stopped. Four words and I was sure I would never breathe again.

"Who?" I asked with a tight voice. People around us were leaning in closer, trying to hear what was being said with sick, morbidly curious looks on their faces. Maryse placed her hand on my shoulder and Alec took a step towards me, his hands held in helpless fists. The oddest part was, he was crying. Magnus was stood beside him, Max curled up close to his side. He stroked my younger brother's hair and whispered almost silently to him over and over again. Luke was stood to one side, gazing at something I couldn't quite see with tears in his eyes.

Where was Clary?

"Isabelle," I said in warning, my hands starting to shake, "what the hell is going on?"

She swallowed hard and blinked, shaking her head.

"It's… she's…"

"No." I said quietly.

"There's nothing we can do, she's gone." Isabelle choked.

"No. No, no, no. You're lying. I only saw her a few minutes ago. She was alive. She was coming to find you for help." my voice grew steadily louder until I was screaming in Izzy's face. I threw the sword to the ground like it was litter, not wanting to touch something so affiliated with _her_. Tears spilled from Izzy's eyes as she watched me clutch my hair helplessly, slowly breaking apart.

"Where is she?" I shouted. Isabelle didn't say anything. I charged past her and grabbed the front of Alec's shirt in my fists.

"Alec, tell me where she is or by the Angel I'll kill you." I growled, barely two inches away from his face. He blinked quickly, getting rid of the tears in his eyes. His face set.

"Let go of me Jace."

"Not until you-"

"I said, _let go of me Jace_." He said darkly, "Fighting me now isn't going to help, even if you think it will."

I uncurled my fists slowly, sluggishly seeing what I was doing, and stepped back quickly, feeling the first tears stabbing against my eyes. Alec took me by the elbow and pushed through the rest of the crowd in to a tiny clearing, encircled by yet more people. I could hardly move my legs or see through my water filled eyes but I could make out the splay of crimson red hair on the ground in front of me. I wiped my eyes furiously with the back of my hand and sprinted forward.

"Clary!" I yelled as I dropped down on my knees beside Jocelyn who was cradling a broken, pale and bloodied Clary in her arms, whispering softly to her daughter. I grasped one of her hands in mine and let the tears spill freely from my eyes, crying her name over and over again in a morbid chant.

"What happened?" I managed to choke out. Jocelyn looked to me as though she'd only just realize I was there and bit her lip, keeping her tears back.

"The rune… it killed her…"

* * *

**Epilogue**

I was everywhere and nowhere all at once. Noise surrounded me but then again… was there really any sound? My body ached and burned but it felt lighter than it ever had- as though I was floating. I was surrounded by bright white light and deep, mat blackness all at once.

It was horrific.

It was bliss.

I was terrified.

_The justice of heaven is hard to comprehend, but it is justice none the less_, a voice spoke to me from the middle of the abyss I was standing in. I couldn't have moved to find the source even if I'd wanted too.

_You understand that this was the way it had to end?_

_Yes_, I thought, and the word rang out loud and clear around me.

_Do you understand what has become of you?_

_I… I think I'm dead._ My 'voice' whispered. I was surprised at how easily I accepted that fact, like it was inevitable. A name prodded lightly in the back of my mind but I couldn't grasp it.

_Yes and no. _The Other voice replied. I didn't reply for an indefinite amount of time.

_Who are you?_

_I think you already know the answer to that question._

_Raziel?_

_Yes._ The angel said solemnly. I suddenly felt a deep rooted sadness.

_I… I don't want to be dead. I think… I think there are people waiting for me._

_You have done a great service to your kind tonight, Clarissa Morgenstern. For this you can compel me to one action. What is it that you want the most?_

_I… I know there is something…_

_Remember, Clarissa. Remember the name._

With the angels words, images of gold flashed all around me; I saw eyes, a smile, a pair of pure gold wings protruding from a figures back. I saw two people sat side by side on some park bench, the same couple fighting in a gym, talking in a basement, kissing and crying- about to be pulled apart from one another. The images flicked around me like they were imprinted on an old film reel; grainy and almost static and then…

Then one word- a name- screamed all around me, loud enough to burst my ear drums. It took me a moment to realize that I was the one screaming, and that the name was-

"Jace!"

* * *

**The Other Epilogue**

_Four years later_

Jace stood alone at the foot of the grave, his hands stuffed in to the pockets of his white dress pants. The sun was just setting and it cast hues of red, orange, gold and purple all around him. The light breeze tousled his hair and stung at his eyes, but it didn't bother him too much. It had been a long time since he'd visited this place and as he stared at the ground, he felt the beginnings of tears prick at his eyes. He blinked them away, determined to be strong.

"Hey…" he started lamely, unsure of what to say when he knew he wouldn't get an answer back.

"Sorry it's taken me so long to visit. Things have been real busy lately. The treaties have finally been signed… we're officially at peace with the Downworlder's, so I guess that's great news. I've been training a lot and helping out with Max and the other kids who've moved in to the institute. He's thirteen now and he's a pretty good fighter… He's got his first crush, too. Her name is Joanie. She's pretty cool for a kid, I guess. She can decapitate the training dummies without any trouble.

"Alec and Magnus are still going strong… I think they want to get married or something but I don't know if they should… Alec will grow old but Magnus won't. I can't even imagine how they'll deal with that. I'll support them either way though, so…

"Isabelle got a boyfriend. It's that guy Simon who lived next door to Jocelyn- she's doing good, by the way. She got married to Luke and they have twin boys. But anyway, back to Izzy. It's a funny story really if you think about it… Simon managed to get bitten by some vampire and now he's a Downworlder so she can be with him. I still think he's an idiot, but he's keeping her happy so I guess that's fine with me.

"Maryse and Robert are fine. They've been kept busy with all of the Clave stuff but… you know what? I don't really know why I'm telling you about any of them. " Jace ran his hand through his hair and sighed loudly.

"I've grown up a lot in the last few years but I guess that was inevitable, really. I'm twenty one now. I don't have room to act childish and big headed. It's weird; everyone in our world knows my name when they see me and there are all these adoring fans who know exactly what we did. They say we saved the world and… I guess we did, really. But I don't care about that. The old me would have- I would have loved it- but people change. Everything changes eventually. Everything…

"Is it strange to miss someone you barley even knew? I do. I think about it all the time- what I could have had, I mean. I think about what I could have been like, but there's no point dwelling over things you've lost, is there? What doesn't kill you makes you stronger… losing this made me stronger. I think we're all better for it." Jace finished quietly. He drew his seraph blade from the sheath at his waist, named it, and plunged it deep in to the ground at his feet. He wiped a stray tear from his cheek and stared at the blade for an immeasurable amount of time before he felt a thin pair of arms snake around his waist.

"You okay?"

Jace's mouth curled up in to a small smile and he nodded his head as he twisted around to wrap his arms around the petite red head in front of him. She looked up at him with a sad smile and kissed his cheek lightly.

"They'd be so proud of you," Clary whispered in to his chest. Jace held her tighter and buried his face in to her hair.

"I hope so. I know I didn't know them at all- I only know what other people have told me- but they're still my family, my real parents. I want them to know that everything's okay."

"_Is_ everything okay?" Clary asked, looking up in to his eyes. Jace could see the worry in her face but he doubted anyone else would have spotted it. He nodded with a smile.

"More than okay."

* * *

**So there it is. This story is over. I'll be continuing my other fic, All's fair when love is war, so go ahead and check that out if you want. It's fluffy :3 **

**Let me know what you think.**

**For the last time on this story,**

**ML, out.**


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